ACHP Episode 467 Cigar Guys, Brittany and The Yellow Thrush
Episode Summary
Episode 467 of A Cigar Hustler's Podcast has Mike Palmer and Phil "Boots" McGuffey welcoming Alex Gonzalez of The Cigar Guys podcast as guest co-host. The show opens with a friendly turf war over podcast rankings — Alex explains how The Cigar Guys ended up claiming the "number one cigar podcast" spot via Spotify keyword searches, and the crew picks apart how Feedspot's pay-to-play cigar podcast list actually works. From there the guys run through their usual off-the-rails news block: Elon Musk allegedly shifting focus from Mars to the moon (and a round of moon-landing skepticism), Britney Spears selling her music catalog to Primary Wave, Netflix advertising a private flight attendant job paying up to $385,000, and a strange mass die-off of yellow-headed thrushes in Chihuahua, Mexico.
The cigar news is the meat of the episode. Prometheus is expanding Fuente Fuente OpusX Purple Rain from a single Lonsdale to three new sizes later in the year, including a Heaven & Earth Purple Rain and a diadema — which sparks an honest conversation about Opus hype versus value. Alex admits he's never really connected with Fuente, tells the story of chasing down a Purple Rain from "Discount Doyle" only to toss it after two puffs, and the panel compares notes on Fuente's Casa Cuba and Tiempo de Oro, the Cathedral cigar experience, and the industry's swing back toward 60 ring gauge cigars after the Lancero and Connecticut waves. They also cover JM Tobacco's Española Aniversario 30 Years — a Maduro with Mexican San Andrés wrapper, Dominican HVA binder, and Dominican/Pennsylvania filler, plus a Habano version — and flag the confusion in the press release over whether it's debuting at TPE in March or PCA in April.
The back half turns to regulation and business. Illinois Senate Bill 3148 would ban flavored tobacco outright with none of the exemptions California and Massachusetts carved out, and even though neither host smokes infused cigars, both argue the ban is a slippery slope toward regulating traditional cigars. They discuss how brands sidestep flavor definitions (Acid vs. Sweet Jane, Miami Cigar Co.'s offerings), reference CRA and PCA advocacy, and talk trade show economics and media passes for TPE.
The episode closes with "What's the Score?", the crew's Half Wheel guessing game, this time on the Kellner Cigars LE80 — a $57 7x50 perfecto from the Dominican Republic with an Ecuadorian Habano wrapper, reviewed by Patrick Lagreid. Alex plays as a first-timer and lands on the exact 86 score, handing Phil a rare defeat. Palmer also plugs upcoming appearances: a Bespoke event at Northport Cigars and a St. Pere Cigars night at Cigars on the Avenue, both on the 25th.
In This Episode
- 01Who's the #1 Cigar Podcast?Alex Gonzalez explains how The Cigar Guys claimed the top Spotify ranking and why Feedspot's cigar podcast list is essentially pay-to-play.
- 02News Block: Musk, Britney and NetflixMoon colonization conspiracy talk, Britney Spears selling her catalog to Primary Wave, and Netflix's $385K private flight attendant job posting.
- 03Yellow-Headed Thrushes Dying in ChihuahuaHundreds of birds dove headfirst into the ground in a Mexican town on February 7, likely fleeing predatory birds.
- 04Three New OpusX Purple Rain SizesPrometheus expands the Fuente Fuente OpusX Purple Rain line to three vitolas, plus a $12,975 humidor with 106 OpusX cigars.
- 05Is Opus Worth the Hype?Alex explains why Fuente never clicked for him, the Purple Rain he threw out after two puffs, and which Fuente blends the crew actually likes.
- 0660 Ring Gauge and Cigar TrendsWhy shop owners are suddenly asking for the biggest cigars a brand makes, after years of Lancero and Connecticut booms.
- 07Española Aniversario 30 YearsJM Tobacco marks 30 years with Maduro and Habano limited editions, and a press-release mix-up over TPE versus PCA 2026 dates.
- 08Illinois Flavored Tobacco BanSB 3148 would ban flavored tobacco with no exemptions, and why even infused-cigar skeptics oppose it as a slippery slope.
