163 We are gonna be in a Movie!

Episode Summary

Episode 163 of A Cigar Hustler's Podcast opens with local filmmaker Danny Velazquez of Firecoast Video & Photo, who explains how a simple location scout at the shop turned into the hosts being cast in his independent short film "Parallels." Danny walks through the premise — a character named Jared dealing with lucid-dreaming research and parallel realities — and breaks down the two roles: Palmer as "Joe" the bartender and Mike as "Chris," the shady antagonist/liaison who starts blackmailing the lead. They talk about out-of-order shooting so the lead actor's hair and beard can change scene to scene, the "one take" joke versus real coverage, ad-libbing versus sticking to the script, Christopher Nolan influences (Memento, Inception, Tenet), and a $20 wig. The hosts plan to document the whole filmmaking experience on the podcast. There's also side chat about Danny Vasquez (formerly of RoMa Craft, now The Voyage cigars) being a lifelong Bucs fan, and the shop's Facebook movie-quote contest where one host intentionally answered every quote wrong.

The news segment covers TPE 2021 being held in person in Las Vegas May 12–14, including the restrictions — masks required on the trade show floor at all times, meaning no smoking while walking, plus temperature checks — and how that compares to the PCA convention. They also cover Drew Estate's Liga Privada 10 Year Anniversario Savage Feast, an event-only release in the Feral Pig perfecto vitola available only at events Jonathan Drew attends, replacing the Unico Serie A, with its Connecticut-grown criollo wrapper, Mexican San Andrés binder and Nicaraguan/Pennsylvania (Green River One Sucker) filler. Blackworks Studio's new Cameroon-wrapped Hyena in Corona Gorda and Lonsdale gets covered via James Brown's comments, followed by the cigar industry's latest court filing asking a federal court to vacate FDA's deeming regulations for premium cigars, and Senator Marco Rubio's reintroduced Traditional Cigar Manufacturing and Small Business Jobs Preservation Act. Florida news, a Costco seafood-in-the-pants story, and Listener of the Week Michael Rosales round out the segment.

The back half is a re-aired interview with Steve Saka of Dunbarton Tobacco & Trust. Saka talks about being one of the few manufacturers still traveling, why nothing gets developed unless he's physically in Nicaragua, and the brutal quality-control year he had — destroying roughly 12,000–13,000 cigars in his own warehouse and rejecting nearly an entire brand shipment over spongy, moisture-damaged cigars. He explains the "Saka tax" built into his factory pricing, staying at Gustavo Cura's house in Estelí (and the tobacco-industry intel he picks up there), and the logistical nightmare of COVID testing windows, Avianca's 36-hour rule and $2,400 one-way tickets to get out of Nicaragua. He closes on Smoke Inn's Great Smoke, Abe Dababneh's crashed server, and why he agreed to make more of his Costa Rica Morón event exclusive — as long as buyers pay up front.

In This Episode

1. 01
   Danny Velazquez & Firecoast Video and Photo
   Local filmmaker Danny Velazquez explains how a location scout at the cigar shop turned into the hosts joining the cast of his short film.
2. 02
   Casting 'Parallels' — Joe the Bartender and Chris the Antagonist
   Breakdown of the film's lucid-dream/parallel-realities premise and the two roles the hosts will play, plus continuity, wardrobe and look changes.
3. 03
   Indie Filmmaking Craft Talk
   Ad-libbing versus script, shooting out of order, multiple takes, cheap wigs and Christopher Nolan's influence on the project.
4. 04
   Cigar Hustler's Facebook Movie-Quote Contest
   One host confesses he answered every movie-quote prompt wrong on purpose and racked up thousands of angry comments.
5. 05
   TPE 2021 Happening In Person — With Rules
   The Las Vegas trade show is on for May 12–14, but masks on the floor mean no smoking while walking and temperature checks for all attendees.
6. 06
   New Releases: Liga Privada Savage Feast & Blackworks Hyena
   Drew Estate's event-only Liga Privada 10 Year Anniversario Savage Feast in the Feral Pig vitola, plus Blackworks Studio's Cameroon-wrapped Hyena.
7. 07
   FDA Lawsuit and Rubio's Exemption Bill
   The industry asks a federal court to vacate the deeming regulations while Marco Rubio reintroduces a premium cigar FDA exemption bill.
8. 08
   Steve Saka Interview
   Saka on Nicaragua travel during COVID, destroying 12,000+ cigars for quality control, the 'Saka tax,' Gustavo Cura's house, and the Great Smoke.

Brands & Cigars Discussed

Linked items are in our shop. Mentions without a link aren’t currently stocked or couldn’t be matched with confidence.

Transcript

- Welcome to episode 163 of the Cigar Hustler Podcast. - 163. - You double check, make sure I had the right number, didn't you? - Uh-huh.

I don't know if you can see over there. - I got my glasses on, I can see. - I worry. I worry about you.

- I'm fine. - I don't think you're fine. - I'm fine. I'm fine today.

Took my medicine and everything. Doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom. Take your Onnit, your Joe Rogan Onnit. Is that what he takes now?

He's always promoting some shit. Oh. Is he hotboxing and cold plunging? Mike Square.

He does hotbox. Does he really? Yeah, he does. He does.

All right, we have Danny Vasquez. Velazquez. Velazquez. It's a little tough, but Velazquez, there you go.

Velazquez is how I say it. You're fucking it up because of the other Danny. Oh, yeah. This is a better Danny because he has more letters in his last name.

Oh, is that what makes it better? I thought he was just a better person. No, Danny Vasquez is a nice guy. He's okay.

Yeah, he's sweet. He's a sweet man. Gentle. I don't know him, but he sounds great.

He's been getting enough shit like... All right, well, hold on, hold on, hold on, go ahead, go ahead. Hold on, we have a little business to take care of here first. Let me handle that for you.

Today's show brought to you by the Octador by Case Elegance. The team at Case Elegance has spent years meticulously crafting this humidor to be their largest and best yet, fitting up to a hundred cigars. The deluxe humidor features a striking octagon silhouette, posh black piano finish, glass top, front digital hydrometer, accessory storage drawers, Spanish cedar, magnetic closures, and the patent-pending hydro system. Case Elegance has undergone extensive research, testing, and customer feedback to solve every shortcoming commonly experienced with other humidors.

Cleverly recessed into the base is the included patent-pending hydro system, an accurate and low-maintenance cigar humidification system that makes dialing in and maintaining your humidor easy. Case Elegance integrated a front-facing digital hydrometer offering you peace of mind that your sticks are kept to your desired humidity. Properly store your lighter, cigar cutter, and travel case in the large bottom accessory storage door. This stunning octodore is finished in a lacquered black piano with slight undertone of black wood grain.

The solid metal hardware mirrors the octagonal shape and comes in a modern spacecraft finish. The octodore by Case Elegance is one of the highest rated and most comprehensive cigar humidors on the market. A striking shape, beautiful finishes, and thoughtful engineering makes this a must-have for any cigar aficionado. com for more information and purchasing.

I like to make faces and stuff. He does. I've noticed that. For the YouTubers.

He gets bored during the commercial. So I'm like, you know, 'cause I can't just, 'cause I've watched me, like, I'll go and review our YouTubes. Yeah. And I'm like, man, I'm just, I just sit there.

Just staring at nothing. You're supposed to be just... Like I start moving some shit around and stuff. Respectful and just...

I'm very, I'm adding, I'm adding value. We're getting complaints. I'm adding value. It's almost like a Vanna White type of, you know what I'm saying?

Yeah, I wave over it. Well, he used to just do this, and it was very nice, but now he's mocking me sitting over there. " Oh, a hundred cigars of me. I do like the accessory spot on the bottom.

The accessory door? Yeah, I didn't realize that. Yes. I can't reach it, but yeah.

I often misplace things, so that makes it convenient, yeah. Yes. I just opened it. Can't really get it from the side.

Yeah, don't, don't, don't flip it onto the floor. Anyway, Danny is our, he's a local guy. What's the name of your company again, Danny, please? The company is Firecoast Video & Photo.

It's me and my wife starting it, and what we do is different promo videos. I mean, honestly, anything from weddings as well to corporate events, just photography and video needs for anything, which is actually how I got to know these guys. Yes. Yes, because we have questions all the time, and we need people to answer them.

Because the two of us will debate about, you know what, I don't know, just call Danny and ask him. We're just kind of forced coming our way through all the shits. When moving to this area, you know, of course, I want to find out a cigar area, and this is just an amazing place, and talk to them about some different services and whatnot, and find out we have a lot in common with the love for film and just stuff like that, as well as obviously cigars to start with. Oh, you got a cigar.

I was going to offer one out of your Case Elegance Humano. Oh, my Case Elegance Humano? Well, maybe if I'm staying here long enough, you know, maybe I can. Maybe it gets to it.

Who knows? Am I good on volume? Sometimes I drift. Yeah, you just got to stay in front of it.

You can hear yourself. Okay. Ooh, now it's so romantic. Ladies and gentlemen.

Yeah, see? That's funny. But, you know, obviously this is Danny Velasquez, but the other Danny Vasquez, the Danny, former Roma, New Voyager, New Voyage Cigars, is it New Voyage or just Voyage? I don't know.

It's Voyager, The Voyager. The Voyager? That's a Star Trek thing. Maybe it's, maybe he's a big Trekkie.

Who knows? No, I think it's just The Voyage. Just The Voyage. The Voyage.

He's been getting some shit when the Bucs won. People were like, "You're not a fan. " The motherfucker guy has been a Bucs fan. Well, before I was a Bucs fan.

Well, they're probably just assuming that because he just moved back to Tampa. Oh, because you go to Tampa one year. Everybody's got a break pulse. And then some people are talking to me on the phone.

They're like, oh, yeah. And Danny says he's a Bucs fan. I'm like, he's been a Bucs fan. He lived in Florida before he moved for Roma.

Yeah, he's been a Bucs fan. Wait, did he live up north somewhere New England-y, South Carolina-ish? Yeah, Maryland. Maryland.

Why you got to take it away from the guy? No, I'm not saying you. I'm just saying. Why do you got to take it away?

It's like, why, you know, the fucking, he was, he went to like the little Super Bowl things and stuff. Oh, he did. I did see him in those little things. I had, yeah.

Throwing the football. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. Nice.

Good for him. Yeah. So, Danny, I love you, Danny. I just want you to know.

And I'm going to say that he was saying that to me. Yeah. And I love you too, Danny. Thank you.

I appreciate that, Mike. It's all about the love. So, all about the love. You want to say what else we're doing with Danny or what?

