A Cigar Hustlers Podcast Episode 311 Booty Patrol

Transcript

OK, the camera's in.

What's that?

Welcome to the Cigar Hustlers

podcast, Episode 311 The Number

One Cigar Pass.

Christmas.

Tree.

We have a tree here too.

All right, that's those two

guys.

And I'm Phil.

So grab your favorite smoke, sit

back and join us for another

exciting episode of Cigar

Hustlers Podcast.

So that did work.

I'm not sure if the camera wants

it was giving us a problem.

It's on.

MM you didn't start your clock,

silly goose.

I got so excited with The Tree.

Yeah, welcome to the Cigars for

Podcast.

He's the most handsome tree

you're the most.

Handsome tree we have Phil.

Oh, thank you.

They're the best tree.

Thank you.

Just heads up, we're still

proudly sponsored free, but a

massive shout out to our amazing

Patreons, patrons of the

Patreon.

Thank you to Thanks to your

unwavering support, we're able

to deliver unfiltered, unbiased

opinions and all things cigar

and personalities in the cigar

world.

Your backing makes it possible

for us to keep it real for our

listeners.

Cheers to you.

If you'd like to become a

Patreon Patreon member, go to

www.patreon.com and then in the

little search bar, put a Cigar

Hustlers podcast.

It'll pop right up.

Pick the level you want.

Sign up tip, Don't pick level

one.

You don't get anything.

We get.

We get. $5 Yeah, if you just

want to help just to help then.

If you want a video, it's the

15.

I think it's the $15.

One or the audio's?

Like the audio is 10.

Hi, Michael.

Hello.

How are you?

I see you through the forest.

Yeah, I can.

I can see half of you.

Right.

We have this lovely tree here.

Yes.

What's going on I?

Don't know we're wearing these

microphones.

Yeah.

Well, if you want me to jump

right into that, I can jump

right into that.

That's.

Oh, or you could tell us about

your lovely event you just had

down at Smoke on the Water in

Weston, FL.

If you let's start, let's do

this first.

Then why did you ask me?

Well, you said the mics, you

said this.

Isn't part of the mics.

No, this is part of the mics,

yeah.

Oh, all right, fine.

Whatever.

I don't care.

Go ahead.

So we're doing giveaways all

every month long.

Yeah, all month long for the

month of December for Roma.

Craft.

It's like it's Christmas.

It's like our hustling.

And every time you grab a box,

you get to.

Grab a box of Roma Craft.

Of Roma Craft, Yes, thank you,

thank you for for always

clarifying that.

Yes, yes, yes, you're going.

To be entered to win, I don't

even think you have the ashtray

on me.

I should have brought the

ashtray.

Oh yeah, there last week, yeah.

So we have a custom made ashtray

that we're giving away a.

Roma Craft Ash.

Tray A custom made Roma Craft

ashtray that we're giving.

Away with a little leaves.

On and you get an entry in when

you purchase a box.

Very festive looking.

It is very festive looking and

every week we're gonna give away

one of these cool Go Rock Roma

packs for everybody who enters.

Very sought after in the Roma

craft world.

Highly sought after, Highly

highly sought after so.

The patch and everything the

black on black so.

I I I.

It doesn't have the cigars in

it.

Segundo.

Oh.

Show us what's in the box.

What's in the pack?

It does have cigars in it.

Oh, and now we we both have

mics.

Oh, oh look.

I'm not holding a little mic

either.

Oh, the chair looks lovely

though.

Look.

At that lovely tree.

Oh, nice.

Alright, so hey, listen, I'm

gonna announce the winner for

this Go Rock bag.

I mean, I don't even have to do

a random.org thing to be honest.

OK, there's only been one.

There's.

Been one one person, 01 person.

I had one one entry, one box

purchase of Roma Craft.

Is it Justin for last?

Week.

It's not Justin.

Oh, OK.

I have one box entry.

I have one box entry.

I'm over here.

You're over here.

That's, that's Phil.

Phil, The Christmas.

Tree.

He's a Christmas tree.

Till Christmas.

Hey, look, look.

We even have a Chet sighting.

Oh, look at that.

Look at that.

OK.

So hey, listen.

Yes, congratulations 2 to

Francis Saletto.

Francis, you know what?

Today is my Francis anniversary

on Facebook.

Oh, happy anniversary.

Anniversary.

You and.

Francis, I got you that.

That's.

I I yeah, he got.

You that that is from me.

So congratulations I.

I fucked up and deleted the

other orders by mistake.

You are still entered to win the

$320 question Ashtray Robocraft

ashtray that I had had made

that's custom built.

So then it's true, if you win

weekly, you do not get the

exiled from the Asher.

Yeah, he still entered to win.

As of right now, he has 100%

chance to win because there's

been nobody else enters.

You don't.

You give me that for my

anniversary.

If anybody else wants to enter,

just grab a box on

cigarhousser.com from a Craft

product only Palmer.

You want to get in this with me?

Not fun though.

Split one with you, Phil.

I mean and.

We got a 5050.

Chance Ronnie's trying to call

me.

All right.

So, hey, that's it.

That's all you got to do.

Congratulations, Francis.

We're gonna, we're gonna get

back to our podcast now.

Congratulations.

So say bye, Mr. Palmer.

Bye Mr. Palmer.

Say bye, Chet.

Bye, Mr. Palmer.

Say Say bye, Phil.

Christmas Tree, Phil.

Goodbye.

I love Christmas tree, Phil.

I love Christmas tree Phil too.

That's how we got the tree.

The place we got the mask had a

minimum order and the tree put

us over the top.

And then and then I got Ronnie

calling me.

Let's see.

Let's see if he's what he's got

to.

Say I.

Don't want to talk to Ronnie

today.

Why not?

Why was he so long?

He's trying to connect me to an

iPad right now.

So long.

Trying to connect me to an iPad,

a random iPad.

There's a iPad, right?

There's several iPads in this

room it.

Just says iPad connection

unsuccessful.

Big shocker.

Don't connect to the iPad.

I'm not connected to the iPad, I

just hit the button.

Back I need to hit the hit the

button over.

Here, go ahead.

I'm connected.

I'm connected.

Oh, and let's say hit unpair.

Let's see if he yells at me.

I guess we don't need the mics

anymore.

We put these away

Usually starts with you

motherfucker or something.

Yeah, let me guess.

You like Robocraft now?

You charge my credit card.

Do you ship a week later?

Hey, you're podcasting with us

right now.

We shipped on Tuesday.

Yeah, we're still on Tuesday.

You like Robocraft?

I'm going to repeat that again.

You like Robocraft?

You charge my card.

You ship a week later.

That Yeah, that's nice, because

if you like Robocraft right now,

you're entered in.

Oh, nice.

Thank you for the plug.

Oh my God, your shit shipped

last week.

What are you talking about

Tuesday?

You're so angry.

I'm going to call Robocraft for

our tracking number.

Go go.

Go ahead, go ahead.

Ask for that guy that doesn't

answer the phone.

What's the guy that doesn't

answer the phone?

What's his?

Name.

We're doing well.

How are you, Jason?

Ask for Jason.

Ask for Jason.

He's probably in a meeting.

Sales guy that doesn't like to

answer the phone, Yeah.

You.

Know I got two people that are

very excited about their SDC

2020 twos.

Oh yeah, I heard good things.

So when are you getting there?

And unfortunately, you know,

unfortunately, I had sort of

like a premature ejaculation

moment.

I actually put them up for sale

and sold a bunch.

Yeah, and and now people are

waiting for that warm and fuzzy

feeling where that sweet sauce

touches the back of the pan.

Yeah, and unfortunately I don't

have anything.

I think we talked about this,

your warm and fuzzy feeling.

It should happen any day now.

At this point.

It's Monday.

What the fuck?

I'll probably be there tomorrow

or Wednesday.

How's your show going about

what's going on today?

We haven't really covered much,

We just did a just started.

We just started our raffle.

And then gave away a price.

And then I figured you were

angry, so I'd probably answer

the phone.

No.

Rumor has it you can it.

Raffles are a joke.

You should not give away

anything like.

Cigars.

Oh, that was.

Not give away any chops.

Nothing Chotsky.

Skip is never white.

For a.

SWAG right?

Yeah, the white one had spoken.

Everybody shared the message

with me.

The wise one was spoken.

Spoken OK.

Does not like cigar swag.

Well, we're giving a giveaway

away anyways, so you know, I

don't.

It's kind of funny because we

got him from.

Him I I hope my best friend gets

mad at you for doing that.

He won't get mad.

That's a shameless plug for my

dear friend, best friend Skip

Martin.

Your best friend's skip Martin.

By far did.

You just call me angry one.

We're going to do, we're going

to do the H 99 lands Arrow for

the Patreon, by the way, Ronnie.

The Phineas Cage.

And it's 13 grams, just for the

record on weight, the.

Cigar 13g, yeah.

Yeah, We weigh all our stuff.

We weigh it all make sure it's

legit.

Yeah.

So how's that?

Well, I'm sorry, Sir, that your

SB-22 has not arrived.

I just want you to know that you

were a priority and we took care

of your order expeditiously so.

Dude, I like that sexy voice.

You should do that all the time.

Do you talk like that to

Brittany when you guys are on

the phone?

Absolutely 100.

Percent He's very violent,

according to Miss Brittany the.

Sometimes she likes violence.

That's that's oh.

By the way, I love I loved her

on the show last week.

She was amazing.

She's always a hit.

Everybody loves her.

She does amazing.

She does amazing.

No fucks giving.

She teed off on you.

That was special.

Yeah, that's called, you know.

But you tried to hold your own.

I respected that like you tried

to hold your own.

Yeah, you know, you got to It's

chestnut checkers, right?

It's chestnut checkers.

Yep, but.

But I'm I'm sure you're still

not unpacking your bag when you

get home.

No, I'm still not.

She takes care of that.

She's the best.

Throw it randomly.

Around the best didn't.

She's the game.

I'd be.

I'd be careful what you get for

lunch though these days I

wouldn't just bite it to

anything.

I'd have, like cheddar my taste

at first.

I I had my chicken today.

It was delicious.

Oh, we can announce it at this

point.

Ched is back in Cigar Hustler

for a limited time.

Yeah, the Chet the Chet

Rebellion is coming back on

Thursdays and Fridays.

Making a he's.

Like a limited edition cigar?

We're going to call Chet.

Like Chet Limit Tata when he

comes in.

Chet.

Ex Placebo.

Chet Reserva.

Yeah.

He's always limited.

Limited on time.

You know, I I like that.

Actually, we should.

He's an Ellie in himself.

He.

Is an Ellie in himself?

He's like trying.

To.

Hear him and he's picks, I mean.

If you want to say something,

oh.

He knows I.

Love him?

Yeah.

So we're not going to use

DESERVA because he's not calm or

reserved.

So there's that.

All right.

Well, thank you for having me on

your show.