- 09What's the Score: Kellner LE80The crew guesses Patrick Lagreid's Half Wheel score for the $57 Kellner LE80, and the guest nails it on his first try.
Brands & Cigars Discussed
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Transcript
Welcome to Cigar Hustler Podcast, episode 467, you guys changed the speed of my remote. I'm Mike Palmer, your host, and with me today, as always, is Phil, I awkwardly had to engineer the Mikey Impressin' Love Show yesterday, McGuffey. Super awkward. Super awkward.
See, I told you, it's weird, isn't it? Yeah, it was weird. The hand thing was weird. And then as my co-host today, from the number one rated cigar podcast, they claim, the Cigar Guys, Alex Gonzalez.
It's true. Thanks for having me, guys. Thanks, Alex. Appreciate you breaking away from the number one show.
We gotta help the little people who are at, you know? We appreciate you bringing your greatness to our show to help us in the ratings. It's very nice of you. Of course.
Whatever you need, just let me know. I'm always here to help. Phil's very upset, though, that you guys claim to be the number one show. Listen, it's not my fault.
Well, it is my fault. So basically what happened was we just did a really, really good job for the last three years and I woke up one day and found out that we are number one ranking on Spotify now. Oh. Now, there's a special search you do because you showed it to me to verify, but what is the right wording you used?
Well, so the concept that I discovered it from is essentially when you look up different cigar-related keywords, it shows up number one in the majority of them. So you can use that mathematically to deduct that we would be considered the number one ranking cigar show on those two platforms. And there's no official ranking, because they don't have, you know, cigar podcasts. Yeah, no, they don't.
Like, you have comedy, you have number one ranking in comedy, leisure, whatever. Right. So, we have to make our own cigar. They don't specifically make our niche.
They don't, no. Right. Because they hate us. Right, exactly.
Feedspot does. Have you looked on Feedspot? They do a cigar ranking. Yes, they do.
Yeah, and I actually talked to them about it. I was like, so, how does this ranking work? Because I'm pretty sure it's mostly pay to play. Oh, is it?
Because we were number two at one point. I remember this. So I don't know how they do their rankings, but their business model is you can pay them to rank higher. Right.
So if you pay them 20 bucks a month or something, you're in like spot number six or eight or whatever. So that list is pay to play. I don't know how they rank it outside of that. Because I know like not all of these podcasts are paying them.
Some of them don't even exist anymore. Right. So like how about that cigar show, rest in peace, is still on there? Oh, rest in peace.
Look at you. So, they're still on there. So, I mean, I don't know how they curate that list, but... How often do you check the rankings?
The last month? I check it like once a week, maybe. Do you? Yeah.
I used to do that too. Wait till you get older and you don't care anymore. Yeah, exactly. I didn't care for the first three years and now I care.
Oh, because you found out you're doing good. Exactly. Yeah, right. " I guess we'll do this.
Yeah, I guess we'll keep going for eight years. And if you find out that you still get no more money, then you don't care anymore. That's just it. Well, they do sponsorship on that show.
True. Are you looking for two new guys? We're not Albanian, but we are willing to change them. Are you willing to work?
We're willing to work. Work. Have you been in here? Look at all this.
There you go. You guys are tired. Well, he's good at the buttons. Yeah.
I'm good at pressing buttons. I'm the one that does the buttons, so it'd be nice to have someone else do it. Isn't it? Yeah.
That was the first thing I gave up was the buttons. Yeah. " Yeah, until they found other things for me to do, then I don't push the buttons. Right.
Do you miss being a button pusher? No, but I do, the only part of the Mike Impressions show I enjoy is, well, there's two things, one, I don't have to talk, and two, you push the buttons, but I get bored, and I forget to push the buttons sometimes, so there might be a long segment of somebody not talking. Yeah. That's what happens on our show.
If someone's sitting off camera doing it, I'll like look over and I'm like, they're on their phone right now. Right. I mean, you know, there's only so much sports I can handle when they're talking, so. All right.
On today's show, Elon Musk has returned Mars and now he wants to buy the moon. Britney Spears is in the money. Netflix has its own flight attendants. Do you guys know that?
So, they have their own flight attendants, and they're looking to hire a new one. And then in Chihuahua, Mexico, birds are dying to get into Chihuahua for some reason. Chihuahua. Chihuahua.