Well, that's up to Danny as much as he does. Danny, what are we doing with you? There's some things he doesn't want to, he wants to be a little vague. Well, no, I realized, because we were messaging a little bit and whatnot, and I realized that I don't need to be that cryptic, because first of all, it's not like this is some secret Hollywood, you know, pitch, that, you know, from it, I'm just glad that you guys would be, first of all, I mean, I don't know where to start with this, to be honest, because there's still some pieces that we need to work out.

Okay, right, well, that's what I thought we would do here on the show. Yeah, where's my contract? Yeah, he's got a writer that's seven pages long. You need a trailer, and just blue M&M's, and a hot box, and a cold plunge.

Solely blue M&M's. Those are hard to find, I think. With the M's. Actually, a random bit of trivia, what is the toughest color to find M&M?

What is the rarest color? Yellow. From what I heard, incorrect. Brown.

That's what I heard. I didn't think that was that. Why would brown be the toughest? Now, check me on that, because maybe I'm wrong.

I just read it somewhere. We don't fact check on this. Okay, good, good. I get that right.

All I have is a gong for this right at the moment. We don't fact check on this. Yeah, you could say it was purple. Of course I'm right then.

Yeah, that's what it was. Obviously. That's cool. So you have a production company.

Mm-hmm. We became friends. You were originally gonna come in here and do a shoot. Mm-hmm.

And somehow we've weaseled our way into pretty much taking over the entire thing. Which I love for a number of reasons. First, if it's just gonna be a location, can I just maybe shoot it in it? Right.

Okay, but we would like to be in it. And so I've been making short films for a while, and for someone who is doing their own independent It is difficult to find good locations. If you don't know people, if you don't have access. So, for example, in this short film, we wanted a bar scene and it had the, and we actually came up with this idea.

I was originally my friend Keith's idea and I've been helping him with it. So anyway, we came up with this idea before COVID happened. And so we were thinking it might be much easier to get in different areas. So I still come in and talk to you guys, obviously for cigar stuff and just happened to be like, well, wait, is it possible we could do it here?

Cause we're going to rewrite the script completely to try and fit what's going on. Right. And I was explaining to my, I'm long winded when I talk, so I apologize about that first. No, no, please.

We can relax. We'll just turn you off after you want. We'll just boop mute. I'm just still going and thinking that I'm, you know.

He just said they're talking away, and we have a whole 'nother show going on. " And then he finally just shuts me up, "Danny, we'd be glad to. " Yeah, let me stop you. Yes, yes, yes.

Okay, it's already, it's over. We said no problem. You just come in, you can use the fucking bar. But I have seven more things to discuss on my list.

" I'm like, "We'll figure it out. Stop. Yes, you're in. " I always put disclaimers.

And from that, you know, at some point soon, I don't know if we want to do it right now, but that will be the next thing. You and I haven't fully communicated about the role. Yeah, because I can't get naked and I'm not making out with anybody. We can still do some rewrites if we need to then.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, topless though is okay, right? Will I have pasties? I mean, I have limitations.

Up to you. What's, you know, frontal is, what are they called if it's from the back? Backle? Full Monty is the front.

Yeah, so there's got to be a word for getting the butt. Yeah. Just a butt shot? Is that okay?

Butt shot. Good. It'll be tastefully done, Michael. Very tasty.

It's an artsy, artsy movie. Okay, good, good, good. Well, with some of this, we decided... A lot of flexing, too.

Could you leave Danny alone? Let him finish? Well, no, we decided that, first of all, when I first came in here, to talk about... Actually, not even to talk about this.

Don't make me direct. You shut up. Oh, goodness. Am I already cut off?

No, no, you're good. No, no, me. Don't mean to shut up. I saw Palmer behind the bar there, and that was the first time I've ever seen this guy before in my life, you know, when I was first coming and talking to you guys about my business and everything.

So anyway, it kind of seems like some weird sort of serendipitous, like natural, that now he is playing the bartender in our short film here. Yeah, and actually... Bartender have a name? I was just about to say, I think it's Joe.

Joe. Joe the bartender. Fucking Joe. You could probably have some input if you want something a little bit more...

No, Joe's fine. You look like a Joe. Joe's fine, I'd go with Joe. I'd go with Joe.

And then from that, we had another character, and I won't get into all the specifics of why things went. I don't know if I went wrong, but it has been my experience, especially with this type of filmmaking, which is very, you know, low level in terms of we don't have these major contracts that anybody would care to walk out on in terms of being a problem, he basically didn't show up, and at this point, I'm like, well, if you remember too, Mikey, that same first meeting, we were talking then, you know, we got off about the business stuff and started talking a little bit more about film stuff, before I left, I even said, hey, if I ever have a part for you, you know, I'd love to get you in. So again, that serendipitous thing, now this role that I want to talk to you about has three different scenes. And you're basically the antagonist of the film, right?

Ooh. I'm shooing. He's in. He's always angry.

I'm always an antagonist. Always angry. And that's good, because this character, how it was originally written, had a little bit more of a, I don't know if goofy is the right word, which is good, because I don't take you as a goofy guy, you can be more serious, it seems like. I feel goofy sometimes.

I say almost, but I won't be acting if I have to be an antagonist. That's true. It'll be natural. It'll be so natural for you.

It's a good place to start with this one, anyway. Which, by the way, have you ever done any sort of acting stuff before? No, man. Well, you played mad in one of our videos we did here.

I did. And I did start, I started classes. I took one class so far. Oh, cool.

Did you say real quick, you played Madden? No, I played Madden. I was supposed to be angry. Oh, okay.

I want to hear your Madden impression now. No, no, I didn't play Madden. Oh, yeah, you can do Madden. I might do Madden.

Oh, this is sports. But you know what's really funny is I actually went through and I watched that video and I fucking, I'm like, man, I messed up here, here, like I was looking at it. Oh, no, you did a good job. Thanks.

I appreciate that. But still, you know the rule here, cigar houses are one take. Yeah. Yeah.

I don't think that's necessary. We're a one take type organization. We just do it in first one. Danny, that's not the case.

We're done. We can work well together then because unfortunately I'm quite the opposite. Part of the reason being is that when I'm editing later on, I realized like, man, we should have tried another angle, man, we should have got to reshoot. No, we'll, we'll, we'll do plenty angles.

Well, you know, I have no problem with the abuse. Okay. Well, I mean, from that it's three scenes that would be in and we could talk more particular. I mean, we could do it on the show here.

We talk after, but let's do it now. I think we should probably talk about it after because it's going to be longer. When also, again, this is something we can talk about after, but I did, I always bring material, so I actually do even have the script with me, so we could put both you guys on the spot right now. Oh, we can read our lines?

Oh, yeah. We can save that for later. Because I tried that with him, he gets very angry, he won't read stuff. Yeah.

Yeah, we can look at that stuff. Because it was some peepee line or something, and you didn't want to do that. Yeah, probably. Yeah, probably.

Well, so where we're finally at with it is we're ready to film those, so I mean, and again, we don't have to get the exact particulars right here on the show, but- Oh, we don't, the paparazzi are probably listening, we don't want to give the- Yeah, yeah, get that, everyone... Is that your agent already just texting you now? No. No.

No. Oh. My wife. So your agent.

Oh. Yeah, my agent. Yeah. She's my manager.

Manager. Totally different. Oh. What's the difference?

Oh, she said she left the shop late. Oh. Sorry. Say sorry.

Yeah. Well, it was a long meeting. The whole show just came to a screeching halt. Sorry.

Well, this is business, too. Yeah, the kids are important. Yes, bud. Okay, so yeah, we'll go over that with you.

We'll start going things. But at least we made like the introduction where, you know, we can introduce in on the podcast and kind of get that done. Well, as I told you, we want to sort of document the entire experience through the podcast. Yeah, we can review, like we'll do some video clips, we'll do some things with you and then we'll sit back down and say, okay, well, this is what we did yesterday.

And without giving it away, because we don't want to, you know, we don't want to tell the whole storyline. I just wonder, should we talk about it all, or do you kind of want to start wrapping this up pretty soon in terms of the film stuff? I would wrap it up from here. You don't want to do anything else?

No, just leave it. We're open here. This is a good beginning. Well, let's hear about your character a little, who you're going to be playing other than it's just the antagonist.

Okay, do you want to do that? What's his character's name? Do a little character development. Earl.

His name is Earl. Earl. Oh, I like Earl. Earl and Joe.

Earl and Joe. Two regular guys. We have three teeth between us. You remember that game, Toe Jam and Earl?

Toe Jammin' Earl Saga, right? You know what I'm talking about? Yeah. Okay.

Anyway, the name would be Chris. Not that that matters too much. The main thing, the important thing to know about him is he is the liaison between what this main character is doing. So our main guy, Jared, and this company that he works for.

Basically, Jared's in some trouble. He's been doing his own thing with his business and with the company's money. " And kind of start to blackmail him somewhat. Yeah, it's definitely a It's a shady character that should come off, if anything, a little bit more intimidating, in the first couple lines, if you can deliver it, you know, be a little bit more, hey, you know, I'm on your side, but then quickly by the end of the conversation, it's, you know, you're in my pocket type of thing, and play by my rules, or else it's gonna be trouble for you.

Got 'em! Throw 'em in the trunk. You say at the end, got 'em! No ad libbing, Michael, stick to the script, please.

Actually, and by the way, I love ad libbing. So although we do have the... I'm sorry, I mean, although we... So you know nothing.

I know nothing. It's safe to say that you have no fucking idea what you're doing. now and we'll talk about this more in a time the way i personally love to film stuff is to actually do stick for the script the first you know take or two that way we know we got it but from there if you start getting because usually when we're filming too people are a little bit more tense just like i am right now first time work with you guys right you know but yeah if i did this a couple more times i'm sure i'd loosen up more and more you want the legitimate feeling exactly right and you don't want something you know verbatim off of the script right because when it's verbatim it's not it's not real yeah because it might not be the way i would deliver the line so it's like you You indicate, you say, I can't indicate, I can't. You can't tell me how I would speak.

Well, I can't respond to your emotion without seeing your emotion and then responding. If I already have it in my mind that this is how I'm going to respond, then it's fucked. Right. Yeah, because there's no organicness to the conversation that it just feels.

And then if he delivers his line a little bit weaker or stronger, you'll react accordingly to that. Right. Absolutely. Do we have any scenes together?

Yeah, you're the bartender. You're gonna say, where the fuck have you been? Well, yeah, but maybe you weren't there. I know I do with the other guy.

So, the way that this scene lays out is that the first part is actually Jared and Joe. So, they just talk real quick. And unfortunately, you guys only have one little exchange. You just have one line.

It's actually, he gets a vodka tonic, I think is what's in the script, but if that's not your date, you know, we can make it. That's off the table. Can I get it with an umbrella as I antagonize these people? Actually integral to the script.