Thank you so much.

You're.

Almost a regular as Britney.

Yeah, you're almost as regular

as Britney, so go to Secreto for

SBCS 'cause you know he's gonna

get him eventually.

He's gonna have him soon.

Soon.

Very soon.

Very soon.

All right, all right.

Love you too, buddy.

All right.

Bye, bye, bye take.

Care bye.

Bye.

All right, Ronnie, I think.

Your wife, he knows what time we

do the show on Monday.

He's like, oh, it's 3:00.

No, no, no.

He didn't know we were on the

podcast.

He started off out the gate,

fucking angry and agitated.

And he's like, what?

And then he owned it.

Yes, that's exactly you're

right.

He he did not care.

He he reiterated, to let you

know.

I do not care.

So.

So how did the event go?

The event went great, man.

It was fantastic.

Dude.

Smoke on the Water is such a

great place.

Yeah, you know, Joaquin is

fantastic.

Larry's fantastic.

Danny's fantastic.

You know, I met David and I met

Jeff, the two guys that are in

the humidor.

There's a gentleman named Andres

who was the Barbax.

What's his name?

Andres.

Andres.

He he introduced himself, Andres

and then he tried speaking to me

in Spanish and I kinda knew what

he was saying, right, But I got

a little nervous.

You.

Just go.

It's Andre.

I'm like, I don't know.

There's no acid in I.

Don't know.

I don't know.

What are you saying?

I don't know.

Because you're rolled the R he

thought you were in.

Yeah, I said.

Oh, hello.

Right, so.

Do we need need to announce that

the Pedro episode will not be

seen?

Well, I guess I just did.

Yeah, yeah, the Pedro episode is

not going to see the light of

day.

The only.

Marked in the vault.

The only portion of Pedro's

episodes that you see will be

this.

Hold on.

I'll tell you right now what it

will look like.

Oh, God, he's not getting to it.

Where did you go?

Just so you understand what kind

of excitement Pedro had.

Oh my goodness.

We'll never find it ever again.

It's gone.

Apparently it's even going off

the board.

Can you like I'm watching you

hit these buttons and is

handmade and that's not even the

one I wanted.

Sigur Hassler is the goddamn

fucking best.

Yes, that is definitely the one

I wanted.

It right there.

'Cause that shows you the tempo

though, that things were made

at.

So yeah, I guess the Pedro thing

isn't happening.

It's done.

It's over what you.

Sent me 3999 What, send you a

copy?

The Pedro That's not enough

money.

Per per person, sure.

It has.

It would have to self destruct

and they couldn't record it ever

again.

Oh, I'll do like Amazon does

when you when you download a

movie, you get 48 hours and

it's.

Gone.

I will do that.

Forever gone.

Forever gone.

What do they record on their

phone?

Yeah.

Can you record on your phone?

Well, I did.

How does that?

Work.

I don't know how it works big.

Can you record it on your phone?

It's called.

Pirating.

No, no pirating.

Oh, record.

I mean, download it and then

record it.

Oh, I don't know.

But yeah, I guess that's called

pirating.

Well, you heard it.

You Heard It Here 1st 299. 3999.

Well, I could tell you this that

we did do a podcast at Oh, yes.

Yes, he still has that on his

laptop.

And I gotta tell you, Phil does

or.

Boost does.

Remember I missed you, buddy.

Yeah, it was tough.

Huh.

You're like my.

I saw the photo and you're

sitting across from the

gentleman, so I figured, OK,

there's no video.

Yeah, there's video.

No, there's not.

What?

Do you mean it didn't capture

everything?

There's no didn't capture

anything.

There's no video at all.

There's one still photo.

The Wi-Fi?

No, it's not just one still

photo, It's a video.

But it goes.

And then you.

Oh, it looked like a still

photo.

And then it moves again.

Where was the camera shooting

you guys from the side from?

Yeah.

From the.

Front from the front.

So so do we have video or no?

No, it's very choppy.

No, you don't have video.

Wow, I missed you.

I missed you.

See, this is what happens.

You're not allowed to go on

vacation.

No, I I get to.

No, no.

It's unacceptable.

It was like the stallion didn't

have his goat in the barn.

To keep me, you know, keep me at

Bay.

You know?

I need that well.

I have to do better scheduling

next.

Phil just goes ahead and monkey

fucks his way through all this

stuff.

I mean we looked to the side and

and we and I said that didn't

record and it said you know

stopped recording and he did

like a oh.

What do you want me to do?

Pay attention while it's

recording.

I don't think it would have

mattered.

Maybe.

He's only capable of doing

either audio or video because

Dana's show had video but no

audio.

I got it, got it.

And then I heard he left to play

some mess.

Yeah, and all the cameras were

left on and unplugged, so if

they go off, they're in the

thing.

I know.

It bound his hand.

Rook it, Rook it.

He's angry.

It's like they all finished and

then he got up and left with

them.

It's like, all right, let's go.

And you forgot to turn the back

lights on on their show, so it

doesn't even look good.

You said it was all set up.

I don't leave the up lights on

for three days.

What do you want me to do?

You said it was all set up.

Oh my God.

You couldn't walk in and go, oh,

the lights aren't on.

You said go in.

Well, you know what?

Do the show.

These lights were off too.

I guess I'm lucky he didn't

shoot it in the dark.

I love this.

I love this.

You know what's funny?

I mean, you did kind of fuck up.

I'm not going to lie.

How did I fuck up?

You did make one mistake.

What was the mistake?

You always tell him that he

doesn't have to clean up his

shit.

Just because I'm here.

If I'm not here, then he has to

clean.

I know that's a that's a fuck up

for you.

You should just tell him.

Make sure you pick up your shit

before you fucking leave.

Every time to do the stuff I

would normally have.

Done.

Right, right.

Right.

I'm just saying.

So I should have told him to

make sure you hit the record

button.

Listen, make sure you hit the

stop button.

Now you're getting jaded, yes.

Here's what I need.

You to do what?

Here's what I need.

You to do Angry Palmer when we

leave today, right?

And you look at me and you look

at him instead of saying don't

worry about it, I got it.

You say.

Hey you 2 fucking idiots.

Make sure you clean up your mess

before you go.

You know, I don't have to talk

like this on the other show.

They both chip in without even

asking a question.

I pick up all my shit before I

you.

Pick up all your personal stuff.

Yes, Yes, that's fine.

I pick up my area.

Hold on, time out.

No, he does.

He does.

What he didn't do was he didn't

turn the cameras off.

So they were all dead.

And then there was a half drink

tea, Tea thing on the table,

dirty ashtrays and Dana Norley

picks up her money at the end of

her show.

But she didn't even bet there

was quarters all over the table.

Yeah, that's exactly Chet.

What should Chet?

Listen, you have a you have a

shit show or the Chet and Palmer

show?

Yes.

Let me ask you.

I obviously need some pointers

here.

What should I?

What can I do better to make

sure that my friend Palmer feels

good about?

It no, no I try.

To do.

Yeah, any.

Ash that's on the tables.

I like to wipe it clean.

You clean all the ash off the

table.

Just right on the floor, right

on.

The.

Floor.

OK, perfect.

That's the first thing.

Anything else?

Mikey does that without even

putting it on.

What you do when I'm here, it's

what you do if I'm not here.

Yeah, we use General 74.

OK, that's.

About the way let's.

Just do I No, I shut my side of

the.

You shut your cameras off.

Brandon shuts off the other

cameras.

So you want me to shut this

camera off?

Well.

The LED lights.

Oh, the he does.

He does a lot.

Yeah, he does a lot.

Alright, OK, so I'm just

reviewing here, I want to make

sure.

It's what you have to do when

I'm not.

Here, see, here's the thing.

If I'm not here, you don't act

like I'm still here.

How you do anything is how you

do everything, brother.

I'm a fucking.

I'm gonna shut down my area.

I'm gonna shut down my area.

Well, the the the lights are on

your side for the tree.

Too.

I don't want that.

That's fine.

I'll take that.

I'll take care of that too.

I don't want.

To wish that's a battery.

I don't want you to be like you

know.

Well, I expect you to do these

things when you're not here.

I'm gonna do them all the time.

I'm gonna do them all the

fucking.

Time.

Well, if I'm not here, does

nobody shut this camera off,

then 'cause I'll do that because

I don't.

Like, I don't really like to do

anything without you here, so I

don't fucking know.

Well, I'm talking about if

you're if someone's helping on

someone else's show.

Chet, go ahead I I.

Don't touch the.

Camera Chet doesn't touch the

no.

Brandon does.

He's the engineer.

Yeah.

B Dog.

B dog.

Well, I mean, listen, I'm going

to take care of my stuff, OK?

I'm going to shut down these

lights back here.

I'm going to turn the air up to

74.

I'm going to wipe everything off

on the floor.

I'm going to shut this camera

off.

I got you.

I'm gonna and I'm gonna even

turn off this tree.

Yeah, turn off the tree.

When I turn off, the tree lights

on your side.

I got you all.

Right.

There's a little switch on the

top.

I got you.

Sniffle button hit your sniffle.

Button when you when you need

to.

I I I work on that but look I'm

hitting it right now it's not

working.

It's not working Go.

Backwards because they had to be

reset, so you have my SO.

You can turn it off.

That's OK.

Just leave it.

Don't worry, man.

I don't need this.

I don't have AI.

Don't.

Have a sniffle either.

So, so the event went great.

The event went great.

I had some friends come up.

Sean Wilson came up.

Dude, I gotta tell you when?

A football guy show up?

No, no, no, Phil was not.

Yeah, Phil was probably upset.

Very upset, yeah.

He showed his his anger by

sleeping.

Oh, in the cartoon from.

It's just a dream at this point,

I.

Say, forget it.

You know what?

I'm just gonna check out.

He's just like, yeah, like, OK.

And then, like, I would roll

down, so I'd roll down the

window to ash my cigar or

whatever, and it would kind of

startle him and he'd wake up and

he'd be like, hey, you need me

to stay up or something?

I was like, you know, I know

you're tired or whatever.

And I'm like, no, I got it.

He goes, OK, back down, back to

bed, back to bed.

Let me pull up to a truck

pulling another truck.

And get.

Real close and then start

screaming.

He thinks That truck coming.

Out.

I scared the piss out of Palmer

one day when when we were in

Philly and we were driving and

he passed out in the passenger

seat and I made sure it was

buckled, but I slammed on the

brakes.

I go.

And he's like.

I don't doubt you didn't do it,

but I don't.

Remember.

Oh my God, it was amazing.

All I remember is just hitting

that thing in Georgia.

You hit the thing in Georgia.

No, I think you were driving.

No, you were driving.

Yeah, you were driving.

It was in the rain.

You couldn't see.

Yeah, we couldn't see a thing.

We don't even know what it was.

Could have been a car or a tank

or something.

And that was the last time you

said we'll ever take your car

in.

Right.