The dog? Yeah, but I spelled it C-H-I-W-A-W-A because I couldn't spell Chihuahua. Close enough. Close enough.
It's phonetics. And then in cigars, Opus is making it rain purple. Espanola Anniversario Cigar is having its own PCA, apparently. Oh.
And there's no more Tutti Frutti cigars in Illinois. And then finally, we have a What's the Score? Are you familiar with our What's the Score game? I'm excited for this.
You get to play. Everybody loves to play What's the Score. Yeah. But before we get started, Phil, how do we get some of that CHPod swag?
Well, what you want to do is, man, I forget, Palmer, tell me what you're going to do. com. Even I knew that. Ben has posted a picture of his very own beanie.
Oh, wait, one that he got from us or one that he did himself? Yeah, no, no, no, he has the one and only, well, I guess you have one, too, but he has the only technically official beanie from CH Pod Production. Oh, look at him. Up there in the Great North.
He said his head was warm while he was smoking, so he must do a great job. One of one. Please like and subscribe on whichever of our formats you watch or listen to the show in. And then if you, what is it, you buy one, if you buy two shirts, one's 40% off, If you spend over $100, you get free shipping.
I believe that's how he says it. If I'm wrong, you can't hold me to it. Should we release a new shirt today since Mikey isn't here? I almost just ordered some, so do that first.
Tell them what shirt we want them to make, Phil. Is it the iHeart Preston? Yes, yes. Yeah, whatever his initials are, it's iHeart Preston's initials.
With a picture of Preston with a heart around him. Yes. Sort of a little off-center. I don't want that one.
You don't want that one? Good Valentine's Day promo. Yeah, Mikey will buy all of them himself. That might be the only problem.
Can't let these get out. Can't let these get out. This is mine now. I'm already sliding in the chair.
Yeah. All right, moving on now with the news. Elon Musk has switched his focus from Mars to the moon. So guys, he's decided Mars is too far and it's going to take too long to get there.
So now he is devoting all his money and power to colonizing the moon. Super expensive. Well, the moon apparently is very cheap. Oh, so.
Well, what about this? What if he knows something we don't know? What if we're running out of time? And because it takes too far to get to Mars, we have to go to the moon?
Could be. Which is a big problem because the moon is much smaller. So that means that you and I might not even make it. Holds less people?
Yeah, holds less people. Yeah, but it's inhabitable. " I should go there, look how close it is. That's the moon, Elon.
Oh, I don't have that in my country. But yeah, what if Alex is right? What if we're running out of time? You know, he would know.
This is one of those many mysteries in life. We're never gonna know. I mean, the only thing we have closest to it telling us that we're running out of time is Terminator. Yeah.
Or it could be that we're in a closed system, and the moon is inside the closed system, and that's the only place we can go to. He's going Pauly Shore. I'm just throwing it all out there. You're throwing out all these things.
Wow, all these conspiracy theories. You know, Palmer, you're gonna put him in a room, and he's gonna have to put his jacket on so he doesn't freak out now. Straightjacket? Yeah.
The one with the wraparound sleeves. Yeah. We don't call it straightjackets. Yeah, it's very flattering, that very trendy jacket, the self-hugging jacket, so do you guys think we actually went to the moon then, no, yeah, I don't think so, you don't think so, yeah, I don't think so, now there's things on the moon, they say that you can aim like a laser at and hit and it bounces back, have you done it though, well, no, I don't have a laser, I know, it's like, I haven't a single person that's actually done it, well, they did it on the Big Bang Theory TV show, so, well, TV show, fictional TV show, With the fictional scientists?
Yes, they did it. Fictionally. I've met Buzz Aldrin. What does that mean?
And even he'll tell you we didn't go to the moon. Yeah. Does he really say we didn't go? Oh, yeah.
Yeah. Just look up, Buzz Aldrin says we didn't go to the moon, and there's like at least three. There are a lot of things that aren't correct if you look it up. I just don't understand, like, one, why we would go to the moon, and number two.
To beat the Russians. That was the original reason. We must be first. At that time, technology definitely wasn't advanced enough, I think, to really make it there.