So, I don't know if we can adjust that one. Oh, is it? No, no, it's not. The vodka tonic.

But little things. Sponsor the movie, Micah. I feel like I do want to say one thing at least about it. And again, you can cut this out.

I don't know if you guys do a lot. We don't edit fucking anything. No, no, we have. We have edited some things.

The thing people have said things that we felt may not have come across. To protect them, yeah. Okay, understood, fair enough. But as far as like the dream thing goes, it is actually an important element for Jared's character, because basically what he's dealing with, the film's called parallels.

Right. So it's not anything to give it away that this guy's going through parallel situations and then to say parallel realities. Right. And this is from this machine thing that he's been working on that started with this whole dream thing.

He's trying to understand more of a way to communicate with people during, uh, while they're having like lucid dreams, right? Uh, so anyway, it developed into this whole other thing because of what he happened personally in his life. So you're like Christopher Nolan. I mean, you're the same guy pretty much.

I do have a lot of respect for his films. And it's funny. I was talking about, uh, with Jared, um, though, the character, Jared Keith yesterday about him in particular, you know, uh, are you guys big fans of Christopher Nolan? I am.

I know the name. I could Batman tennis. Yeah. You know, the film.

Okay. Yeah, first of all, you guys are movie guys. I mean, yeah, Batman, the whole saga there, Tenet, he started with Memento, which I shouldn't admit that I haven't seen all of Memento, I get a lot of stuff for that a lot. He wrote that down a lot, writes everything down on his body.

What was the one with Leonardo DiCaprio, the dreams, the dreams, the dreams, the dreams? Inception. Inception, absolutely. So some really cool, he plays with time a lot, and so we're not playing so much with time, but definitely with parallels.

yeah and how this we could be doing this exact same thing so this is how part of just to put a little bit more of a uh a visualization to this every scene that he is in his look changes so when we first started filming this is part of the reason why it's taking some time to film when we filmed the first scene he's homeless in this alleyway that we filmed in sanford actually and his beard is almost double the size of mine his hair is you know like down to here um by the end of the film he's going to almost have a shaved head but that's but the way that we are shooting it is out of order so we're filming it to make sure that you know obviously we don't have to wait for his hair to grow back out so we're filming in the order that he gets the hair cut but when we actually edit it together at different points you know in one scene he's looking like this and the next scene you know he has no beard or a goatee or right the issue with that is we want to do that for everybody and the guy that we originally had to play the chris character was on board to change his look three times as well because that's what he's talking about yeah i'm not going to ask you to do all that uh because so i mean if you want to hey that'd be perfect well i have to know you gotta tell me what you're thinking and i can see if i can do it well i mean See, one of the things, it could be as simple as-- I didn't think it was going to go very far. I mean, just maybe even gelling the hair different. I mean, just a different look in general. Don't look at me.

I'm Joe the bartender. For me, it's a bit of a problem, though, because I'm balding here. So there's only so much I can do with my hair. That's why, in one scene, I'm going to have a bigger beard.

I'll put a wig on you. I actually bought a wig. I don't know if you guys have ever purchased wigs before. They're expensive to get a good one.

So I bought a $20 wig. Yeah, it looks like a $20 wig. It's really more of a joke, so we can't really use it. It's every bit of a $20.

Absolutely. That's awesome. Cool. All right, well, I think that we should leave it at that.

Okay. All right, and then we can do a little bit of it. We'll sit down with Danny afterwards and kind of iron out. But before we get to, like, commercials or anything, or the news, we can, you know, bullshit a little bit more about some other stuff.

Okay. Yeah, we're at 20 minutes-ish. All right. Well, I got a couple quick minutes.

All right, go ahead. I feel like we're approaching this fuck my life kind of scenario experiences that we're all going to be experiencing in the upcoming months. Okay. And what I mean by that is, I'll give you a great example.

I went to Backyard Burger for my cheat day on Sunday. Okay. Okay, the fucking line is out the door, right? The cars are wrapped around the whole thing.

It's an outdoor mostly place too, isn't it? So, everybody's going through the drive-through, and then at the front window, there's nobody there, I'm like, oh, this will be easy as shit, I'll just walk up, fuck, I ain't getting in the fucking train. So, I walk up, and got my fucking mask on, the whole COVID bullshit, and there's a sign that says, hey, for your safety and for ours, please use this monitor to place an order. I'm like, okay, fuck it, I can use it.

Like a video screen? Yeah, it's a touch screen. Yeah, it's a touch screen. Okay.

No, there's cheeseburgers and shit like that, so like I'm navigating through this, so I'm ordering for like four or five people, right, and it's a fucking process, it's like, that's not it, so like I'm doing this for like 10 or 15 minutes, but I'm determined to figure this shit out. Is the line growing behind you? There's nobody around, there's nobody around, everybody wants to go through the drive-through, there's nobody around. " And I look at this guy and I go, you got to be fucking kidding me.

I've been here for 15 minutes, punching in burgers, no cheese, a little lettuce. And like, I'm laughing, but you can't see that, because I'm fucking masked up. But, you know, so he's like, oh man, I'm really, really sorry, boo, I'm like, dude, it's, please, it's no big deal. I just think it's fucking hilarious that, like, you know, we're at points now, especially in Florida, where everything's starting to get a little more unwound, a little more unwound.

And as the rules start to ease, you don't know where the fucking line is. Right, where the line is anymore. Because it's not a standardized thing anymore. " Right.

This is absolutely fucking horrid. So, um, have you had any of those experiences yet, Mike? No. Well, I'm sorry to hear that.

I'm sure it's coming. No. We go out to eat, we wear a mask when we go in, you sit down, you take it off, it's the most ridiculous thing. Yeah.

And if you go to the bathroom, you got to put the mask back on to walk past everybody. That's when it's safe. That's when you've got to be safe. Yeah.

It's just, it's ridiculous. And no, we're no longer reporting on the news that we're, you know, we're only having 5 or 4,000 cases. Yeah, nobody, nobody gets you there, nobody dies, it's just fine. Just let that go now.

We don't talk about it anymore in Florida. The fear isn't really there anymore. You people aren't listening to us, so we're just moving on. It's what people, we've had people come to visit and they'll go, it's like, there's no COVID in Florida.

I go, no, we don't let it happen. We shut it down. We said no more. It has no domain here.

You are not welcome here. It's the sun. It bakes it all off. The other thing that I wanted to quickly address with you, is you did a post, or Cigar Hustler did a post, you did the podcast.

" Hey, don't be giving out my tricks, these are, yeah, okay. Those are very popular. So, for entertainment purposes, I went ahead and I miss every single one, I got them wrong on purpose. So, we're gonna need a bigger boat.

I mean, that's an easy layup. A lot of people did that one, I did Lake Placid. And then if I saw it again, I did Lake Placid 2. I was so upset.

Yeah, like, so people were correcting me. No jaws. I'm like... See, there's a contest here every week for Facebook involvement that you can get people to involve.

Engage. Thank you. And Facebook tracks it for us. So, on every Monday at the meeting, we see who had the most on their post because everybody has access to it.

And then the winner gets a $10, like, gift card for the shop. Okay, yeah. So, if it was... Yeah, go ahead.

No, no, go ahead. Okay. So sometimes three, 400 involvements and everything. The most we ever had, I think, was like 9,000 and something.

I think you hit like 15,000. Was it 15? I don't remember what that one was. But Chet and I, we went in together a couple of weeks on the same post.

So we're both working it. But that one, because he's correcting people everything, was almost 6,000. Yep. So people take that seriously.

I was at like 11 or 1,200 and then I saw he was doing that and I'm like, oh, I'm just watching it click. Yeah. So there's like 95 comments and I went through all of them. So like, if you did a Tom Cruise comment, It meant, like, you know, I feel the need for speed, I'd go fucking days, no, no, I'd go Days of Thunder, you know, so I would- Oh, you'd write actor, wrong movie.

Yeah, so I would get close, and that would just piss people off even more, and then, but like, I got tired of thinking of those ideas, so then I went through Fast and Furious, Fast and Furious 2, Fast and Furious 3, Fast and Furious, like, I did all of them in a row, and people, like, some people finally caught on, they started laughing and shit. Right, right. And then, uh, I feel like I really upset a lot of people. I like how you guys are obviously both representing Cigar Hustler and creating the drama yourself.

So then other people are trying to be a part of it, thinking that they're having fun, like, no, no, no, come on, it's gotta be this film and you're just messing with them then. But this is, you know, it's just, it's not, it's really kind of funny because it's not, that's not really how we play it. It's not like, hey, you say something, then I'll go back. You know, it's like, that's not our parody.

Our parodies is we're just kind of fucking around. Yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? Well, I almost actually contributed to that one because I saw that post, and that's just a fun one to begin with.

First of all, just movie lines. Yeah, just something to throw out that people like to come in. Which, about that movie line, though, the one you said, the Jaws one, people get that wrong all the time. You know it's actually not, we're going to need a bigger boat.

The actual line is, you're going to need a bigger boat. Same with the- There's a lot of those. Exactly. Yeah, I don't know why it becomes in the social conscious a little bit off, but it is sometimes.

But who fucking cares? You know what it's about. You know it's the Jaws. It's the one with the shark.

or like somebody said somebody said a Humphrey Bogart quote and I was like Maltese Falcon fucking egg it was obviously Casablanca or some shit of all the gin joints I'm like yeah you should have said African Queen I didn't see that one I knew Maltese Falcon it's a funny movie it's really funny like quick fucking parodies back and forth shit like that so I had a good time and then somebody wrote Choke Yourself which is Full Metal Jacket but I couldn't let that one go I wrote Fifty Shades of Grey So what I like about what you're doing, it is so along the lines of like, it could fit, like it seems like it's so genuine, it's possible. For the most part, for the most part, but then like as fatigue setting. And he would say something like, "Oh, I got this one," and then say the wrong answer. Oh, this is an easy one.

This is easy. That's good. So yeah, so everybody that was on that Facebook, if you're watching or listening to the podcast, I understand that I did not get any of them right and that was on purpose. I looked down at my phone Saturday night after dinner and I had 53 notifications.

I'm like, "Something is going on. " No, Godfather. Okay, and if you corrected me, I would go to the emoji of the care. " Thank you for caring.

But that was my fun and adventures. We went to Yardhouse, too, this week. It's like a restaurant down by the Orlando line. And we went like right when COVID came out, like when they started to open up, and it was like kind of eerie, quiet, weird, and like fucking everything was kind of bolted off and like the fucking server had gloves, you know.

I'm like, I don't understand the purpose of the gloves, but okay, like, you know. And then we went to last week, fucking place is wide open. I mean, you know, they space everybody out, but nobody gives a fuck, you know, everybody's fucking over this shit. They really are.