Well, we we've got to rip the

front end off.

Yeah, it's still fine, so it.

Still has tape on it, by the

way.

I gotta, I gotta tell you one

thing about the event.

First of all, Joaquin is an

amazing, amazing retailer.

He does a great job in that

human art for sure.

Sean Wilson.

Get hot in here.

Every time I talk to this

fucking guy, I feel like I need

to level up.

Sean Wilson It was great.

Yeah.

Oh, was it again?

All the photos.

Yeah, Sean.

OK.

We met him in.

I don't know if you met him in

Texas.

You.

I don't think you were there.

I don't think you might have

went with Chet.

Chet Man show.

He's on Weasel team six.

He's always.

So when this guy travels for an

event, and I apologize if I'm

putting you on blash on, but

when this guy travels for an

event, this is what he does.

He goes to the event.

He, you know, he his wife books

his tickets for him.

He flies in, he does the event

right, he gets the next flight

out when he's done for the next

morning, right?

And what he does, He goes to the

airport.

He brings a yoga mat, He goes to

sleep there.

He wakes up fucking on the

plane.

Oh wow, that's a good idea.

I'm thinking, look, man, is

that?

What we're going to start doing

though, look.

That's that occasion they you

know, that is some next level

shit.

And why am I spending 300

fucking dollars in a in a in a

hotel to sleep there for four

fucking hours?

I just need to bring a fucking.

Yoga mat.

I'd just stay awake.

It would be.

It wouldn't be the first time I

spent the night in an airport.

Like why?

Why am I doing this?

This is so dumb he.

Just he'd have the red light

more and he did that.

Drop the fucking car off make.

It when I get home.

I'll just drop the fucking car

off, right?

Bring my own yoga mat.

Oh, it's fine with me that I

have no anxiety about where you

haven't left in time.

Yeah, we just fucking go to the

airport.

I'll just crash for four.

Fucking I'll just wake you up

when it's time.

When he told me that I'm like,

God damn you are on next.

Finds an MBA.

Next fucking level, bro.

Trash.

You have that camp pillow that

you fluff through the air and it

blows up.

It's made out of nylon.

What there's a There's a camping

pillow that's made out of nylon.

It looks like a it looks like a

bag, like you would keep your

yoga mat in.

And then when you go to use it,

you take it and you just sort of

fluff it through the air and it

fills it up and then you

crumple.

The end You have a air pillow.

That sounds amazing.

What the fuck?

What am I doing here?

I feel like we can.

Do you're doing the right thing?

I feel like I can do this.

You're doing the You're doing

the right thing, dude.

How much money would I save on

hotel fees just by fucking

crushing that?

Man, whatever the hotel is. 300

clips.

Wait, you're going from a

special hotel with special

pillows and blankets to now

sleeping on the floor in a

dirty?

Airport.

I'm going to fuck it.

Yeah, I'm in.

I'm going to.

I'm moving to fuck it.

We weren't even going to stay in

the hotel that spelled like

Lysol.

We didn't, right?

You had to change up though,

right?

You think the airport is going

to be any different?

I don't give a fuck.

There's going to be wet farts

for the other people sleeping

next to us.

Do you drop off the car?

Find an empty gate.

You set up camp.

That sounds amazing.

That sounds amazing.

I feel like we can do this.

I can't wait for this first

story.

It'll never happen again.

Why won't it happen?

Because I no.

It will happen one time, dude,

but it will never happen again.

Dude, Sean is the master of

this.

I need to just take my notes and

it.

Gives him an extra $300 to spend

on cigars.

Yeah, that's brilliant.

We're not buying cigars.

I know we're not.

Trying to increase my EBITDA.

The director of social media

probably should not have to pay

for his flight either anymore.

I'm sorry.

Director of social media?

Yeah, he should not have to pay

for his flight.

You don't have to come.

OK, then it doesn't get covered

social media.

How the fuck am I?

I can't fuck you.

Just save $300.00 on the hotel.

The director of social media?

That's Cigar Hustler.

Why?

And then then Cigar Hustler.

I thought it was everything in.

Oh, you were doing.

You are doing everything.

You are doing everything.

It's true.

So you want you want you want

you.

That's where you're you're.

You're already gunning for no.

I was just asking.

Airline fees.

I'm just asking.

I mean, we're gonna save the

money in the hotel, I mean.

We're gonna send you Frontier

like you guys did that one time.

Oh, I don't care.

I mean, you can get earlier, you

get there earlier to the second.

Well, I'll just find a good

place to sleep for that night.

I'll just, you know, check out

spots and find a good location.

You know what?

This airline's out of business.

Michael.

Nobody will be at this gate.

We can go here.

Perfect So.

So I have a question from a

listener for you.

Apparently he's asked several

times.

He will not answer the question.

Oh no.

So they would like to know if

you had to pick one brand owner

to fight by his side, who would

you choose?

If I had to like.

Another brand owner like there

was.

Gonna be I.

Don't think he picked.

I think we talked about this

before.

Well then just pick the same 11

brand.

Owner to fight.

I think the the question before

was a zombie thing.

To fight by my like, to have my

back, yes.

I don't know, man.

The epic dude's pretty jacked as

the guy.

I like that As far as a brand is

concerned, Brand owner.

Brand owner, 'cause you're, you

know, you're a brand owner.

Right.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I like, I can't think of his

name.

Greg, I think from Epic.

I don't know.

Dean.

Dean.

That's him.

Dean.

Dean.

That makes more sense.

He's a cop.

He used to be a cop.

Oh, alright, well then he's.

Relatively big like that's Yeah,

that'd be the guy.

Dean Private epic.

Yeah, I mean, who else I mean.

Thank you for the question, User

955.

That was Jason Hawkins, yeah.

Not Justin.

Not Justin, not.

His brother.

But he did mention his brother

loves the show, too.

His brother's also a fan.

Also a fan?

Yes.

Yes.

Yeah, I think it'd be Dean.

I mean any of the guys got some

some know how you know some

size.

OK.

Yeah, I mean that'd be.

There you go, Justin.

Wouldn't be.

Jason, whoever which other

brother was.

I mean, maybe Matt Booth.

I guess he's a killer Marine.

He's a Marine, right?

He might fight harder.

Oh, he's.

Because we're friends.

Well, he'd be, you know, tearing

off Dicks and sticking fingers

in butts.

So we shall die.

I got you.

But when he goes to the gym, I

always hear some lame ass excuse

about some.

Something always hurts.

He's like, oh, my arm has been

bothering me.

I'm like, so what'd you do for

legs?

It's like, oh, I just didn't go

like, yeah, that's the problem.

That's what he wants you though.

If the arm's broken, you go

through the legs.

He wants you to think, you know

you could pray on him.

I got a good story for you, if

you're ready.

About my booth.

No.

I'm praying on people.

No.

But I coached basketball on

Friday.

By yourself.

You're the head coach.

No, I'm the assistant coach.

By yourself.

No, not by myself.

You got in a fight.

Without the guy that was a head

coach.

The other head coach lost his

fucking mind.

Not my head coach.

The other other.

Team Yeah man, And you had to

hit him.

No, no.

Dude, wait a second.

Time out.

I already You had to go coach

the other team.

No.

No, he lost his mind between the

guy went crazy and started

yelling.

I should have.

I should have went and coached

the other team.

I would have helped those kids.

What did he do and?

Then he would have completed

our, you know, thing We always.

Had so we played this, so we

played this team, right?

So we played this team last

week, two weeks ago, and we won

by three.

It was close game and our kids

played like complete shit.

Nobody was doing their jobs.

They weren't.

They were playing on top of the

they were covered.

They weren't being in the

positions where they needed to

be.

People weren't looking for

passes.

People were taking shots that

were ridiculous and they weren't

in the positions where they need

to be for rebounds, recoveries

and what to do when they had

those rebounds.

So we won.

We barely won.

We won by three.

So we had that conversation with

the kids, that's we had

practice, said, hey, listen.

Oh, last week you won by three.

Yeah, two weeks ago I said, hey,

listen, you won by three.

You should have won by 20.

It was this game shouldn't have

even been close.

You guys are way more talented

than what you were.

You guys weren't listening to

us.

It was like we didn't practice

last week.

You guys got kind of in your

heads and whatever.

So here's what we're going to

do.

We're going to do our jobs.

We're going to fix this.

Here's what you're going to do

defensively because there's two

simple plays that they do that.

You guys, if you're in your

right positions, they're not

going to be able to make those

shots and you're going to play

well, right?

So we're up by 25, right, going

into the fourth quarter.

We're smoking these kids, right?

One of our kids gets, gets the

ball passed to him.

He's at close to the top of the

key, wide open.

I said take your shot, take your

shot.

And he does right and it goes

in.

OK, Coach loses his mind.

You're telling him to take a

three-point shot?

That's ridiculous.

You're hurting the demeanor of

our kids and all of these other

things.

And I'm like.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Doesn't like getting beat.

Like, I'm trying to raise the

confidence of the kid to take a

shot when he's wide open.

Like, what does that have to do

with the the demeanor of your

kids?

Like you're supposed to be there

for your kids when things go

sideways.

You need your job to.

Right.

You need to build them up and

let's say, hey, listen,

sometimes you lose, right?

You know.

Every game there's a winner.

Every game, there's a loser.

Well, I always like to tell the

kids, hey, listen, we either win

or we learn.

What did we do wrong?

No lose learn.

L is for learn.

Right.

What do we What do we learn?

How do we adapt?

We're we're learners.

This week, where were learners?

Where were the mistakes made?

Right, right.

You know, I mean, yeah, you need

to hit record on the video.

Like, that's all right.

You know, so, so maybe, like,

we're getting close to the end

of the game or whatever, or

we're in the fourth quarter,

whatever.

And I walk over there, 'cause he

keeps chirping.

And I'm like, listen, man, like,

dude, we are not trying to beat

your kids down.

Well, I'm building my kids.

Up You that guy.

Yeah, that you were that.

Guy I was.

Yeah, that's what I was.

I was.

It doesn't matter.

It doesn't matter because

everybody freaks out, right?

I start walking over there and

everybody's like, whoa.

Whoa, get him.

Calm down.

Get him.

Calm down.

They know you from football.

I'm like, I'm like I'm looking

around, I'm like I am calm and

this guy needs some help.

They're yelling.

Fight.

Fight.

Fight.

Like, this dude is lost.

Start Bobby Nyan with the chairs

and stuff.

Like, you know, this guy, you

know, looked, we won by three.

This guy thought he was coming

in and they were going to win.

That's what happened.

And instead it was the opposite

where they got smoked.

So now he's losing.

His baby smoked.

I love it.

He's losing his mind.

And I'm like, look, man, you

gotta be able to learn to say

the right things to these kids.

Say hey, look, I say the I say

to the kids every single game.

Hey, if you win or you lose, do

your parents love you more,

less, or the same And the

answer's the same, right?