The argument is that, obviously, the government will have more advanced technology than we will for decades. The reason I don't believe it is because there's been too many inconsistencies from that time until now. So it's like, okay, if there's this many inconsistencies and glitches, so to say, it's like, come on. It's not concerning, I guess, but that's what makes me think it didn't actually happen.
Maybe the real story is Alien vs. Predator. Maybe when they got to the moon, they saw those two guys. I saw that movie, too.
Yeah, and they were like, you know what? We can't tell anybody about this, but it could be a fictional movie. It's a fictional movie. Yeah.
Like the dark side of the moon type thing. Yeah. There's like monsters there. Yeah, that's another one.
Yeah. Well, that's where they all hide. That's where they all hide. Booth doesn't like the dark side because he's a racist.
Wow. Sorry, Phil doesn't like talking about the dark side of the moon. What a bold statement. He doesn't believe there is a dark side.
So, when the full moon's out, he's in a much better mood. He's in a much better mood, right. Yeah. There's dark patches on him.
He doesn't know what to do. No, that's not true. Yeah, that's not it. He's a homophobic racist.
No, I'm not a racist. Oh, he doesn't deny the other part. You're supposed to be the racist, remember? Good catch.
Yeah, that's right. You're a homophobic racist. I am not a racist. Show's so much more fun when Wendy's not here.
Well, man, I don't, yeah, you're right. No, we don't need to get into it. Yeah, let's not get into it. We don't get banned.
This isn't Patreon, guys. Yeah, he comes back and finds out there's no show anymore. Well, I've held it. What happened?
Nothing, we don't have to do this anymore. We solved the problem of the money. All right, moving on. Here we go.
We're getting into something better. Britney Spears has got a lot of money again now, guys. Oh, what'd she do? She sold the rights to her music.
Of course she did. Just like Justin Bieber. Bieber did it first. So, what this actually means is she has sold her songs moving forward.
So, any money that her songs make as of, I guess she sold it yesterday, she doesn't make any money on them anymore. Royalties and radio play and all that kind of stuff. Well, her dad doesn't make any money. Well, yeah, that's probably more likely.
Maybe that's why she did it, because she wasn't making any stars. But it's sold for an undisclosed amount, but Justin Bieber sold his for a hundred million dollars. You could take everything I see on this show right now. Right, exactly.
I'd make that deal. You know, a hundred million dollars a gumpst up against future earnings? You do it for a hundred thousand. Yeah, let's be real.
I'd do it for a hundred. You can have all the bing bong you want. Oh, the bing bong. She sold her ownership share in her music catalog to a publisher at Primary Wave that has multiple outlets reported with TMZ first to break the news.
How did TMZ now, because of the Samantha Gunther thing, they are now the premier news agency in the United States? Very disappointing. Everybody goes there first now for everything. I hate TMZ.
Man, I do too. I'll be honest, I mean, TMZ has always been kind of like a celebrity news source, but I mean, they're pretty quick with this stuff. Now, how accurate it is, I'm not sure. I don't think they care.
They're like us. They don't fact check. Yeah. We don't fact check either.
There you, that's the only way to do it. If you fact check, there's a lot of things you can't say. The only thing we fact checked was that we were ranking number one, because that thing actually excited me, but with TMZ, the problem is, yeah, exactly, they are a media company that is focused on the ratings, and they don't need to be accurate for them to make money, and no one does redactions anyway, so they're just like, all right, who cares. I'm sure at the end of the show, there's a disclaimer that runs, nothing we say is true, you can't listen to us, and we're all fucked up.
Yeah, it's entertainment, it's an entertainment show. People that still watch it are brain dead and only care about celebrities, which, let's be honest, who cares? Well, you don't have to watch it anymore. All the other news agencies quote them.
Yeah. It's like how Half Wheel's like the official news source of cigars. Right. TMZ has become the official news source of everything.
That's right. How did that happen? That guy's got to be worth billions now. He could have bought her music.
Maybe. That would have, yeah, actually. So how long has Britney Spears been in the game? Ever since I was 13 years old.
So like 40 years ago? No, probably about 25 years ago. Yeah, I mean, she started on the Mickey Mouse clip, right? And then where she started?
Originally. I'm only 27 years old, so this is like you guys. Right, yeah, we know. You don't even know who Britney Spears is, probably.