I just saw something on the news about the Flaming Lips. I'm not so familiar with the band, but I mean, I know some of their music. Have you heard them? No.

Back in the day. I guess they're doing sold-out concerts now, and what they're doing is people are all in their own individual bubble, like literally like an inflatable bubble. So we'll walk you into your bubble? Yeah, kind of thing.

And it's probably, you know, I don't know, I guess they're thinking they're doing some safe things, but just first of all the people that handle the bubble, to get in and out of the bubble, there's got to be a lot of problems. That's where the gloves. That's where the gloves come in. Gotcha, gotcha.

Yeah, the gloves are the big saver there, yeah. It's just interesting, and yeah, like you said, things are winding down, so I did hear something else, too, that I guess the mask, some people think it is going to be a normal thing in certain communities, anyway, through all of this year. No fucking way. I don't know.

I told you, a lady at the shot place where my parents went, she said they're going to be there until at least December. I bet you June it's over. June here, you see seldom masks. Yeah?

Yep. Well, now they're saying you've got to wear two. Yeah, yeah. They're saying what?

They're saying that the numbers are going down, they don't even fucking report it anymore. Oh, I just figured it was just news cycle. No, because it's pegging down. Because you're hitting under 5,000 cases in the entire state of Florida.

We just don't tell nobody. They're like, oh, nobody cares. Nobody cares. Well, all the old people got the shot now.

Well, they're all saved. So now your death ratio is going to go down. They're all saved. And the next level is 50 or above.

Well, now apparently they're doing people with pre-existing conditions. Oh, are they? That started to get okayed too, allegedly. Or at least it's in the pipeline.

I heard up in Chicago, R. Kelly got the shot in prison in January. Yeah, you know, hey, safety first for R. Kelly, that way-- Yeah, make sure he's safe.

Is that serious? Yeah. I wonder-- They're trying to figure out why he got it in January and how he got it in January. Right.

Is he always around old people or just young people? He's in jail. I thought it was young people, yeah. He's in prison.

Yeah, that fact alone, I don't know. Well, but you know what, you don't want to have an outbreak in prison. Too bad! Don't go to prison!

Hey, that's not nice. They're people too. People make mistakes, Michael. They should be further down the list.

Listen, man, the fact of the matter is that some people make mistakes, Michael, and they get caught. That's what happens to them. We all make mistakes. Some people can run faster than others.

So, growing up, that's how it always was, me and my brother. We would always make mistakes. I would always get caught. He never would.

Because you were slower. Is that what it was? Mentally, or physically, or maybe? I don't have to be faster than the bear, I have to be faster than you.

Is your brother older or younger than you? He is older, so... Alright, we gotta break. He fucking knew he had a patsy.

I know he's gonna take the hit for this one. - Every single time. - Little Danny can't run as fast as me. - Oh, he did it.

- All right, we gotta take a break. - And your parents loved him more. - Dang it. - Oh, wow.

- That's true. - I mean, if they blame, that one, I have words to say about. I don't know. - Now he's gotta go to therapy after he leaves.

- I mean, that's fine. We gotta work through this kind of shit. I know we got a commercial. - Yeah, we gotta go.

All right, we'll be right back. - Hey, it's Mike too. Want to be part of the show? com/thecigarhustlerspodcast.

We have tiers starting at just $5 a month. For $10 a month, you get a special show swag, and then you're eligible for the weekly secret show. Secret shows cover in-depth cigar reviews, behind-the-scenes information, and sometimes, we just talk shit about people. Choose which tier works best with your budget and become an official show hustler.

Thanks for the support. All right, we're back. Episode 163 of the Cigar Husser Podcast. You noticed Danny is no longer here.

We turned Danny loose. Thank you, Danny, for sitting in, because we have the news coming up. Yeah, kind of exciting though, man, huh? How about that?

You know, oh, what, you gonna hit the news button? No, no, I said, get it ready. Oh, okay. Yeah, I'm looking forward to it.

It should be a lot of fun. It should be fun. It'll be cool. It'll be cool to get our reps in and kind of fuck up and do it, you know what I mean?

No. I'm excited. I'm so excited. You gotta get like three or four of those under your belt, and then you start going into commercials.

That's how The Rock started, Michael. Is that how he started? I thought he started with the wrestling. Before the wrestling.

Before the wrestling? Yes. I'm watching Young Rock. I'm waiting for that moment.

Independent. I can't stand that show. Really? It's not even real background.

It's fake. What do you mean it's fake? All the back stories. It's not real stories.

What are you talking about? So the guy interviewing him, you think that guy really has a talk show? The whole show is fake. And he's not a senator or a run for president or whatever he is.

Yeah, well that's okay, but you gotta Hollywood it up a little bit. No, the whole thing, the whole show is made up. But the stories are true in his life. No, no, they're not.

I've heard them before. I don't think, well, maybe he's put it all together. Of course you gotta glam it up a little bit. I mean, it's fucking TV shows.

I don't think Waffle died. Waffle. Waffle. I don't think there was a Waffle, Michael.

I think there was a Waffle. I don't think there was a Waffle. There was a time, there was a video where The Rock gave away a truck to one of his buddies or some shit. What was that, Waffle?

No, but he talked about the fact that they... So, he bought that car for... From a crackhead. I don't think so.

And there was a guy in the backseat. I don't think so. That's a true story. I don't think so.

Okay. You don't have to believe it. I don't. I don't mean to insult your hero, Michael.

Eh, well, you know... I mean, he's up there. It's a big backboard over there. You've been dragging around since you were seven.

I made it when I was like 12. Oh. Well, maybe. Maybe younger.

6th grade-ish. How old is I in 6th grade? I don't know. 10?

I was 3. I was 3. You were 3? I was 3.

When I was 12? No, I was 3 in 6th grade. Oh, wow. Started school early.

Way early. Okay, you ready to get going? Did your teacher change the diapers, or you had that figured out? Oh, I had that figured out.

Oh. Probably trained at 1. After this, go ahead. After what?

I was going to say, we do have the Steve Saka interview as well. Yes, at the end of the show, we will add the Steve Saka interview from last week, if you didn't see it on the screen. If you didn't jump on YouTube. YouTube jump on YouTube and and like and subscribe like we've asked you to like and subscribe 75,000 of you listening to us and you can't jump on a cigar house podcast on YouTube 75,000 and like and subscribe oh help us out help us help you our downloads were way up this this week on pod being because the apple one's a mess whatever out whatever works it like by a quarter or by a third it went up that's nice I don't think we need to do a cigar for the patreon by the way okay you You got stuff talking about?

I think we got some... I have some questions about some things. Yeah. I think that we have some good coverage here that we can talk about.

We have enough? Yeah. Okay. Good deal, because we don't have one picked up.

Yeah, we'll skip the review. I'm going to smoke this post onion instead. This delicious post onion habano. Oh.

Cigar Hustler Podcast news. How exciting. See, the TPE 2021 still happening as an in-person event. The TPE 2021 will happen in-person.

Tobacco Media Group, which runs the trade show, said today, they're still planning on holding this year's event on May 12th through the 14th, 2021, in Las Vegas. The announcement comes a couple of weeks after Governor Steve Sislask announced modified rules to begin to reopen various businesses across the state, including both gambling and events. Under the current plan, the state will continue, oh, I'm sorry, the state will control modified restrictions until May 1st. At that point, the restrictions will be determined by the county.

Given Las Vegas's reliance on tourism, it's widely believed that Clark County will relax the restrictions. The Las Vegas Convention Center, where TPE 2021 will be hosted, is owned by a government-owned tourism authority. That being said, the TPE 2021 attendees will be subject to a variety of restrictions in order to attend the show. Like, know what they are, Michael?

Yeah, like, you know, you can't be sick, and when was the last time you talked to anybody? A mask must be worn on the trade show floor at all times. That means no smoking. What in the fuck?

Attendees will not be able to smoke while walking around the trade show floor. They will need to smoke inside of a booth or in a designated smoking area. Oh, so you can sit down and smoke. Well, the booth is not closed.

I mean, they're open air. Yeah, but it's just like when you're in a restaurant. As soon as you sit down, you're safe. That's how it works.

So sitting, the virus does not like to sit, all attendees will be subject to a temperature check, all attendees will be subject to a temperature check, all attendees will be subject to a temperature check, TPE is different from PCA convention trade show, formerly the IPCPR convention of trade show, is that it includes all tobacco products, not just cigars. In recent years, TPE has tried to attract more premium cigar brands and has gone as far as to divide the show geographically between the traditional tobacco products like cigars and the e-cigarettes, vaping, and CBD products. The trade show is owned by Crytek International, which also owns the tobacco distributor Phillips & Kang, the cigar brand Ventura Cigar Company, and tobacco business, a magazine, and a website. TPE was originally scheduled for the January 27th to the 29th.

Switch to the next screen. Okay, wait, before you jump to the next show, can we talk about this? Sure, that's the whole idea. So, like, here's the real question when it comes to the, these conventions, right?

Yes. Calling it, deciding when you're going to be open and doing this first one, it could be really, really big. So this is scheduled for May, when is the PCA currently scheduled? I think October.

Oh, way back in the fall. I think. Everybody's pushing them back, hoping that everything's good. To allow more time.

But what's going to happen, like, when the first one opens up, as long as it's not premature, you should have a big turnout. No? You would think that. You would think.

I mean, the Super Bowl was sold out as much as they would sell. Right. But the hard thing is. You haven't heard of any, you know, outbreaks in the Tampa area since it's happened.

Right. So, I mean, that sort of went okay. So, the hard thing to determine is when are we good to go to do this. I don't know.

How are they going to police the masking? I mean, if they see somebody not walking, walking with a mask on. Security guards walking around, I'm sure. Put your mask on.

Well, I just lit this cigar. Too bad. Yeah. So, now when I sit down, so now if I want to have a cigar, I got to go sit down in a booth.

Go sit in that chair. I'm sitting. I'm sitting. I'm in the booth.

I'm in the booth. So it's sitting in the booth. So, I mean, I can't like stand in the room of the booth. Sir, I'm gonna need you to sit down.

You're safe if you sit. I bring my own chair. I'm in my own booth. I get one of those bubbles he talked about at the concert.

I saw a photo day, some high school band had put every band person in this little, like those, well, like the pop-up showers that you can get when you're out in the camping, except the top was vented somehow, so you could see the person from like here up. Do you need to take that? I don't know. Yes, I do.

Would you like to pause? Let's pause real quick. Okay, we're back. Oh, but that whole thing I have to edit out of the video.

That's okay. It's not a big deal. Yeah. Okay.