OK, so the the pressure.

Basketball.

Yeah, the the pressure's off,

man.

The pressure is off.

Go have fun.

Everything.

Nothing else matters.

Your parents are still gonna

love you.

OK, how did the guy take it?

He got kicked out.

I didn't get to have the full

conversation with them because I

got pulled away and told to sit

down.

Brittany.

Brittany told you to sit down?

No.

Who told you to sit down?

Where is I?

So I wraps the fucking all of it

like there everybody starts

losing their mind.

Like calm down.

I'm like, I'm fucking calm, like

you're about to get get uncalm

here in a second if somebody

doesn't fucking let go in my

arm, so.

The ref had hold of your arm,

no?

Oh man, there was an assault.

Brittany had hold of your arm,

so I went.

And so the game, the game hands

still.

Brittany was involved in this

the.

The game?

Hands.

No, we shook everybody's hands.

Except him.

No, I'm gonna shake his hand.

Slapped it away.

Dude, Brittany was involved and.

If he didn't shake my hand, I

would have haunted him down,

said.

Hey man, good game.

You know, we're we're shaking

hands, dude.

We're gonna work this out.

We are going.

We're gonna map Booth, right?

Here, we're gonna figure this

out.

God damn it.

Yeah.

We're gonna be friends, this is.

Invite him up on the show.

Yeah.

I would love to.

I'd love to talk to you.

Guys, so how did?

You.

I would love to help the fucking

guy.

I'm not the head coach.

I'm the assistant coach, so I'd

love to help the guy.

So we're going to leave him

carrying Teddy while walking out

and he's over there.

I go and shake out in the

parking.

I shake his thing.

I'm like, listen, man, we're not

the coaches that are trying to

destroy your kids.

But you got to fucking.

I didn't say fucking.

You got to build your kids up,

right?

Like I bring lollipops into

these games.

I make sure that everybody.

Gets lolly.

Oh, you brought the lawyer I

told you about the.

Lollipop.

I bring dumb dumps, he goes.

That's not what it's all about.

Like an orange guy.

I'm like, what is it?

What is it?

All he.

Likes to win.

He likes the oranges.

Yeah, of course he likes well,

everybody likes to win.

Yeah, but he really likes to win

well.

He needs to coach better.

Does he have an assistant coach?

Let's call him up.

He needs to work on his kids.

Look, dude, I got to tell you,

when I was coaching these

Patriots with this team, we we

were two and O and then we lost

four in a row.

I mean, we were a complete mess.

I didn't lose my mind.

I laughed and said, yo, you guys

are so much better than this.

Check getting on the other room

so we can call.

You guys are so much better than

this.

I don't even know what the fuck

he's talking about, but I'm

about to beat the shit out of a

Christmas tree.

The The tree's really tight, so.

That's like a Grinch thing to

do.

You shouldn't do that.

I don't give a fuck.

I'm a Scrooge the fuck out of

this room.

There's no Grinch that says I

hate trees either.

I look for that, yeah.

Oh yeah.

I hate Christmas.

He doesn't say I hate trees.

Yeah, he hates the Who's the

Who's in Whoville.

So that was my fun and

excitement for Friday before I

got to go downtown or.

So when he quits, are you going

to coach that team?

No, they're in a different

school.

But I do want to help the guy.

Like, I would totally sit the

guy down and have a conversation

with him.

Like look man.

Find out where he practices and

go.

I might.

Can I come and bring camera?

I might do that like I'm not

here, Sir.

So because I'm in shape, my

'cause I take care of myself,

I'm instantly fucking

considered.

Oh, God, you're intimidating.

You're intimidating.

I told you.

You know.

Am I?

Doing anything?

You have a tank top on.

No, I had my youth sports.

Catholic youth sports.

Yellow.

Fucking.

With the big cross on the front.

Maybe wear a priest uniform or

something.

I'm gonna maybe I'm gonna

fucking, I'm gonna have brainy

vinyl on the back, you know,

nice guy on the back or

something like I'm.

Not angry.

I'm not angry, that's.

Perfect.

I'm big, not angry.

Just just fit.

I don't take steroids.

I'm fit, not angry.

There you go.

And my brother's fine.

And what, my brother?

'S fine.

My brother's fine.

He's not here.

He's fine.

He's not here.

He's fine.

He's a little upset upstairs

this morning.

I don't know what happened.

You left.

Like, no, I I'm busy.

I can't stay.

All right?

Is that it?

It's time for Phil Fun's facts.

I think that was it.

What else happened?

I went to Missouri for a giant.

Yeah, let's talk about.

That How did the gingerbread

house go?

I got I got second.

You got second, they wouldn't

give you first.

Well, my my grown Adrian's

nephew is an engineer, and he

put a thatched roof on his and

a.

Thatched roof.

Yeah, he cut.

Pieces off a Christmas tree that

was behind him and he thatched.

The He whipped it together.

Wait a SEC.

Wait a SEC.

How was the judging?

Who judged it?

It was just everybody agreed I

use cinnamon sticks.

He made a log cabin out of his

with pretzel sticks.

Oh, it.

Doesn't count.

That's not the same.

It's not a gingerbread house.

A log cabin is not a gingerbread

house.

You should have been dequeued.

Well, I gingerbread.

I log cabin.

Mine too, but I use the cinnamon

steaks.

Somewhere also dequeued.

So who was third?

Who was third?

I don't know.

All the rest of them were the

kids just spray painting shit.

Out of here, yeah.

I mean, God forbid we should

have given it to one of the

kids, right?

Well, it it was just everybody

there.

Not like we won a prize.

Well, yours is the best.

This is bad there.

Well, you know, we're going to

give you second because, you

know, we know that you're new

here and this is a thing and you

know so, but.

I mean, there was like 75 people

there.

It was ridiculous.

Did anybody get in a fight?

Nope.

Are you going back next year?

I would imagine unless something

happens to me now and then I.

Feel like you better work that?

Out so.

Well, make sure you let us know

the day way far in advance.

Yeah, if you can get a if you

can get the date locked in so I

don't do a fucking event

somewhere else on that weekend

then.

Oh, well, I can put you on the

family calendar like you keep

you gonna do with me on your

family calendar.

OK.

All right, I'll add.

'Cause there's things that are

coming up.

There are things that are coming

up.

I've got a baby.

I got a grandchild being born

soon.

You're gonna have to get us a

date.

It's in March.

Like a hard day.

It's in March.

Well, I mean the, I mean, you

can have the date that they say,

but you know, there's a window

of opportunity.

There, if it passes 6:00 AM, you

need to take the shot.

Oh, I don't think I'm going to

the bird, but I'll have to watch

the dogs.

I'm not going to that.

Will I just stand around?

You're on dog detail.

Well, I'll stay home with, stay

home with my dogs.

Oh, OK, right.

You know what?

I gotta be honest, I fucking

love having Chet in this room

because I'm seeing his

expressions and shit.

He's not saying nothing, but I'm

like.

Yeah, and I can't see him.

He's behind me.

I just want to give him a hug.

I'm like, yes.

I've just yes.

I offered to set up a mic for

him.

He wasn't a.

No, this is perfect Chetnas.

We're on the same page and I'm

and I'm seeing, I'm seeing the

expressions and shit and I'm

just like, oh, it's like my own

private TV show.

I love it.

I fucking love it.

All right, let's get on to this

this Christmas tree, who I'm

about to beat the shit out of as

fun facts.

Wow.

Welcome.

The Cigar Hustlers podcast

feature Phil's fun facts.

Hello, it's A trees.

Facts.

People.

All right to watch cigars.

Yeah.

We smoke cigars.

We could make a tree.

Facts.

That's some Christmas tree.

Facts.

That's he's a Christmas tree.

All right, cigars were once

banned in Turkey because someone

used one to spark a political

debate that got too heated.

I guess they got mad.

Someone burned the Turkey.

It was heated, so they sparked

and they got heated and it.

Was terrible.

That was absolutely terrible,

it.

Was a little late, Turkey was.

Turkey was the country.

It just happened to work out

that way.

I get it.

It's still a true fact.

All the facts are true.

Yeah, they're true.

Amazing, amazing 2 minutes of my

life I won't get back.

Yeah, yeah.

It's very thick.

You stop making faces behind.

Me.

You got to turn up the filter.

If it's louder, it picks up on

camera.

We had that problem last week.

Does it?

Yes.

The engineer for the Chet Palmer

show noticed he could hear it in

his headphone.

So he turned.

He got up and turned it down.

Turned it off.

Really turned it down.

Yeah.

Wow, that guy's next level.

He is.

He's really good.

B.

Dog's next.

Level B.

Dog's next level from the four

quarters of the world.

All the cigar industry news you

could possibly need.

The Cigar Hustler Podcast report

with Mike too. the US Court of

Appeals for the District of

Columbia has unveiled the

schedule for the next step of

the Cigar Association of America

versus United States Food and

Drug Administration.

The seven-year lawsuit filed by

three cigar trade groups against

the US Food and Drug

Administration deeming

regulations.

So the Court of Appeals is

ordered the following schedule

for briefs.

Now these are just when they

have to submit the paperwork.

These are not dates when they

will actually go over.

Yeah, we can.

You can pick a date and then

they cannot acknowledge that

date.

Right.

Well, these are the dates that

the court has chosen.

And then you can say, oh, that

won't work for me.

I'm doing my.

Well, you have to have the

paperwork in by that date, so

your paperwork deadlines, so

they're all in January, so then.

2024.

Yeah, 20 January 16th is the

appellate's brief.

The then the appendix for the

brief is due, also due on the

16th and then the appellate's

brief or the Appella's brief

February 15th and then the

appellant's reply brief is March

7th.

It.

Should have been a lawyer.

Ah.

Think of the money, mate.

Look at.

This I just heard.

Ka ching, Ka ching.

These deadlines all pertain to

paperwork and not a day when

parties will argue the case in

front of a three judge panel.

But Mahata's August 2023 ruling

determined the form of remedy.

The judge had already decided in

July of 22 that the FDA erred

when considering how to regulate

premium cigars.

Specifically, He found the new

agency ignored comments that

show the premium cigars.

Large, unflavored cigars were

not used in the same way as

their smaller, oftentimes

flavored counterparts.

So they did.

They are not complaining about

the premium cigar definition, so

that will stand.

Oh, great.

Yeah.

Esteban Carrera announces a

price increase for 2024.

See.

Here's what's happening.

Yes.

You're getting these price

increases earlier than before,

right?

Because you have the PCA coming

out in March instead of July.

So they're saying, oh, turn of

the year, prices are going up.

Right, so they get them all in

before the PCA.

Yeah, probably get mine in

before the end of the PCA.

Do you wanna guess how much

there is?

Their increase, Yes, 7%.

But they did 25 to $0.50 per

cigar.

Well, that's more than that's

probably.

That's probably about right.