Yeah, as soon as she got done with Mickey Mouse Club, oops, I did it again, here she comes. Right. She run around as a half-dressed cheerleader. Yeah, which was great.
Now she just runs around naked. Yeah, isn't that? All the money. Right.
Now her ex and her, does she even on Facebook? They probably don't allow her on Facebook. So her ex and her Instagram is basically naked with a finger on a nipple. That's really what her pictures are anymore.
Yeah, that's Brittany. And I thank her for every single one of them. Oh, do you? Yes, personally, I thank her.
That's how you know the career is dying is when you have to resort to OnlyFans, essentially. She's probably not on OnlyFans. OnlyFans content. Oh.
I don't think she's actually on OnlyFans, she just sold all her music for a hundred million dollars or something, so I heard. So do you think she needed the money or she just wanted to cash out? Well, she's been doing it for so long, I mean, at that point, why not? Why not just sell it?
Get a big paycheck for it. Yeah, get the money all in one time. Wait. Her royalties aren't going to really last forever.
Like, your music eventually is going to become less and less popular. Sure. Like, less streamed, so to say. Right, right.
That's the term we use now. So, I mean, make as much money as you can now. What was that face for? Because he's old.
I'm old. You still go on there and pay for the song. I get it. Yeah, he buys CDs.
I have a jukebox in my house. I feed quarters. " I thought she divorced herself, for lack of a better word, from her father. Well, she did have a court case.
Right, conservatorship is what her dad had on her. Yes, but also, you know, Trump wasn't on the Epstein Island, so we can say anything we want now. That was Cigar Guys, just by the way, in case you're listening, Mr. President, he watches our show.
He's a very big fan. Yeah, huge, huge, huge, huge. So you're right. I mean, if you cash out now for a hundred million, if you waited, and I mean, I don't know, you hear about how this money comes in for these celebrities.
Sometimes it's a nickel, sometimes it's a dollar. Yeah, I have a, I have a buddy that's been in a whole bunch of different movies, like the American Pie movies, Jack Reacher, like all those type of movies. Was he the apple pie? Was that his part in the movie?
No, he was the guy on the jet skis in the American Wedding. Oh. I remember there being jet skis. I don't remember your friends particularly.
Well, yeah, he was one of the bully kids that I got in the fight with and all that. Oh, gotcha. So, he gets residuals. Right.
And what's funny is on his Instagram page now, what he has done on his reels is he's come up with this thing of, it's called like residual Thursday, and he shows everybody his residuals that he gets all the time. all the time it's like 25 cents 50 cents yeah you know but it's like a hundred and some movies right you know so like every thursday it racks up to you know 75 dollars i'm like well i had a lot of money okay so it's 25 cents that was for one movie right yep yep so i'm like man i was like you know it kind of sucks that it's only 25 cents for one movie or something um what's what's the What's the guy's name? Who is the dad in Yellowstone? I can't think of his name.
Kevin Costner. Kevin Costner. I saw a clip of him on a talk show and they were talking about residual. He goes, so, you know, I brought this last group of checks in.
So he's reading them and it's for like Waterworld, Bull Durham. I mean, movies that you know the names of. It added up to $9. Yep.
And then he goes, they spent more on the envelopes and the postage so that I could get a total of $9. Yep. Yep. That's, yeah, that's exactly what my buddy Jesse says.
He's like, I don't know why they don't just direct deposit the money. Yeah. You know, every time I get a dollar, you can mail it to me. Yeah.
You know, save it up. Right. Maybe for accounting purposes. Maybe they just have to get it in and out.
We gotta get it in and out so we don't pay taxes on it. I wish we got residual money. I mean, I'd take 25 cents. On this show?
Yeah. One zero. Yeah, right. One zero.
All right, so let's move on here. We got a little more information about how to make money, but who cares? All right, dream job. This is a dream job.
Netflix is willing to pay a private flight attendant, guess how much? This is actually something that is posted that they are trying to hire for. A hundred grand a year. A hundred and twenty-five.
Three hundred and eighty-five thousand dollars. I'm in. They have to be female. They're willing to pay three hundred and eighty-five thousand dollars to a primary flight attendant, I'm assuming female, but it doesn't say, because they can't say that.