Sorry, Mike, let me take a phone call. Very, very, very important. If my wife calls, sometimes I want to make sure everything exists. She knows normally a podcast is going on.

I understand. She said she forgot. She apologized. It's fine.

Just relax. You don't have to yell at me. So the band members are in a box? Yeah, they're like individual shower stall things and they're going to play on their instruments inside the thing, but it just looked ridiculous.

If there's going to be a room 101 set up there, what I'm going to do is I'm going to walk around with Matt. And I'm going to smoke a cigar and if somebody walks up to me, I'm going to put my hand in his pocket. And they're going to say, sir, you have to be in a booth. I'm going to say, I am, motherfucker.

What? Matt Booth. Boom. You'll have an erection all day long.

I'm like, problem solved. Work, living in the gray area. Or Matt, have an erection all day long. Like, if I'm Matt Booth, I'm selling.

Why buy stuff from a dick? Right. Exactly. I agree.

Why myself am a dick? I didn't have enough, so he carried over. I mean, if I'm him, I carry, you know, I got my four pockets. I sell each one.

Oh, hey, this pocket is available. Four guys walk around in the hands of his pockets? Yeah. Yeah.

I'm in Booth. I'm in Booth. We're all in Booth. I'm all in Booth.

We're all in Booth. We're all in Booth. That'd be amazing. Yes.

Yeah. We're gonna copyright that, please. So he cannot steal that. com.

You could resell them every day. You know? Hourly. You want to rent the booth for anything?

Rent the booth for anything? You want to rent the left pocket booths for one hour, it's going to be $75. Oh, left pocket, $75. Yeah.

Right pocket's a little more expensive. Actually, the right pocket would be less, but it would require more work. Why is that? You got to play a little pocket pool.

That's what it takes. That's what it takes. If you want the freedom, there's a way around everything. It all comes at a cost.

Liga Provada, 10-year anniversario, a savage feast coming to select events. We're not going to get it here, will we? Why? It's a Drew Estate thing.

During the February 24th edition of the Drew Estate Sticks and Sips show on Facebook, the company announced the upcoming release of the Liga Provada, 10-year anniversario, a savage feast, a new event only. That's a JD event thing. I'm fixing your mic for you. Cigar that is scheduled to debut in May.

Yes, it's a jetty thing. That's the one that Greg had asked about the other day. Yeah, savage. The cigar uses the company's feral pig Vitola at five and three-eighths by 60.

Perfecto will only be available as a sales incentive at Drew Estate events that Jonathan Drew attends. Yep, but it's like a Zoom. Oh, the cigar comes packaged in a two-count offense alongside a Liga Bravada. This is probably the one with the pussy juice thing that Jack talked about several weeks ago.

No, that's the, well, that's the Pedro one. The Manifesto? Manifesto. Well, yes, but he said, Jonathan Drew had to give it to you and it tasted like pussies you.

This is the new one. Right. But you can have manifestos with Pedro events. Oh.

Right. So these, every guy's got a thing. Everybody's got a thing now. Yeah.

Oh, wow. The blend remains the same as the Liga Privada 10-year Inversario, which uses a hybrid Connecticut-grown Criojo wrapper, a Mexican San Andreas, Otapa Negro, Altimo Corto Binder. Wow, that sounds amazing. Gotta be a shorter name for that.

Otapa Negro. Mexican San Andreas, Otapa Negro, Altimo, Corto Bander, Pico. Altimo. And fillers from Nicaragua and Pennsylvania.

The latter, a Green River One Sucker Lajero. Oh, I didn't read that before. Wow, they threw the Green River Sucker One in. Did Skip know about this?

Uh-huh, I wonder where they got that idea from. I wonder where they got that. So crazy. So crazy.

It's based at Liga Privada's Unico Series A, another event only released, that the company is retiring, though will remain available via events for the next month or two, according to Jonathan Drew, see, corrections from earlier story, a previous version of the article identified, oh, it doesn't make it, we need to do it anyway. Yeah, we didn't read the first one. We didn't read that first one out of the air. So we got, we just got the second one.

Bam, you gotta go to work. Oh. Bam, you gotta go to work. Who's that?

Bam, you gotta go to work. Bam. Blackworks Studio Hyena is shipping next month. It's kind of like, oh, well, they know how to market cigars, they don't know anything about cigars.

Black Work Studios announced the newest cigar. Hyena will begin shipping to stores next month. Too bad he wasn't close to the mic. It's yet another cigar that will follow a recent trend of Nicaraguan manufacturers working with African Cameroon wrappers, something that isn't historically a commonplace combination.

Underneath the Cameroon wrapper is a Nicaraguan Habano binder and Nicaraguan fillers. It'll be offered in two sizes. Oh yeah, he's really kind of, he's unique. Black Work Studio Corona Gorda, 5x46 for $12.

50. Production is limited to 700 boxes of each size, both of which have a Rebito, Rebito, Rebito? What's a Rebito cap? I have no idea.

Hmm. Oh. I guess I should have kept reading. Yeah.

It's probably defined in there. A shape that looks like a nipple. Oh, it's got a little... S.

and in Europe. They're little nipples. Bam, you gotta go to work. Bam, you gotta go.

Bam, you gotta go to work. Hyena is the latest addition to a Blackworks portfolio. Blackworks portfolio, truly unique cigar that is focused on showcasing a perfect balance between Nicaraguan fillers and the Cameroon wrapper, said James Brown. So now you've worked Saka into this, you've worked Booth and Taranio into your soundboard at this point.

Hyena is an extremely complex and balanced cigar. It is tribute to my wife and many years living in Africa. Oh, Hyena? That's not nice.

That's not nice. Let me take a piss, not a goddamn thing. No, relax, Mr. Suga.

Cigar industry asked Cord to throw an FDA regulation for premium cigars. Take a piss, not a god damn. That fit more right there. His wife is very nice.

It's her anniversary today, actually, so happy anniversary. Happy anniversary. I'm sure they're avid listeners. Yeah.

They just love us. Oh yeah, he's really kind of, he's unique. That's right. See, I don't care if everybody likes the show.

I don't care if everybody likes the show. I don't care if everybody likes the show. I don't care if everybody likes the show. See, I don't care if everybody likes to show.

I have a ball. The cigar industry has court to throw out FDA regulations for premium cigars. Bam, you gotta go to work. Bam, you gotta go.

All right, enough of the money. S. Food and Drug... I gotta watch the timer.

Yeah, but it means nothing. It's the latest in the nearly five-year court battle that started after FDA enacted the deeming regulations the first time the agency introduced the new regulations for cigars, various tobacco products, this lawsuit has produced both wins and losses for the cigar industry. Bam, you got to go to work. Bam, you got to go to work.

All right, we got it. The latest battle is over. Whether FDA acted promptly where it decided to move forward. Blah, blah, blah.

The roots of the plant. It doesn't do anything. Blah, blah, blah. They're just stating that we won't.

Let's see. The filing from last week summarized as four arguments. Okay, yeah, but okay, go ahead. They didn't even update it.

Whether the FDA probably concluded that the use of premium cigars poses a health risk that warrants regulation. Right. Two, whether the FDA has evidence that underage smokers smoke premium cigars anyway, whether the FDA improperly moved the goalposts regarding the health risk questions, or whether the FDA performed a proper cost-benefit analysis, regardless of the final impact of regulations. Right.

But the FDA actually, okay, but the FDA determined what they defined as premium cigars, and they didn't even, they just said, you know, premium cigars, they didn't even go into the definition of what the FDA was, what they stated it was, at least. Right. So that goes to show that they're just kind of like fucking, oh, well, we better do this again. Copy, paste, and fucking send it.

I mean, there were some people that got behind it, which is nice. They just got all that money. They had to do something again. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. We're going to try that again. Now that we've got funding. Oh, yeah.

We just took our $10,000 from the Eddie Tarrazona that went into the PCA. Thank you, and I will submit this. There was a Senate bill introduced to exempt premium cigars from FDA regulation. Yep.

Separate organization. S. Food and Drug Administration. I'm just a Bill.

I'm just a Bill. I'm just a Bill. I'm just a Bill. I'm just a Bill.

I'm just a Bill. Sitting here on Cabo Hill. I used to love Hook School House Rock. It shows.

Senator Marco Rubio is reintroduced to... He's reintroduced. I like him. reintroduced to the Traditional Cigar Manufacturing Small Business Job Prevention Act, a bill that would exempt some cigars from regulation by FDA.

Either Rubio or former Senator Bill Nelson have introduced a bill in the Senate during the last five Congresses. Bill Nelson did. You did. Good old, see, a Dem and a Republican, just so you know.

But they just keep putting the same bill again? How does that work? You put it in and everybody votes? No, I'll pause!

Oh, okay, well, we'll try again later, don't worry about it. You know, the shitty part, here's the reality, and it sucks. The fact of the matter is that if it doesn't affect a lot of people, then no one really wants to address the issue. It's not a concern to anybody.

So because cigar smoking isn't huge, when I say huge, it's not like, you know, 50% of the population smokes cigars, then it's not, nobody's in an uproar or really forcing any issue. It's a small number. Right. Just like anything.

Anything that's not a big deal, they don't really, you know, that doesn't affect the masses. They don't really trigger and press. He has eight co-sponsors now. He does have eight.

Senator John. I don't know if that's up or down from the last time. Senator John Barrasio from Wyoming. Aren't they the ones we discussed last week who says you can't smoke inside?

Yeah, let's stop smoking inside. John Boozman from Arkansas, Tom Cotton from Arkansas, Senator Joni Ertz from Iowa, Senator Lindsey Graham from South Carolina, Senator Jim Enofi from Oklahoma, Senator John Kennedy from Louisiana, and Senator Rick Scott from Florida, all Republicans. Specifically, FDA's definition would not allow for any flavored cigars to be considered premium. In addition, the proposed definition previously used, the other Senate bills would allow for cigars that are made domestically to use a homogenized finder or made with the assistance, look, I'm reading these things for the first time.

I don't pre-read these. Everyone's a spontaneity of the show. This looks good. Yeah, I just read headlines in the first paragraph, and they're like, grab a net.

The premium cigar industry is an iconic staple in Florida's economy, said Rubio. In a press release, far too long, small and family-owned businesses have been facing the threat of regulation that could force many to close their shops. I'm proud to reintroduce this legislation that will provide Florida premium cigar makers that certainly they need to continue their craft. I urge my colleagues to swiftly pass this bill.

Yeah, but they're not. It is highly unlikely that this bill would pass, it says. It is highly unlikely. Let alone Congress as well.

You couldn't get it to pass when you had the fucking House and the Senate and the presidential party. Bills like this serve as an opportunity for the cigar industry to explain the uniqueness to members of the Congress as support for legislatures is then used to show the executive branch, either FDA itself or the White House, that is a congressional support for the exemption. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I mean, how ridiculous is that?