It's probably about 5%, five,

five to 10% depending.

Gay Perdolo informs retailers

their price increase for 2024.

Oh.

You wanna guess theirs?

I would say about 7%. $0.25 per

cigar It seems to be the going

rate.

Later, so that's 5%.

Yes, while the eighth line will

be going up $0.10 per cigar.

So the 25 centers are the

Perdomo Double Age, the Perdomo

20th, the Perdomo Reserve 10th

Anniversary Habano Bourbon

Barrel Age, Perdomo Lot 23.

Oh sorry, Jay.

And the Perdomo Humidified bags

Perdomo Amincio 70.

That's the big one.

The net effect to consumers will

vary, as many states impose

their tobacco tax, so it it

it'll vary by state.

Obviously.

Black Label is announcing their

price increase for 23.

I'm starting to see a repeat

here, yeah.

Black Label trading companies

announced it will be

implementing a price increase in

2024 as it seeks to keep up with

increasing costs that have been

absorbed by the company over the

past four years.

OK, let's see.

Where is there at including

Black?

They're not.

Oh, here we go.

OK, they have a percent. 7%

eight fucking close.

Pretty close.

Pretty close.

Cassaday Monte Cristo is closing

the Webster, TX location at the

end of December.

Yeah, that thing was set up for

failure off the rip.

It was in a terrible spot.

Yeah, Webster's kind of a weird

town, to put some It's not a big

city, is it?

It's.

It still could have worked, it's

just that where they picked it

didn't make sense.

In the Houston suburb of

Webster, TX, announced that it

will be closing at the end of

the month.

The store did not provide a

reason for the closure.

Yeah, it didn't make any money.

Yeah, that.

Why are we closing?

We appreciate your limited

support.

Well, we're not making no money,

so we're close.

We're.

Closing Cigars International

plans a Pittsburgh area store.

Oh, oh, that's interesting.

Cigars International, whose

headquarters and roots are in

eastern Pennsylvania, is heading

across the state for the

company's newest superstore

location.

Specifically, it will be in

South Fayette Township, small

suburb located 10 miles

southwest of Pittsburgh.

The companies purchased land in

Newberry Market, located

approximately 10 miles from the

Pittsburgh International

Airport.

That's smart.

Pittsburgh got a few.

A few really good shops too, so

they're not going to like that

too.

Sarah Santos, president of

Cigars International, told

Cigars Podcast that the company

plans on opening the store in

the second-half of 2024.

Santos said the new store would

be similar to the companies

recent superstore locations in

Texas and Florida mean it will

have a large walk in humidor and

expansive bar and patio.

Why the fuck would you open it

in the first quarter of 2024?

And it's freezing up there,

right?

Nobody.

'S buying shit then.

Super cold.

And the way those things are all

opened, it would be freezing in

their own.

I just wish this thing wouldn't

tunnel on me.

I'm getting getting ahead of

myself on the Patreon.

So Scandinavian Tobacco

announced it last year, the

parent company of cigars in

National, that they are adding

six to eight stores by the end

of 2025.

South Fayette would be the 4th

new location since an

announcement was made following

opens in Conroe and Katy, TX,

both in the Houston area.

Oh, might be right there.

The other one and planned a

store in Jacksonville that is

now slated to open also in 2020.

About.

That.

Luciano Cigars to release an A

cigar called Underrated in

January.

Underrated.

Luciano will be kicking off 2024

with a new cigar lining that is

called Underrated, which the

company says comes from the fact

that all their cigars are not

rated well.

Is this a made-up story?

Well, the story is true.

Wow.

Some of the details may be, you

know, artistic license.

The process of creating the

unexpected from the overlooked

is what they're saying

interesting.

The blend features a Mexican San

Andreas rapper, Nicaraguan

binder, and then a unique filler

that contains Connecticut

Broadleaf and Ecuadorian HVA

leaves, both of which are

generally used as rappers

alongside those tobaccos, Medio

tiempo.

Did I say that right?

Medio tiempo.

Medio Tiempo from Nicaragua

Pueblo Nuevo region leaves

leaves that come from the very

top of the tobacco plant and and

cover coveted for their distinct

flavor profile.

Oh my God, This particular batch

of Medio Tiempo is unique.

Or, having come out of the loose

field, Luciano took from someone

earlier the plan due to the

heavy rains during the 202122

crop year that necessitated a

unique fermentation process with

lower temperatures in a longer

time and they pilons.

It's delightfully sweet and

bold, like a fruit and meat

charcuterie tray.

Underrated.

It's not just a cigar, but a

statement.

The company wrote an approach

that he's going to call the

flavor dynamic, both candied and

rich.

Further described as being

medium, full in strength with a

robust body that captivates

without overwhelming.

There's a bunch of different

sizes.

After months of seeing Luciano

experimenting with these

tobaccos, I was in awe when he

gave me a mystery to smoke at a

factory in Nicaragua last

summer, said Ed Trevino, VP of

sales for Luciano Cigars.

I was in awe.

And a press release his cigars

attribute to Luciano's

imagination.

His ingenious use of high

quality leaves and non

traditional roles brings forth

the unparalleled sensory

journey, providing that

magnificence often lies

unnoticed.

The cigars are produced at

Luciano.

You're.

Telling me it took nine years to

get acknowledged.

Produced at the Luciano cigar

factory.

Absolutely.

Nicaragua.

That's the one with the banner

over the other name that that

was called before you see the

factory.

Anyway, the Florida story A

Florida driver was taken in

custody after deputies found him

driving around and a truck

labeled Booty Patrol.

According to the I heard about

county, this is a while ago.

Booty Patrol.

Well, no, he just got nabbed

again.

He's been nabbed several times.

OK, yeah, it looks like it.

It looks like a.

Border Patrol, which we'll get

into that in just a minute.

Booty patrol.

In an incident report, deputies

said they spotted the truck at

the mosaic area on October 29th.

Apparently it's a beach and the

vehicle had red and blue

flashing lights attached to the

grill turned on.

They didn't do.

That believing the truck was a

law enforced vehicle, the

deputies went over to find out

what was going on.

Though they prompted the truck

and turned its lights off and

speed away.

So as they pulled up, the guy

got in the car.

The Booty patrol is on the Move

Booty Patrol's trial.

Believing the truck was a law

enforced vehicle, the deputies

went over here.

Oh, that was a wow.

The paint job looked familiar to

Customs and Border Patrol

vehicle.

It was evident that the truck

wasn't affiliated with the law

enforcement, so deputies gave

chase after the truck and pulled

it over, the report shows.

Investigators said they made

contact with the driver,

identified as Gabrielle Luviano,

not Luciano.

Gabriel.

Gabriel.

Yeah, it almost sounded like a

girl was definitely a guy.

Who told them he believed it was

legal to have police lights on

his vehicle.

Oh, I thought I was OK.

So they issued him a citation

for displaying prohibited lights

on the vehicle.

The county's clerk office shows

that the $113.00 fine was paid.

However, deputies reviewed

footage from the traffic stop.

Then they realized that the

truck was nearly identical to a

Border Patrol vehicle.

They didn't catch that at first.

That's federal.

Yes, except for the phrase the

phrase Booty Patrol being

stamped in place of Border

Patrol and the rest, the arrest

report states.

Deputies said they discovered

that Luviano had several other

run hints with the law

enforcement due to his truck and

he had a TikTok account on which

he featured his truck.

He uses vehicle for publicity

and.

Please tell us.

Follows for followers and for

the fame, the arrest report

reads.

Watching the video I saw he has

a hashtag listed for immigration

ICE, hashtag immigration hashtag

ICE and talks about how his

truck is illegal.

As a result, additional charges

were filed November 21st of

impersonating law enforcement

and obstructing police.

So the guy says on social media,

hey, my truck is illegal and

then he's ago.

I had no idea.

When he told the police they

just cited him for the lights,

they didn't notice that he said

booty patrol.

So now they're looking for him

and his truck.

Oh, so he didn't get arrested

yet?

No Sheriff's Office announced

that it wanted to raise

awareness about the truck,

saying that it had been sighted

in several other Florida

counties.

If you have been arrested by the

booty patrol or given a ticket,

contact the Duval Sheriff's

Department.

It doesn't sound like Duval.

It doesn't sound like.

Duval, which is Jackson, right?

Yeah, doesn't.

Duval Oh, is that why they say

Duval?

Yeah.

Duval County.

Duval County.

Got it.

Hey, there's a Florida woman

that will decorate your

Christmas tree topless for

$300.00.

Oh.

The Booty Patrol guy's in Trove

with the topless ladies, OK?

Well, there was a long story

which I didn't pull, but I just

grabbed the headline.

I've seen her on TikTok.

She normally will clean your

house topless.

Now she's decorating.

But now she has.

She put up on Reddit just as a

joke.

Hey, I'll decorate a tree for

$300.00.

And then her offers came

flooding in.

Just so you know, that star's

never getting straight the what?

The star.

Oh yeah, no.

So she made.

What time is she coming over

like?

My wife already decorated my

trees, but I haven't tried to

negotiate and my wife will do it

topless next year.

Yeah.

Took all the balls.

Off.

She's not doing it.

She's not doing it.

Right.

I should take all the ornaments

down.

Wow.

You know these will go back up.

Faster if you're topless.

I could get a person over here

to take care of that. 3000 she's

made She made $3000 the first

day.

Wow.

It's a lot of trees.

You know, I'm sure there would

be women, Michael, that would

like to have their trees

decorated.

Anything.

Just pour myself out.

Sure, Yeah, $300.00 a tree.

Yeah.

Do you want my wife to just kill

them afterwards or beforehand?

Well, wear maybe.

Maybe a tree mask.

Yeah, nobody loads you.

She kills them and Booty Patrol

comes and puts them in the

trunk.

It's all wrapped up and you're

gone.

And I got my 300 bucks right?

Yeah.

Well, 3000, if it's just 10.

Oh, I just gotta, you know, I

gotta move fast.

Yeah, move fast.

Well, I fear.

You'd be just throw them at the

tree.

It's up.

It's done.

Are you got to listen in the

week, Michael?

I did.

I lost him though.

I do.

It's hold on, hold on, hold on.

It's his name is Jake.

From State Farm.

Jake Palmer, you're a listener.

Another week?

No, no, he doesn't listen.

His Instagram name is Bodied by

Jake.

Bodied by Jake?

Isn't that like infomercial?

Infomercial guy.

No, he's not an infomercial guy.

He actually came up to the shop

this week.

Up here.

Yeah.

Oh, and he dropped off a cigar

for me.

Does he?

Listen to the show.

He does.

Oh, delicious.

He does.

He says he, he said.

Boots don't fucking touch.

Delicious, he said.

Boots don't fucking.

I don't even know what's the

girl you're talking about.

Yeah.

That's what he said, though.

He's the one that takes him up

to death.

Not a lot on his desk, really,

anymore.

No, he just kind of elbow it.