So you're just putting a bill out there so people are aware of it. Right. Hey, just want you to know, smoking, you know, we have a problem with this. We have a problem with this.

We would just like you to know about it. It's over-regulated. FDA's trying to control them, and we're not okay with it. Moving on to other things.

It keeps his supporters and his people that contribute to his re-election campaign happy. Happy. Keep the cigar people happy. Happy, happy, joy, joy.

Hey, come on. I re-induced the bill seven times in the last two years. What do you want? I'm doing the best I can.

I'm trying. I'm doing the best again. You know what I need? I need four more years, seven years, whatever a senator gets.

I need seven more years. 35 years and $7 million. And write. So write me a check, please.

So when I'm out of here, I can say, I don't know. I don't know what happened. Okay, we have two stories from Florida. Love my Florida stories.

Jacksonville, Florida, a bank located blocks away from the Jacksonville Sheriff's Office headquarters, was robbed Monday by a woman in a motorized wheelchair. Authorities. I actually heard about this. The bank robbery was reported about noon at the region's bank branch on Bay Street near Lawrence Street.

How much I got? Police said the woman showed up to discuss an account, but she got into an argument with the teller to escalate it when she threatened to kill everyone in the bank and announced she was robbing the place. So yeah, my bank counsel overdrawn. Okay, you be the banker, you say no.

Uh, no. I'm gonna kill everybody and I want all the money. Okay, here. I'm now robbing the bank.

How much you want? Did she go around in her motorized wheelchair? She got a hundred bucks. Is that what it was?

Yeah. The woman left the bank and she was given some cash and she was taken into custody. That was a hundred dollars. Nearby, a short time later, police said.

Some cash. $100. Yeah, I mean, she's not really that hard to catch up to. Right.

It was close. She was close by. Uh, ma'am. Here they come.

Full speed. Set course for ludicrous speed. Fucking chooop. No weapon was seen during the robbery according to police and no one inside the bank was hurt.

Well, the wheelchair's a weapon. Except one man, she ran over his foot out the door. Ow! Ow!

Alright, and then in Collard County, Florida. Florida, baby. Nine minutes. A couple was caught allegedly stealing lamb and a variety of seafood from a Naples Costco by shoving it in their pants.

Oh. Lucrezia Gentile, 71, Invito Gentile. I hope they were getting like the crab legs, because those things look delicious and they're expensive. 76, part-time Florida residents from Brooklyn, New York.

Oh, but no, hey, we don't blame New York. It's always Florida. Yeah, arrested on Thursday. A witness told Collier County deputies she saw the couple conceal multiple items and leave the store without paying for them.

She said she saw Vito fold a halibut in half and put it in his wife's purse! Crab legs and clams also were placed in the purse. You know what? I don't feel that embarrassed for them.

If they went for the crab legs, the crab legs are expensive. Vito was reportedly seen placing lamb down his pants. Are you happy to see me, or is that lamb in your pants? Well, both.

The couple walked through the Costco, paid for several other items. That's just got to be in the back. They pay for the toilet paper and the large thing of peanut butter. Gotta make it look good.

Gotta make it look good. Nobody's looking, honey. Put the claims in your purse. Devers reported finding the seafood and lamb in Vito's pants in the purse.

The crab legs that they sell are gigantic. They're gigantic. You'd think they'd go down the pant leg, but that was in the purse. Maybe they snapped them.

It must have been a really big purse. Because the crab legs are probably, I feel like they're like two foot. They're huge. 97.

And a hundred of that with the Kramblicks. Costco is pressing charges. Yeah, I'm not surprised. The couple is facing charges of retail petty theft.

Costco's tough, man. I almost lost my shit at Costco. Uh-oh. Yeah, it was pretty rough.

We have a listener of the week. Oh, I only got to tell my story, okay. You want to tell your story? Go ahead.

No, it's fine. Go ahead, we've got seven minutes, please. It's fine. Please.

It's fine, I won't let it go. Tell us your story, Michael. I was trying to… I didn't poop! That was your story.

I was trying to… I didn't poop! I was… And when you go into the self-lane checkout or whatever, which really isn't self-checkout anymore because of the scanner shit, there's two lines. Because you and I used to do the Sam's right here for the shopping. Yeah.

Set everything up so all the barcodes are out on the outside edge. Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, and we're out! Yeah. People are still standing there going, do they have a receipt?

I don't even think they paid. What did they do? So, well, actually, Brittany sets it all up now for the people, and one of the people, like I said to her, is like, "Oh, you spoil me. I can't.

" Oh, I do that all the time. " So, but like, there was a line, there was one line, and there's two lines going, but one line was empty. The people had left. So, a spot had opened up on that left lane.

Right. So, I was going, I crossed over. Holy moly. You thought...

You cut somebody off. I didn't. There was nobody there. Somebody was coming.

Guy pulled up, and as I was crossing over, she said, "Whoa, this is... " Hold on, honey. There's a man coming up now. You cannot cross the line.

" Sorry, Adam, you probably- I can't prove! I'll pee! Is that what she said to you when you walked up? The guy was trying to let me go, too.

" Well, you're very big and angry-looking. I'm like, "No, it's fine. It's fine. " Big and angry-looking most of the time.

I would let you go, too. I feel like more people want to fuck with me now. I don't think so. You would think it'd be the opposite.

These are less people now. Yeah, no. I'm not big enough. You're not big enough?

You need to get fluffier. You broke both the damn chairs! You bought cheap shit chairs. Okay, they're not made for you to lay back and stretch your girthy upper half all the way back to where your head hits the floor.

I should be able to lean back in these chairs. Okay, there's difference between leaning back and laying back where you tried to put your head on the floor. I wasn't putting my head on the floor. With your arms out.

I appreciate you yelling. For God's sakes, Michael. My arms aren't out. You're just being ridiculous.

I don't know about this one because I wasn't here but that one I saw you break it. Your wife even said that you're too big. All right, should we go on to Listener of the Week, Michael? Let's go.

Listener of the Week is Mr. Michael Rosales and I haven't listened to the show and today as we are taping this is actually Mr. Rosales' birthday. It is.

Oh, I'm sorry. You're doing other things over there. I am. You upset me with my chair conversation.

You missed-- I'm shutting down now. You missed-- This is me shutting down. Mr. Rosales' birthday wish from the show.

Mr. Rosales. Yes. Birthday wish.

Happy birthday-- are we gonna sing? No. Did you call and sing? I haven't-- I'm going to.

Oh, alright. I did a nice Facebook post. I saw. Yeah.

Your very best friend. I said one of my best. I think you said the. One of my best.

The. I knew better. I didn't want to hurt your feelings. Not my feelings, Michael.

One of the best. One of my best. Lightweight, heaviest feelings. He's one of my best.

Poor man's living alone now. He doesn't have Uncle Skip to smoke with every afternoon. I'm sure he's very happy. It's quiet there.

It's quiet. He doesn't have to put Fiorella's toys together at the moment. He can go to bed at a reasonable hour. Oh yeah, there's been no four o'clock in the morning smoking cigars on the porch.

I do like how Skip checks on him though with the ring cam to make sure he's still freezing on the porch. He's okay. He's fine. I don't see like the I would have you on a porch frozen.

Yeah, it's going to be okay. All right. That is almost the end of episode 163. Now, coming next is the Steve Saka interview.

The Saka interview. So, where we got all these lovely sound clips. And then we're going to cover some ground on the... Oh, I forgot.

I changed the board. Oh. To maniacal laughter? That one doesn't change.

Oh, you hit it again. Oh, God. Now it's broke. Now you're melting down.

Oh, no. Yeah, hit it again. This was not set up to where you hit it, it'll stop. Whew.

That was tough. Good. All right, now I can do it. Go ahead, go ahead, do it.

Bam, you gotta go to work. And it's kind of like, oh, well, they know how to market cigars. We don't know anything about cigars. Let me take a piss, not a god damn.

A lot of his good comments, you talked over. Well, that, it's Steve Sakat. What do you want me to do? You have to get your fucking words in.

Oh, yeah. He's, uh, he's really kind of, uh, he's unique. Yeah. I mean, if you don't like that one in the bam, I might save those two.

If you don't, if you don't interject, I mean, you know, shit, right. You have to get your word in. You gotta wait, bam, you gotta go to work, bam, you gotta go to work, Michael. All right.

Well, we gotta go to get, get to work on this page. Yes. Cause we have a movie meeting directly. We do have a movie meeting after this.

So, you know, we're going to go to the movies. We're kind of a big deal. Then we're going to have our own IMDB page. IMDB.

Oh, I got a cameo update. I know how to do the cameo thing now. Oh, yeah. But they want you to have like 400,000 followers on something.

So we could use your Instagram. Yeah. Cigar Hustler. Uh-huh.

Because you have like 30,000. That's the one we got the most on. Hmm. How many followers do you have on Podbean?

Yeah, but they give you a choice ones to pick from. Podbean wasn't one of the options. Oh. It's like Twitter, Facebook, Instagram.

400,000. Well, it says 400K is the baseline. Sort of, yeah. Tough.

But, I mean, there's like a monkey that you can get to do things, so I don't think the monkey has that many followers. You think the monkey has 400K? I don't know. I saw that they added Ric Flair.

Woo! Woo! Yeah, that's pretty amazing. I'm excited about that.

All right. All right, make sure you clip out that part of the phone call. What, the phone call? Oh.

Yeah, all right. Okay, we gotta go. Bye. Bye.

So what's up, man? We're here with Mr. Steve Sakka this week. He's out traveling.

So the poor guy just walks in the fucking door, and I'm like, "Come on, let's go. We're gonna record. " No talking without the microphones. Don't even let me get a sip of water.

Don't let me light a cigar. Don't let me take a piss. Not a goddamn thing. No.

It's like, bam, you gotta go to work. That's it. Dance, monkey, dance. That's it.

I was gonna say dance monkey. That's what happens when you're, you know, the king of marketing, you know? Am I supposed to take that as a, is that a compliment or an offensive? Of course.

It's not offensive. How is it offensive? Well, I'll tell you how it would be offensive. Tell me.

Okay. Like certain cigar people, when you say they're the king of marketing, it's kind of like, oh, well, they know how to market cigars. They don't know anything about tobacco. They don't know anything about cigars.

It's kind of like when you kind of say something like, oh yeah, he's really kind of, he's unique. Well, I mean, I wouldn't take either as an insult. But, you know, I think that there's a big difference between somebody who makes a good cigar and doesn't know how to market it Yeah, and I'll tell you, you know, part of the marketing, I'm just who I am, is who I be, and so, when I'm doing these things, I always know it's marketing, and everything you do is marketing, right? Of course.

You walk in the room, the first time you shake someone's hand, you're making an impression, but I don't have like a, oh, this is the public Steve Saka, and this is the private Steve Saka. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's the same lousy Steve Sakka in both segments. Right.

You know what I mean? Same guy either way. And I think one of the reasons why I do well is because I am my customer. Right.

I am a cigar smoker. I am genuinely a cigar geek. I mean, how many big league manufacturers that roll around still with a box? You know what I mean?

Right. With stickers all over it. No, that's true. I mean, you live and breathe the industry.

The industry. Yeah, I definitely am that. You know? So, what are you going to get me in trouble with?

What are we talking about? Well, I mean, a lot's going on. For one, you're one of the only guys that's out traveling right now. Mm-hmm.

It's like him, Jack, and Terrence. I mean, yeah. That's really about it. Yeah, Terrence is on the road.

Yeah. Laffy just hit the right. I think people are starting to move now. A little bit.

But you also went to Nicaragua. Oh, yeah, that's right. I had no choice. Because here's the thing.

Everything that I released last year was work that I did in 2019. Now, look, I'm not sitting at the table and rolling every cigar that goes in every box, right? But I do do all the front end work, I do actually look at all the tobacco, buy stuff, sort stuff, figure out all the initial blends, you know, go through all of that. And because I hadn't been back to Nika since March of last year, there's been like zero development of anything.

- Yeah, nothing gets done unless you're there. - Nothing gets done. - You can send as many fucking emails as you want. - Right, and they can send as many samples in Ziploc bags.

- Right, send more samples, we get emails. - But that's not how I like to do things. - Right. - It's not why I started a new company.

I started a new company so I could do things the way I wanted to do it. I knew that if I didn't get back to Nicaragua, I was basically not gonna really have anything fresh for the people that like my cigars this year. And so, I had to get back there as soon as physically possible, and so that was challenge number one. Challenge number two is, I normally am going down every month, except the month of December, and I'm normally going down for about a week of every month, except typically I'll end up spending two weeks in January, and then like two weeks, about six weeks before the trade show every year.

, I was having to open boxes and cut open cigars, and I destroyed probably this year, I think I destroyed somewhere around probably between 12,000 and 13,000 cigars in my warehouse. I was just doing the quality control checks, and it's expensive. That's expensive, especially when it comes all the way over here. Right, I spent the money to ship it, I spent the money to import it, I paid the tax, I paid the S-chip, and I paid the factory when I, well, it depended on what the problem was.

I had a problem in September that I made them eat because it was just too big a problem. It was definitely a big, it wasn't just me being an asshole, it was them really fucking up in a way that... If you found something wrong, how could you fix that? Because you're pulling from stock you'd already received.

And I rarely do find something right, but, you know, I found something in September, like, we didn't ship any, we didn't ship, I don't want to say what brands, because I want people to think, "Oh my God, I don't want to grab that brand," but we had a brand that there was a problem with, and it was a moisture problem, and it had to do with the fact that the cigars were rolled when it was really rainy, and then when they wicked down, they ended up a little spongy, and you know, my cigars, I like them to be really firm and dense and heavy, you know, I want the draw to be good, but I don't like spongy cigars. Spongy cigars burn too fast like a wick. - Yeah. - So we had a problem and basically we had to really reject almost an entire shipment of an entire brand.

- Damn, wow. - And we had to destroy it and my factory partners, the deal with who I work with, they all know what an asshole I am. - Right, right. - And there is a sock of tax on all of my product.

- So it's, okay, it's already incorporated. - Right, it's already incorporated. It's built into the pricing, I don't do the normal, hey, no, I want it to be a nickel cheaper, hey, it needs to be that, no, we figure out the prices, boom, boom, boom, and then I almost always pay them more than what they even ask for, because I know what I'm going to be like, and they know what I'm going to be like, and then when something like this happens, well, all that extra cash that I've been paying you for the last three years, guess what, I'm cashing in on some of it now. - Right.

- 'Cause this shit, this shit ain't going out the door, this shit's going into the dumpster. That's the way this is working. - The soccer tax is coming online now, because the soccer tax. - And, you know, and that's part of the gig, but honestly, I don't wanna do that, it's a lot of hassle.

- Right, yeah. - I'd rather, it's much easier to be there, physically see with my eyes, cut, light, taste, draw, boom, boom, boom. And go, okay, here we got a problem, here we don't have a problem, boom. It's just way better and more economical and easier than me opening, opening, finish good.

But you still got to jump on it. I mean, you're all the way up in New England, right? You got to fly all the way down there. It's a two and a half hour drive.

Where the fuck do you stay when you go there? I actually stay at my good friend Gustavo Cura's house. Okay, you stay at Gus's house? Stay at Gus's house.

That's the way to go. Yeah, I've been staying there for years. Stay at Gustavo. Oh, Gus.

Yeah, you're staying there. Yeah, Gus. And a good thing about staying there. Gus runs Noxon.

Yeah, Gus runs, well, not really. Well, yeah. Gus runs Procenic. Right.

Okay, so Gus is a tobacco man. Yeah. Yeah, he's the, he is, Gus is Oliva Tobacco Company's number one guy in Nicaragua, and Gus hasn't left Nicaragua. He's been there this whole time.

He's been there the whole, since COVID started. He's been, he's been down there 'cause he can't, 'cause he knows if he leaves, he maybe can't come back, and he's responsible for, you know, millions and millions and millions and dollars of tobacco, and, and I like staying at Gus's house because Gus is a douchebag. No, that's wrong, that's not true. Gus is a dick.

There's a difference. There's a huge difference. Gus and me get along really well. So we're kind of boys.

Is there a suck attack for staying at his house, too? Yeah. Well, you know what? He doesn't ask for it, but I always make sure I have some extra scotch in the bag.

I bring him some good coffee. Show appreciation. He likes dark chocolate, stuff that you can't get in Nicaragua. And look, I'm his mule back.

So like this last trip back, I brought all sorts of drugs for his wife, I bought this like pet shampoo, like they have this pet shampoo down in Latin America and Central America, that's like the most amazing pet shoe shampoo ever, it's got this like antibacterial thing in it, and like when you wash your dog, not only does it like clear up all skin issues with your dog, but your dog actually smells fresh for like seven to eight days, it was literally washed that morning, the stuff is incredible, it's crazy. So now we're going to go down there looking for this fucking dog shampoo. But of course in the United States, you can't buy it because someone might drink it. Yeah, it's not PETA approved or FDA approved.

You've got idiots putting Gorilla Glue in their hair, tie pods. Who would have thought that Gorilla Glue isn't for the hair? Yeah, now you have to put, don't put in your hair on the packaging. But they have this wicked, amazing pet shampoo that you can't import to the United States.

So I'm always smuggling pet shampoo in my bag. What is this in his bag? Shampoo. I'm gonna go down at Miami Cusp, I'm gonna be the pet shampoo smuggler.

Sir, come here. What is this? What is all this stuff? What is all this?

Please tell us. It says pet shampoo. We're gonna have to cut this open. And I'll tell you the other thing that's great about staying at Gus's house.

Because Gus sells to everybody, and so he's seeing all the tobacco buyers from all the major companies, right? Everybody comes in to be there. I get to be party to a lot of conversations and you'll learn a lot about a lot of things that you otherwise never would have the opportunity because once we get to night, as you know, there isn't a lot to do at Esteli, so you're basically sitting around and you're drinking scotch, you're drinking bourbon, you're smoking cigars, and you're just talking, and so, you know, it's really cool that I get to, you know, talk to the head buyer of Altidus and talk to the head buyer at STG, and when, you know, Fuentes people come in to select the Ecuador Habano and all that stuff, you know. All of that, the Ecuador Sumatran, so you get to learn a lot being there all the time, so I like staying at Gus's place, and he treats me really good, even though he is a dick.

You're a dick, Gus, but I love you, brother. It's like Michael Jordan in Space Jams, you know, like they built the basketball court and they had all the all-stars there playing with them and stuff, he learned the ins and outs of everything, you know, it's pretty much the same link, right? Yeah, it's a good one. All right, so we'll make this one more thing real brief, and then we'll let you settle in and relax, and then you don't have to dance anymore.

So you went to the Great Smoke. Yes. And we had the explosion on the server. Yes.

You did a whole post. Yes. Abe did a whole post as well. I mean, like, but that shit kind of happens.

You know what I mean? Like, I understand why people get pissed off or whatever the case may be, but I mean, if you get your server to break down, you fucking, you know. You know, look, and he knew it was going to break. Of course.

And he has a great, he has a great web server. It's really over, it's like, it's like, he said it was good for 99% of the time. Right. 9% of it.

Right. I mean, and, and I know people are like, this is part of what's going wrong with our culture right now. Everyone's so spoiled. Right.

By instant delivery and free shipping from Amazon. You ship boxes to customers. Yep. You know how much this costs.

Yeah. We're not getting that right. We're not getting that deal. I mean, it just doesn't exist, but they just, they get so spoiled that, well, I don't understand why this, you know what I mean?

Well, guess what? That's like a multi-billion dollar company, and this is, yeah, is he a big retailer? He's a big retailer, but he's not, he's not even famous or like JR or one of those guys. I mean, I haven't even seen the show yet.

Yeah. Well, because I had that lunch event, and I had to rush from the lunch event to go do the studio appearance, and I had to rush from the studio appearance to go do the Red Meat Lovers dinner that night, and ever since then, I've been, you know... Running and gunning. Running and gunning, exactly.

And so I haven't even seen it. So all, I don't actually even know how my, I mean, I know I'm there, I'm doing my show. You lived it, but I didn't see it, you don't know the numbers. You don't know how it feels, you don't know how it looks to somebody from the outside, you know, did it, but I had a great experience, I thought it was really an unbelievable undertaking, I don't even understand, when you think about the fact that Abe Dabana at Smoke Inn, who yes, one of the best retailers in the country, yes, one of the best, one of the best, one of the, one of the, one of the best retailers, one of the, one of the, no, I refer to him, he says it all the time.

The fact that they let him do that, and one of the mega box companies, or one of the big manufacturers didn't do something like that. I mean, everybody's just doing these dopey Zoom calls. Boom, boom, boom. Yeah, no, you gotta give it to the guy, man.

That was just unbelievable. I was stunned. I heard the comedians kind of were a little bit eh. Yeah, I mean, what can you expect?

You know? But I think it was kind of like, you know, it was just unbelievable. I was stunned. I heard the comedians kind of were a little bit eh.