He's smoking all his stuff.

I don't take the stuff he has to

pay for.

I did give him something

special, though.

I gave him.

A Michael Joseph fucking bear.

Burn you with my smoke.

That's when you're decorating

the trees.

Yeah, I'm not.

I'm no, I'm not.

Sorry.

It's not worth it.

There's no IS.

That his name bodied by Jake?

Is that the one we're going

with?

Yeah.

Oh, sorry, I thought you were

still looking.

Bodies.

Bodies by Jake oh, is he part of

the booty patrol?

He's part of the booty patrol.

Oh, nice.

Yeah, he's.

Booty Patrol Bodies by Jake and

listener The way Do you have a

shop?

What's the next location?

You have an event.

Did you say?

I have AI have a shop of the

week.

It's secreto cigars.

So angry.

Look.

At that.

So angry.

It's very angry.

Angry Ronnie.

Anything else that's?

It.

That's all I got.

That's all you got?

That's all I got.

OK, well, hey, before we go, I

want to give a shout out to Gio

on the down to her.

Oh, for the baby.

Congratulations.

Congratulations, Gio.

The baby's name was awesome too.

And it's like.

Step on cabbage Gio.

No, it was.

I'm gonna tell you it.

Was boots.

Hold on, hold on.

I gotta get the, I gotta get the

name 'cause it's a fantastic.

Hustler Network.

Gia Randa or.

No, it was like Spider Man

actually.

Shit, I like Electra.

So it was a girl.

Yeah.

Oh, Electra and Dyna girl, he

had twins.

He had Electra and Dyna girl,

yeah.

That was a superhero show from

when I was a kid.

I think it was a text to me in

boots it.

Was Evan Gelia?

Oh, hurtful.

Gio.

Evangelia he.

Only sends me messages about.

Business, Evan.

Evan.

No.

Oh, please not be Evan.

It's.

Spelled Evan Evangelia.

EVANGELI.

A Yeah, Evangelia.

Oh, that's a pretty.

Strong Italian name.

Yeah.

What?

What is short?

Like evangelist, Right?

Evangelic.

I don't think he's naming or

after a guy that says he can

heal with his hands like Evan.

No, I said what would be the

short?

I mean, you're not going to say

that whole name.

Yeah, EEI guess it could be.

I don't think you shortened that

name, So congratulations, Gio.

Congratulations, Buddy.

And that's all I got.

Let's get to this page.

There we go, the Patreon, we're

doing the Phineas cage.

League of Provo HH 99.

H99 All right, guys, we gotta

go.

Bye.

No.

Problem.

All.

Right.

All right.

You ready?

Yep.

Go ahead.

OK.

First ever Cigar Hustlers

Podcast traveling.

What it what?

What?

What should we?

Call this Boots.

I go.

I mean, Phil, I'm sorry, the.

The Phil and King.

Show the oh.

The Phil and King Show because

we don't have Palmer today.

Yeah.

We have a special guest with us.

We are at.

Smoke on the Water in Weston,

FL.

One of my favorite retail stores

in the entire nation by far.

This place is absolutely

incredible.

They have a huge humidor.

They got awesome bar.

They have a fantastic private

lounge in the back on top of the

fact that they have Joaquin

here.

Say hello, Joaquin.

Hi, everybody.

So Joaquin, you've been in the

industry for how long?

I've been in the business for

six year.

For six years.

And I smoked the water two

years.

You've been here for two years,

all right?

Now I can tell you personally

that I've been to smoke on the

water for probably 10 years at

this point, maybe longer.

And the fucking humidor was a

complete mess until you got

here, bro.

I could tell that you were

working here when I walked in

and I said, Oh my God,

everything is perfect.

Everything is entirely

Immaculate.

So where were you before you

started here?

I working for four years for

Neptune Cigars at the Florida

store.

OK.

And you eventually just made

your move over to this spot.

Yes, Sir.

How is it working with Danny?

No bro.

Let.

Me tell you something, this is

the first time that an American

from Louisiana work with a

Puerto Rican.

I don't know how he can

understand me and how he, I

understand him, right?

The accent on my accent is so

strong.

But we made a awesome team.

Yeah, he's the best.

He gave me the opportunity to do

it myself, what I do best,

right?

And that's the secret, bro.

Smoking cigars, the best

customer service, the most

knowledgeable, the team that we

have right now and it's unique.

Everything is clean, organized

by brands, and we have a team

that's a secret for the customer

service.

Right.

All right.

So I gotta tell you a couple

things.

I know I've probably told you

these things in the past, but at

least I'm gonna put it on record

here.

I knew you were a bad

motherfucker when I walked into

the humidor, first of all, and I

saw that how where everything

was right, everything is

perfectly Immaculate.

Everything is there's nothing on

the floor that you know, there's

no nothing jammed into a corner.

These are the things that as you

travel, you can see that in the

industry, right?

So when I, when I noticed that

here and what was here and now

that that's gone, I was like,

holy shit, who's running this

humidor, right?

Super impressed.

And then we start talking and

you said, oh you know, like, who

are you?

And I'm like, Oh my, my cigar is

post on you.

We're releasing the SBC 22 here.

Well, this is going to record

later, but we're releasing the

SBCC 22 today, December 9th at

at at Smoke on the water.

And you said, oh shit, you have

the Indonesia binder.

And I was like, holy fuck, no

one has ever, like said

something like that to me.

And that was super impressive.

I'm like, man, this guy knows

his shit, dude.

So, so how long you been smoking

cigars?

I begin to smoke 18 history that

everybody knows.

My grand grandfather, he planted

tobacco and Puerto Rico in the

50s and I smoking.

But I think seriously, when I

begin to work with Neptune

cigars and I begin to enjoy

more, what is the industry, the

history behind the cigar, the

history behind the family who

made the cigars.

And the secret is a study.

We are lucky right now that we

have Google, we have Yahoo and

everything is there.

But when you make a awesome

relation with that, you guys,

the owners and the Rep and they

are very prepared and you ask

the correct question, what is

your blend?

Why do they use that?

Why do you look in the cigar

that help me teach my customer?

It's not only smoking is no what

do you expect?

While you're going to smoke,

what do you want?

Do you want a spiciness?

You want a sweetness?

You want a letting you want a

earthiness?

And that way you need to read a

lot, smoke a lot, and then you

develop your palette.

I totally agree man, 100% you

know.

And most important, this is not

a job.

This is my lifestyle.

And we open at 11:50, right?

And I came every morning, 8:00

in the morning, because I love

what I do, is where I spend my

life.

I spend more time here than my

home.

Right.

I mean, shit, today's your day

off and you're here because of

the event.

And because you yeah, I need to

be here.

And I truly appreciate that,

bro.

That speaks volumes.

But I got to be honest, I'm not

surprised that you're coming up

here on your off day to come and

support me and support the

brand, so.

Actually, it's the second one is

that this is that.

This is everybody that know me

when I smoke like this.

Yeah, it's a home run, guys.

It's a home run.

Thank you, man.

Yeah.

So, you know, I unfortunately

didn't blend that one.

My friend Skip did.

But yeah, you know, I'm not

surprised, dude.

You know, and it's, I'm glad

that you smoked it and loved it.

And you know, we only made 500

boxes.

So when they're gone, they're

gone and then it'll be on to the

next one in two more years.

So what was tell me one of the

things that you have learned

like your biggest struggle in

this industry that you you're

like that you had to overcome

what was the hardest thing maybe

on a retailer side whatever the

case may be you know?

My only thing that made me mad

is sometimes our customer don't

respect the humidors.

Yeah.

We have a naked cigar without

cellophane.

We have cigar with cellophane

and I don't know why the people

don't understand that cigar is

for smoking, it's for sniffy.

If you want to sniff it after

you pay, it's OK bro.

But don't sniff the cigar.

May a COVID test with your nose

and put it back in the at the at

the at the bus.

You know it's all respectful for

the other people.

That's what pissed me off.

And the other thing is, is you

check a cigar, you don't want to

put it the same way that you

pick it up.

Don't drop it.

Don't put it anywhere or ask for

help.

We have professional guys.

They know.

Where is everything here You

don't know.

Hey, that's my job.

Give me the cigars.

I put it back.

Thank you for your kind.

That's the only thing that

pissed me off a little bit.

But in general, the Cigar Smoker

are great guys.

All of them.

They they love to enjoy the

smoke with this ring, make a

nice conversation and this is

relaxing time.

You say enjoy after a hard day

working, Come on, sit down, lay

down and you smoke.

Relax.

You put the blood down.

Enjoy life.

It's short.

Absolutely.

You need to enjoy it.

I totally agree, man.

How long do you think it took

you to get the employees that

you wanted, that you found would

be in the right place for you?

Because obviously, you know, it

takes a team, right?

It takes everybody to be on the

same page or at least relatively

on the same page.

So how long do you think it took

for you to kind of get all of

that where, you know, this is

the first time that I have been

here and I haven't been here in

a little bit, but you know, I

could tell that you're very

confident with David who's who's

behind the register right now in

the humidor.

How long do you think it took

for you to kind of work through

all of that?

I'm lucky because my other

colleague is Jeff that begin

today at six and he could be

here for 10 years or more.

He knows his cigar.

He he knows how to run in the

the the humidor.

David is the only one that we

have here and he take it very

very quick and the secret is he

he loves cigar too.

He like to smoke and he's in the

right pair he's going to the to

the the way and we are very

happy with him.

He made himself he everybody

customer every customer told me

the guy is good.

You know his stuff is very is

very professional what he doing

right.

So that's a make it a year.

Yeah.

So how many employees work in

that humidor now 3?

3.

Be myself, I working Sunday to

Thursday and during the day and

David and and Jeff covered the

the time that I know here and

they every 3rd Friday of the

month I work in at night seats

to close or give you a break to

the guys you know right.

Closing every night.

I gotta have, yeah.

I gotta have weekends too, yeah?

Yeah, we we want to give you a

break team too and but it is

it's a it's a fun place, right?

We have the best customers.

This is a family here, right?

We celebrate New Year's Eve, we

celebrate Christmas, we our

people, we make a lot of privacy

event here for parties and

personally I do event with the

manufacturers and Master

Blender.

We put it here in the at the

back of the the the cigar bar

and then make a private

presentation to the end because

I believe more in each our smoke

it that's selling cigars only we

need to learn where they come

from.

Why a cigar cost $20.00 or

$18.00, right?

Because behind the construction

it's a lot of time a lot of

money of course and some people

don't understand that me that

have the opportunity to be at

Nicaragua's and Honduras and VR

with the master blend.

The other owners.

I know the all the process.

I deal the process and that's

something that teach me a lot.

I learn a lot with them.

Especially Don Julio was my he

teach me how to roll in a cigar.

That's.

That's it's very it's no easy I

broke in maybe 10 hit rapper

before I can roll in my my 3

cigars.