Yeah, I mean, what can you expect, you know? But I think it was kind of like, It's a quick first go around, and so getting back to that other thing, when I saw that negativity, and I'm like, I could fix that for my product. I don't know about the other manufacturers, I don't know what limits they had on tobacco, what limits they had on production, they may not, but I knew that for that particular blend, I have enough of that Costa Rica Marone that I could have made enough for everybody to buy one bundle. right okay i know i could but you also you gotta understand you know when you're planning these things you don't know what the demand is going to be right and you're making something exclusive right then what happens when it doesn't all sell right yeah then you're like i mean there's here take 20 here take 20 000 of these oh you only sold five okay uh i guess 15 mark as you well know it happens all the time yep it happens all the time and then you're stuck with this so and he's like okay there's 1500 ticket holders right they have six manufacturers they each have an exclusive right you know how many of these exclusives are actually going to be bought you have no idea so you're throwing you're just kind of sticking your finger in the air and kind of winging it right right and you're making that decision you know six months right seven eight months prior it was the same situation we have with red meat lovers with him right like when we We had to pull the trigger on Red Meat Lovers Production for 2020's release.

We had to make the decision in March. Right. Well, you guys were around in March. I mean, we didn't even know.

We didn't know who was gonna be able to know what. Can we sell cigars? Can we sell cigars? Can we sell cigars?

Are there gonna be bodies stacked in the streets? I mean, we had no clues. Do zombies smoke cigars? Right.

I think so. Right. And so, you know, but I knew that I could fix that. Right.

And so, and luckily Abe was like, okay, you know what? You know what, if you can, I'm willing to do it too, and here's the thing, it's gonna become available very soon, and it's only gonna be available to ticket holders, 'cause that was the original deal, the ticket holders were the ones who were gonna have a shot at the exclusives, so it's not gonna be open to everybody, you had to have a ticket, and we'll find out, maybe we'll get orders for three more, you know what I mean? Yeah, I doubt that. Yeah, I mean, who even knows what the numbers, but I will say this, I'm making, just so you guys know, I'm actually gonna make a video about this later today, but all you motherfuckers out there that want it, I told Abe he has to charge you when you order it, because I'm making these cigars specifically for this purpose, for those customers, that's it, I got no way to resell them to anybody else, so none of this, oh, I wanna buy it, I'm gonna buy it, and then when it gets delivered, when it gets delivered four months later, they're like, yeah.

Oh, well, I'm the one I'm the one I'm the one I'm the one I'm the one. I told Abe, you got to collect the cash or I'm not doing it. Yeah, pre-sale them, collect the money now. It's maybe the way it is because there's just too much risk.

" That's already sold. That's already sold. " It's like, you son of a bitch. Right.

And it's like, you just like told eight people, no, no, because of that promise. And so it's, you never know how many. Retail's hard. Everything about our business is hard.

Yeah, that's fair. That's very, that's very fair. There's, there's, there's, there's no, there's no easy ride anywhere. No, that's a, that's a true statement without question.

All right. So that, I mean, that was it. I just wanted to cover it to say, hi, you know, have you on here and we, you know, we got to fit you in. We had to, you know, talk about a couple of awesome topics, you know?

That's it, I'm off the hook. That's it. Unless there's something else you want to talk about. Fuck, I could care less right now.

I'm exhausted, man. Look at my eyes. You look tired. I have a quick question.

You made some posts about it was going to be hard to get out of Nika at the end. You came back before the cutoff. Right, here's what happened. So, I planned the trip.

You had to get the COVID test to go down. Right. It's not the big deal getting the COVID test. The problem is that there's one airline that's flying out of Miami, I'm from Miami, and they're disorganized, and it's Avianca.

And when you land in Nika, the results from your COVID tests are not allowed to be older than 72 hours. Okay, that's achievable. The problem is Avianca Airlines needs the result of your test 36 hours before your flight. Ooh, quite the window there.

Oh, wow. And you have to send them it during business hours. Holy shit. You need to be 36 hours before your flight, during business hours, but your results not be older than 72 hours when you land.

It gives you such a tiny window of when you can get this test done, so you then have to go to one of those rapid clinics, which, you know, you pay 200 to 11, there's one in Miami you pay $1,100 to, but I paid $350, if I remember right, for the test, for you to get the result quick enough in the window, because, of course, the clinics, they're not 24/7 either, so you've got to coordinate the clinic's time with the airline's time and the other things, so it's really tough to do, but it's doable. So, I'm going to Nika, I'm doing all this, no problem, and then, when I'm in Nicaragua, our State Department announces that, oh, by the way, nobody after January 26th, or after January 25th, can come back in the United States, unless they have a negative COVID test, and they made it where you had to have an antigen test. Right, yeah, they added the thing on. Right, and the antigen test, 70% of the countries in the world don't even have the antigen test.

Right. Okay. It doesn't exist for that. My wife and I were going to go to Mexico, but you can't get the test to get back out.

Right. Once you're there. Right. So there was no way to get the test, Danica.

Now, so what ended up happening is everybody that was out of the country, not Nicaragua, the whole wide world. Right. That was in one of these, you know, seven out of 10 countries, they were now all scrambling to change their tickets. So the airlines, they wouldn't even let you change your ticket.

It was buy a new ticket. So, what ended up happening was, it was like, all of a sudden, it was like an auction. So, I paid for a one-way ticket to come back from Miami to Managua, $2,400, times two, because I had my son with me, and I gotta tell you, I was lucky to get the ticket, because about two hours later, there were no tickets to even be had. And then, it became a problem here in the States, because everybody that was coming into all the international destination airports, they also had to change their domestic flights.

Oh, yeah, Trey, you can get back to Miami. Right, right, because now I'm back in Miami five days earlier, so now, so they weren't any better than the crappy Bianca people, they also instantly gouged, so this flight to Nicaragua and back in ticket prices between John and I, I don't know the exact number, but probably well over 8K. Right, I don't want to, you know, I mean, carry the one, but Sin Compromise was now $85 a stick. Yeah, I mean, it's just so crazy.

It'll be the special release next week. Dunbarton Tobacco raises prices, extremely. So, in Nicaragua, they don't really do COVID testing much. Yeah.

They just basically... I can't imagine. You have it, you don't have it. " Well, look, they had a lot of pneumonia deaths in 2020.

Right, right. Now, what I will say, though, in Nicaragua, as soon as you start to show symptoms of COVID... They shoot you. They instantly put you on the cocktail.

They put you on the steroids for your lungs, they put you on the parasite drug, they put you on the evil chloroquine Trump drug, they put you on the Z-Pak, and they put you on the 100 milligram aspirin, like everybody, like boom, and the thing is, most people in Nika really got it, but they got better really quick, because they got the cocktail, the cocktail that politically doesn't work, amazingly, it seems to work in Central America, I don't know why. K. or to France or Spain. There aren't that many countries that were requiring you to have the test.

Well, there are, but there weren't that many Nicaraguans that were flying to those countries that were requiring you to have the test. So the clinic that they have could only process like 25 of these rapid tests a day. Holy shit. And the average Avianca flight coming out has like 130 passengers, and they all have to go through Miami, so the problem is now, they're trying to scale up the clinic size in Managua to handle the load, and I'm waiting to get word, as soon as they can handle the load, I will make the trip back down there, because the other option is if you fly into Nicaragua, you've got to fly out of Nicaragua to a country like Mexico, so I can fly to Mexico City, but I get a COVID test in Mexico City, to fly back to Mexico City.

" Now I'm stuck in a city, in a country that I know nobody, I know nothing. If I catch COVID in Managua, I know plenty of doctors, I know hospitals, I have political connections. You know, I'd much rather be sick in a country where I know people than, you know, a country like Mexico City where I know nobody. So I'm just waiting, and I think it's gonna be about another two weeks is what they're saying.

They're gonna have the clinic up. And again, honestly, I don't even know if they would really, if they're even going to really test, because I think if you were positive in Nicaragua, and you're getting on a plane, I think they're just going to stamp you. Oh yeah, they're going to be happy to you. Oh yeah, you're fine.

Yep. Enjoy your trip. Adios, amigos. Yeah, you're good, you're good.

Put on your mask. Put on your mask. Hold your breath as you get on the plane, sir. Go coffee.

This guy's fine. He's fine. He's fine. But I'm hoping- He's on a stretcher, but he's okay.

Just put him on. I'm hoping that, I'm hoping I'm going to be able to make my, I'm hoping that by the time we get to March, In March, which I guess is what, just a week? Just a week, just right around the corner, man. I'm hoping I can get back onto my normal routine schedule of visiting all the time, because I really need to.

It's what I need to do. I think how healthy you'll be, though, you're getting tested once a month, though. It's amazing. Q-tip jammed up my brain pan.

You know what? It isn't that bad. In fact, I think a lot of people that whine about it, I think they need to downgrade their buttercup-ness, because it's not like that bad. I mean, come on.

Really? You know what I think it is? They're not rooting around up there. I think it's just decades of the retro hill.

It's so easy for you. It's like, you know, there's no problem there. There's no sinuses left. Exactly.

It's like a big cavern up there. There we go. A lot of room in this guy. Look at this.

Check this out. It doesn't hurt him. He's unaffected. Are you done?

I was about to say something I don't want to say. He can take so many inches. It's like a hot dog down a nostril hallway. I think we should leave it on that note.

That sounds good. Steve, thanks so much for coming on. Thanks for taking the time. My pleasure, guys.

Let's go hang out. We'll have a little smoke and catch up. All right. All right, guys.

Thanks. The Cigar Hustlers podcast, its owners and its sponsors take no responsibility for the opinions or statements made by the talk show host or their guest. Statements or show topics are not necessarily the beliefs of Mike & Mike Productions or the podcast providers, and opinions between talk show hosts may differ. It is not our intention to libel, incite, or hurt anyone's feelings.

We invite you to write the show's host, Mike Szczefan Kiewicz, with any feedback or suggestions that you have for their shows. These broadcasts are presented and made public as entertainment in the hope that they will be entertaining to the audience. This has been a Cigar Hustlers podcast, a Mike and Mike production. m.

for all new episodes. Hi, I'm doing, I'm Husto-E-Raw. Yeah, we just don't have to do a single podcast ever again, ever. I'm good, Mike and Mike.

How are you guys doing? - The Hojo de... - Hojo! It's the Hojo!

- You didn't even let him fuck it up all the way. - I couldn't get past Hojo! - I don't even have to try it. - He's not even going to try it.

- We're going to cover a lot of ground here, Mike. - All right. - Try to keep up. - That's a sign of a good podcast.

- It'd be like four cigars when I walked in the door. - All right, end this. Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike squared.

Show Notes

This week we start the series on our miss adventures in the Movie Business!!  Replay of the Steve Saka interview and more industry news!