But when you have that

opportunity, help you to develop

your your knowledge and your

passion for the business.

Right.

Yeah, absolutely.

Man, that makes all the

difference.

I'll tell you one thing, The

first time I met Danny, I was

still kind of working on, kind

of finding myself in this

industry.

So I I pulled in here in like a

button up.

Fucking polo.

Yeah.

Which you'll never see ever

again.

President Bush.

Yeah.

And I went, I came into this

place.

It was this place just opened in

the morning.

And there's this guy, this tall

goofy fuck, standing around with

a mop bucket and a mop in his

hand.

And I said, hey, I'm looking for

Danny and he's like, oh, I'm

Danny, how are you?

I was like, oh shit dude, we are

going to get along.

You you forget something?

Yeah, the sandals.

Oh yeah, in sandals, yeah, 100%.

So.

So he's in sandals.

He's got a mop bucket in his

hand.

He's got his hat backwards, you

know, just kind of super chill.

And he's like, yeah, I'm the

guy.

I'm like dude, this is perfect.

You know when I when I got that

impression from him, I was

instantly I'm like you we we're

going to get along.

We are definitely going to and

we we hit it off man from that

point forward.

So I can understand how you when

you meet him and you know you

see you guys find the

opportunity together for you to

work here it's you know you gel.

I'm sure that there's times you

know what I mean.

I'm as as any business goes

through, I'm sure that there's

always head butting and

conflict, but at the end of the

day, the perspective and the

goal is still the same thing,

right?

You know The funny thing I've

been I was a customer for two

year before I came to work here

and I came every Thursday or

Friday, smoke my cigars, make a

drink.

Actually they in that moment,

they don't selling the run that

I drink and they buy for me.

Oh, nice.

And that was very kind of them.

And I am the only one that

smoked drinking donkey here.

It's a Puerto Rican run, of

course, and we make a friendship

and during the pandemic I didn't

work.

In that moment we begin to talk

and develop our friendship and

in 2021 we have a serious

conversation and that as I said

his offer and I don't regret.

It's the best decision during my

life.

I love that he's a he's a

awesome guy.

He's a hard worker.

He is and if you think I know

cigar, he know more.

He remember every cigar from 16

year, 20 years ago and I say

bro, how do you remember that?

I, I, I don't even remember that

cigar, right.

And he had a complete knowledge.

What is his business?

What is the industry?

And I have all my respect.

Yeah, man, He's got a good pulse

on things, dude.

Yeah, And he and he's got

another shop up in Louisiana.

Yep, that was that smoke on the

water as well.

Smoke on the Water in County

Street is A2 block from Barber

St.

So hopefully that does as a nice

little bit of business when we

go back to PCA in. 2024.

Yeah, yeah, that should be

really good.

We're going to be there.

Yeah.

So we've had a couple

opportunities.

He's come up to the shop a few

times and we've hung out as

well.

You know when he's not here and

I get to, you know, what's

really kind of fascinating is

when you're in your store, you

are kind of in this mode, right?

And you're focused on business.

And yeah, it's still leisure,

but at the end of the day,

you're still focusing on

business.

When he came up to the shop, I

finally got to experience Danny

100%, you know, without any

interaction from his own retail

shop.

And dude, that just made me like

the guy even more.

I'm like, fuck man, you're

awesome, dude.

So I'm glad that you're here,

dude.

I really AM.

And you know, and I'm very

fortunate and very grateful that

that you are in that humidor and

that you always have my back and

that and that you support the

brand the way that you do.

And I appreciate all the time

and the effort and the knowledge

that you have put into your

entire life for the cigars.

And I look forward to continuing

to work with you man and

continuing to build.

And if you have anything else

you want to plug or anything,

just let me know, we'll drop it

right now.

I want to invite everyone that

is in South Florida close to

Weston.

We have a sales event, the his

cigars and we have the launch of

the SBC 22 and we have special

and we're going to make a raffle

tonight.

I'm going to be here.

You want to meet me?

I don't want to be at the

humidor working, but I'll be

outside.

That is much better.

I'm going to be checking my

room, smoking my cigar.

I know everybody.

Absolutely, man.

And if you're in the South

Florida area, please come out

here and at any time and meet

Joaquin, meet, meet the squad

here at Smoke on the Water.

We're going to, we're going to

talk one more guy in a minute

here going to bring out Larry

and we're going to have a little

bit of a conversation too.

So thank you again for so much

for coming on bro.

Appreciate you.

Do you have an upcoming event

after this event, Do you want to

plug to or do you know of yet?

I I have to have one next

weekend this weekend Wednesday.

OK that's I posted on my page on

Instagram.

Joaquin Ortiz is only 2620

personally is with JC Newman

company.

OK, and but it's limited.

It's only 20 is do you need want

to make a reservation?

You need to test me at

787-645-8587.

There you go.

He's only 20 persons.

Get on it.

Get on it.

The direct connect right there

to walk in and smoke all the

water.

I was scared with the 77.

It's like Puerto Rico and a

Rico.

Thank you guys.

All right.

Thanks so much.

Thank you.

All right, you can just keep

recording.

That was perfect 16, bro.

Yeah, 16 minutes, that was.

Perfect.

I took my mask off for a second.

Yeah, yeah, That's.

Got to be fucking miserable.

It's hot.

Let.

Me see let.

Me see that Dome?

Oh yeah, Sweaty.

It was 16 minutes.

Said recording stopped.

You got him on video with that?

It's because the storage was

full let.

Me.

Go ahead and delete some.

That should cost 3 grand, 2

grand board and.

Everything.

Well, this isn't.

This isn't even our main this.

Is the backup.

This is the backup.

This is our smaller one, the

main.

You have a studio I heard about.

Dan told me about your studio.

That's what it looks like.

Yeah, that was when I had drunk

Pedro on.

I couldn't hear it.

Pedro was drunk.

Oh yeah, he was really fucked

up.

Yeah, yeah.

He's like, hey, you know you

can't, you can.

Barely understand it.

Yeah, he's like, hey, before.

No, it's OK.

Yeah, we'll crop it.

Yeah.

I said hey, before you, before

you release that, I'd like to

listen to it.

So we sent it to him and he

goes, what do you guys think?

I'm.

Gonna get fired if you fucking

play.

That and I said, to be honest,

dude, you were a little drunk,

didn't come off the best.

I don't know, I don't think you

said anything wrong, but

whatever.

And he goes, yeah, maybe I'll do

another one with you some other

times.

All right, sounds good.

So we took some fucking sound

bites and we plugged it into the

board because there's one he

goes cigar Hustler, He's the

fucking best.

Exactly.

Fucking awesome, dude.

That's hilarious.

All right.

Did you get that video saved or

no?

You sure?

Yes.

All right, we're.

Good.

All right, go.

Ahead and put the headphones on

and you'll see same scenario,

right?

So it's it's a shotgun mic, so

if you're up close and on it,

you'll sound perfect.

All right.

Good.

Yeah.

Perfect.

You can hear yourself.

Yep.

OK, and now we have you.

Larry, what's going on, buddy?

Not.

Much What's going on with you?

All right, So what the fuck do

you do with smoke on the water?

I don't know.

Whatever.

Whatever.

Whatever's necessary.

Quite honestly, yeah, whatever's

necessary.

Yeah, you're you're like the

wolf.

Yeah, you solve the manager

here.

You solve the problems.

I solve the problems.

Sometimes I create the problems.

It is what it is, yeah.

Yeah, sometimes those problems

are good.

Sometimes those.

Problems are bad.

What's awesome for me is I

contact three of you at this

point when I'm looking to see if

you guys want anything right?

I try and start with Joaquin.

Believe it or not, I text

Joaquin first, and then I text

Danny and then I text you when

all else has failed.

I'm like Larry.

No one's responding.

What's going on, you know?

That's what happened last time,

right?

So.

Yeah, Where we at?

Where we at on this, you know?

But everybody's running and

gunning, dude.

There's a million things going

on.

And it's not like I never take

that as, oh, nobody wants to

talk to me.

Like I know everybody here, you

know, So it's just like, OK,

they're in some shit or

whatever.

I'll circle back or whatever the

case may be.

So, so tell me some of the shit,

man.

So tell me, give me your

funniest story that has happened

at this place.

Funniest story here.

Yeah, yeah.

Oh God.

I mean there.

There's so many funny stories

here I I couldn't single it out

to just one, quite honestly.

Yeah, there was not one that

just pops in your head.

They're all, they're all pretty

funny.

I mean, I I mean, I don't drink

anymore, so I don't.

I'm not part of those stories.

Anymore.

That's the.

That's the SO.

When I observe the these

stories, I just shrug it off and

shake my head and it's like what

the fuck?

When you observe the fuckery.

You observe everything.

Yeah.

So.

And I see what I used to be,

right?

You know, and you know, some of

these people are still the same,

which is, you know, that's

that's part of the process.

I mean, every day is funny.

Here.

It's funny because we have a

podcast as well.

We talk.

That's exactly what we talk

about.

What's the name of the podcast?

Thick Skin Podcast.

Thick Skin Podcast.

Yeah, because if you sit at our

bar, if anybody sit at our bar,

you're going to hear some shit.

You're like, what the hell is

going on?

And some people can't believe

what we're talking about, right?

And it's like, no, this is real.

Like, where did that happen to

go?

Arrow.

Cigar Bar, right.

That's the thing.

So there really isn't anything

really, like, nothing funny that

sticks out of my head other

than, you know, people getting

in fights, right?

You know, not, not the serious

all our kids.

Satisfy, but just drunk idiocy.

Exactly.

Just dumb shit happening, right?

That's basically.

But I don't have anything,

honestly.

Something specific for you.

I wish I did.

If I, you know I will, I'll let

you know.

I'll type it out and just let

you know.

Philly's holding back.

He's holding.

He's definitely holding.

I am not.

Come on.

Come on.

Promise you That's a luxury of

me not drinking.

Actually, I'm not.

I'm not holding back on the

record.

I'm not holding back on

anything.

Funny.

Well, I can get him a drink,

man.

It's been 4. 190 days, right?

Yeah, I know.

We don't want to break that.

I'm just fucking with you.

So how often do you do your

podcast?

Every week.

We do it every week.

Yeah.

We recorded every week and we're

messing with our editor right

now, a couple editors.

So it's kind of like one of

those deals where we promote the

bar, promote our, you know, our

cigar pimp line as well, promote

any events that we have.

That's basically what it's for,

honestly.

It's just it was three guys

shooting the shit and we're

sitting here, you know, I

actually listen to one of your

podcasts and it's like, you

know, we should just record this

crap and just see what sticks.

You know, that's part of the

fun.

That's part of the fun,

especially in this industry, is,

you know, you have a, you have

a, you know, core following like

you guys do and like everybody

else does.

You try to create something like

that, right?

Something fun.

If someone can't experience our

place, no.

Maybe they could live

vicariously through us through

this podcast.

Sure.

What else it is.

What's really kind of crazy dude

is, you know, as you start doing

that, people will come up to you

and talk to you about shit that

you said.

Or maybe you tell them a story

that you said on the podcast and

then they'll finish it before

you even like, oh, OK, like,

yeah, I heard it already.

I'm like, son of a bitch.

Like, OK, well, did I tell you

about, oh shit, you heard that

one too, you know, or someone

comes in that's from out of

town.

Like, man, I've listened to your

podcast and I was just wanted to

come in and meet everybody who's

on there.

Is it you, Danny?

Or no, actually, Dan's not on

there.

Dan's a little gunshot when it

comes to still kidding.

No, he doesn't.

He doesn't like that stuff.

So that's what I'm here for,

basically.

What?

Yeah, he he he's not a camera

guy.

He's not.

No.

He's the he's the guy behind the

scenes.

That's the thing.

I mean, people don't realize,

you know, anytime people come in

here, like, who's owner?

You the owner here?

Go, No, absolutely not.

Where's the owner?

Like he's sitting over at the

bar and I literally point at the

guy like, which one?

Right.

Like that guy who dressed up,

He's like.

Nope.

Guess again.

That's not him.

Bag over there.

Nope.

Guess again.

I can't.

Which one is it?

The guy, the guy that looks like

Jesus.

The guy looks like Jesus with

his feet up jeans that he had on

for probably a couple days and

his flip flops and his hat on

backwards.

Dan.

I think when people don't know

who Dan is, they don't realize,

you know, what he does for this

place.

Then we've been open for 14

years now.

So it's kind of like one of

those deals where he literally

knows every inch of this bar.

No.

So if you ask what I do, I try

to learn every inch of this bar

as well, which I don't.

I'm not allowed to touch certain

things because I'll break it,

right?

That's me.

Don't touch.

Don't touch.

That.

Yeah, exactly.

No electronics.

I'm not allowed to touch any

electronics.

Yeah, I've broken way too many

TV's here just trying to install

new TV.

Like 1 broke.

I installed one.

He's like you fucking broke.

And they go, what are you

talking about?

I said it around the tables.

Like to put anything on the

table like no crack.

No shit.

So.

How long you been here?

Four years?

Four years?

Four years, No parole.

No parole.

Absolutely no parole.

So you got mid sobriety like

halfway through it?

Yeah, it was just a year and a

half ago.

It was just something I want to

do, you know, for myself and

more for my kids and my family.

Well, you know, I want to see be

able to watch them grow up and,

you know, get old and then me

get old grandkids, all that

other good stuff.

And it was one of those deals,

you know, everybody always asked

me.

I used to drink a bottle and A

at least a bottle and a half a

day.

No shit.

Every day.

Every day with that man.

Like, like what was it?

Anything good?

No Johnny Walker black and

tequila man.

Shit towards my tail in there

was always tequila, every

tequila, every bottle in the

like.

That's why we have over 600

liquors here, cuz I brought in

half of them.

No shit like.

Our book was like, literally,

like half an inch.

Now we're like almost an inch

and a half.

Two inches thick.

Wow.

Yeah.

So we have a lot of stuff, but

the good thing is it's we

increased our offering, it's

good for the public, it's good

you know breath of product line

in regards to liquor bar as

well.

I mean you see our expansive,

how our humidor is and we're

trying to, you know, I'm not

trying to emulate the same thing

with the bar.

But you know, you know, for the

most part, we sell time in there

And you know the longer cigar

that Joaquin sells and that

means you know you guys are

going to sit at the bar longer,

right, And drink more.

Yeah, of course.

That's the, that's the, that's

the goal.

That's the magic form of that, I

guess.

So did something happen that

gave you?

And if you don't want to talk

about, that's cool, but I'm just

kind of curious.

Did you have a moment where

you're like, fuck, I need to get

my shit together Like it?

It was just like everybody else.

It was one of those what the

fuck moments, right?

You wake up one day.

Naked in a Bush or something?

OK, that has happened with me,

not in the Bush.

I actually was dropped off 1/4

of July.

We'll get to the.

OK, let's talk about this.

Yes. 1. 1st of July.

This was a couple years, two

years ago actually.

I made this or no tequila

infused pineapple.

OK like that jar actually full

of tequila and full of

pineapple, sliced pineapples and

Dan and I.

We were made crawfish and we

started eating it at 10 in the

morning.

Oh my.

God, it didn't stop until 2:00

in the morning.

No shit.

So he takes me home along with

one of our good customers, and

me and him get into a wrestling

match in my driveway.

Nice.

Me and Dan, he's like, get the

fuck.

Out of the car like.

Shut the fuck.

Get each other and we're

literally resting in the

driveway.

I fell, hitting my head on this

guy's car.

Oh shit.

Like dented his car.

Back then I was bigger.

I lost some weight too, so I was

like 390 lbs back then and

dented his car.

Then they throw me in the house,

don't put me in bed and then

throw me in the house.

But when I woke up the next day,

around four or five in the

afternoon, I woke up naked with

one shoe on.

One shoe.

One shoe, one socking shoe.

I have no idea what happened to

my clothes.

You.

Gave up at that point I.

Don't.

I don't understand how I got my

pants off and everything else

off and I have one fucking sock

and shoe on.

And that wasn't the instance

when I said, hey, I got to stop

drinking, you know, Honestly, it

was something else that's, you

know, for another day.

Right.

Maybe my memoir book?

Right.

But you know, it's something

that I just made a personal

decision for, right?

The better myself, obviously the

better this place, right?

And the better my family as

well.

That's awesome.

And it, I'll be honest with you,

the first 2-3 weeks was very

difficult.

I'm sure.

Especially here, you know, I'm

here every day and I'm around

liquor every day.

And you ordered a lot of this

stuff.

I ordered a lot of this stuff.

For the record, I still taste

the liquor.

I just don't drink.

I just choose not to drink

anymore.

Nothing.

I need a glass of wine.

No beer.

So what do you spit it out or?

No, I just, I taste it.

I'd literally take a little sip.

I taste it because it's, you

know, just like cigars.

If King's in there picking

cigars, he's going to smoke it

like, OK, this is really, really

good.

Or this is really a piece of

shit, right.

You know, we're not going to

carry the cigar right now.

Granted, his palace different

than you, me, you know,

everybody else and Steve over

there.

So it's it's different but

liquor it no it it's somewhat of

a constant right So and and I'm

only going to serve what we're

only going to offer here is like

some of the good, the best stuff

here available right.

And then we're going to spend

money.

It's liquid gold, and I don't

want to just carry any, you

know, regular swill or bullshit

that any other bar.

Right, you say.

Yeah, whatever.

We'll take that.

You know you want to know

exactly what you're.

Selling exactly.

We're not going to have as

expansive of a, you know, higher

end selection like Corona would

be or Jeff in the his group,

right.

But you know, we have a pretty,

pretty good selection.

I think you have a damn good

selection for sure.

Yeah, for sure.

I'd say better than theirs,

personally.

Way better, way better.

OK, well, so how often are you

here?

Are you here every day like

Joaquin or you know, Sunday

through Thursday or?

No, I'm here every day or as

needed, right?

You know, here primarily night

time.

This time of year, I actually

have the luxury of taking some

time off because it's offseason,

so to speak.

We really haven't had an

offseason down here, which is

great for the business.

But, you know, spending time

with my family, I mean, I get my

kids every the weekend.

So spending time with my kids,

my girlfriend, or, you know,

just basically just a day off or

two.

How many kids you got?

222 girls, 14 and 17. 2 girls.

Yeah, man, I'm paying for the

sins of the past, so.

Yeah, the girls are awesome.

Dude, no, they're amazing.

They're amazing.

My oldest daughter is actually

graduating a year early from

high school.

No shit.

Yeah, that's fantastic, dude.

Pretty cool, she yeah, she

didn't get those trades from me,

so.

Where does she want to go to

college or what?

Yeah, she's looking at UCF and

UF, right?

Now.

Oh, no kidding.

She wants to get in like law

enforcement and stuff like that,

so and she said the only rule is

if you do that, like FBI or

anything like that.

Don't look me up.

Don't.

No, Well, background check,

obviously.

Yeah, that has to pass.

But me and my friends, I'm going

to give you a list.

Please give us fair warning.

Right.

Drop the heads.

Up.

Exactly.

But smoking the water in

Nicaragua?

Pretty soon?

You never know.

So.

Yeah.

Cool, man.

Well, and where can they find

your podcast?

It's on YouTube right now.

I I do you know Thick Skin

podcast.

Also on Instagram.

OK, but it's you can find it on

YouTube.

OK, perfect.

So check them out on YouTube.

Yeah, and you're good.

That's it.

We ran out of.

We ran out of footage.

That's OK.

But we still have the audio, so

we'll put in some black space

here on the YouTube video.

That looks skinnier on with no

camera.

Put in a nice picture.

You mean both, pal.

You mean both?

All right, well, we're going to

get back out there.

We're going to get going on this

event and.

I know.

I appreciate you guys coming

out, absolutely.

Dude, thank you for having us

man.

We love you too bro.

You're you guys are fucking all

awesome.

So.

The only other guy with the last

name longer me in the.

Industry.

That's it, baby.

That's it. 15 letters.

All right.

Well, we're going to get going.

Thanks again.

Thanks again.

All right.

Bye.

Bye.

Perfect.

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Show Notes

Description:

In this episode, the Cigar Hustlers dive into the legal landscape, unpacking the upcoming schedule unveiled by the U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia in the long-standing Cigar Association of America et al. v. United States Food and Drug Administration et al. lawsuit. Seven years in the making, this lawsuit filed by three cigar trade groups challenges the FDA's deeming regulations.

Listeners get the latest scoop on industry shifts as Esteban Carreras, Perdomo, and Black Label Trading Co. all announce impending price increases for 2024. Meanwhile, the closing of Casa de Montecristo's Webster, Texas location by the end of December prompts contemplation about the evolving cigar retail landscape.

Delving into industry expansions, the team discusses Cigars International's strategic plans for a new Pittsburgh area store, tapping into the market's pulse.

The episode doesn't just stick to business updates; it ventures into intriguing news. Luciano Cigars teases enthusiasts with the imminent release of "Underrated" slated for January, sparking anticipation among aficionados.

But the surprises don't end there – the hosts take a lighthearted turn, sharing quirky news from Florida. From a driver in custody sporting a truck labeled "Booty Patrol," as per the DeSoto County Sheriff’s Office, to a Florida woman offering to toplessly decorate Christmas trees for $300, the hosts inject humor into the mix, proving that the world of cigars isn't just about regulations and price shifts.

Join the Cigar Hustlers as they navigate the serious, the intriguing, and the downright unusual facets of the cigar world in this eclectic and informative episode.

Stick Around at the end for a Bonus episode from Smoke on The Water Westin