I'm going to apply. Who wants to join the dream crew on a super mid-size private jet based out of San Jose, California, a Gulfstream G550. Here's the catch. How big is that, Alex?
What, the cigar guys? It's mid-size. Mid-size. It's bigger than ours.
Bigger than yours? Yeah. All right, what are you going to say over there, Phil? Here's the catch.
It's going from San Jose? Is that what you said? It's in San Jose, California. It's going all over.
Well, it flies over. That's where it's based out of. No, no, it doesn't fly all over. It's going from San Jose to Epstein Island, but you get three hundred and some odd thousand dollars.
I mean, you just have to be in the club. I don't know if the island's still... Yeah, I don't think the island... I mean, I guess it has to have an airport on it.
I saw like a TikTok reel of somebody that like infiltrated... Oh, I saw that! Epstein's Island. Yeah, the guy's like running between buildings trying not to get caught.
Yeah. Brave man. Right. Respect.
Right. Didn't accomplish anything, but... I mean, we all watched the video, so… It was almost like a ding-dong ditch. Yeah.
Oh, I touched it. I hope he at least made some money off that video or something. All right. I'm sure.
According to the job description, you have to be discreet flight attendant. Oh, see, here it comes. Be able to demonstrate a professional representation of Netflix aviation, operate with little direction and a lot of self-motivation, And then they'd be able to endure a varied work schedule, including domestic and international travel and holiday workdays and extended travel period. And not objectionable to anything we say.
Well, as I said, discreet seems to be the part that scares me a little bit. Is there an age requirement on there? No. Oh my God.
Yes, 30 to 35. 30 to 35, blonde, double E. Super specific. Super specific.
Blue eyes, one foot bigger than the other. Hopefully you have a Facebook picture with your finger over your boobies like Britney Spears. Britney Spears-like photo. Britney Spears-like photo.
Britney's going to apply for this next. She's probably going to make more money than her music is now. So apparently Netflix has 30 offices around the world including in London, Madrid, and Tokyo. And the minimum pay for the job is $60,000 and the most is $385,000.
So I guess if you're like a five... They're gonna give me $60,000 and they're gonna give Brittany $385,000. Brittany get $385,000, right. Yeah, you know how this works, right?
" So, $60,000. By experience, I mean your discretion is a little bit questionable? Yeah, nobody's getting the $300,000. My mouth is too big.
Right. Discretion is iffy. You know what? We like you.
65. I didn't really say it's so many offices. Why do they need all those offices for? I don't know.
Everything's digital. Right. It's a great question. Why do they need 30 offices around the world?
Maybe it's the new, instead of Epstein Island, it's Epstein Office. Netflix? Yeah. I mean, Netflix is...
Netflix and chill mean something completely different now? Netflix is very controversial in what they put out for just the kids' shows alone. Oh, do they? I don't watch any of the kids' stuff.
I don't watch any of the kids stuff. I hope not, but there's a statistic where... I mean, I don't like... I have a deal.
I don't like movies with talking animals or cartoons. I don't watch those anymore. Really? " What about talking vegetables?
No. Wait, wait, wait. You don't do talking animals? Why did Mr.
Ed ruin it for you? Yes. Ever since then, I found out it was not real. I can't watch it anymore.
Oh, God. Wilbur. See, Mr. Ed was a black and white show, Alex, back in the 50s.
Thank you for filling me in. Where a horse would just flop his gums and they would have some guy off set just talking. They couldn't even dub it because they didn't have the technology. Well, he wasn't really off set.
You could see him in the camera. Wait, one second, one second. You were alive in the 50s? Oh, yeah.
No, but I was born in the 60s, so they were still playing. Back when TV was only in black and white. How were their residuals at that time? They were a lot better.
That's better. Dead horse is a millionaire today. It's still alive. He sold the rights in advance, too, so he's got tons of money.
Yep. I mean, I know there is a Netflix for each country, and they only play movies from that country. I guess that's why they put it. It's digital.
Couldn't they run it from one place in El Paso or whatever it was? Well, maybe the office is actually, they say it's an office, but maybe it's a... Just a room? Well, yeah.
Well, it's like a building where they keep all the... Dirty movies. No, Jesus Christ. No, the things that store all the information.
The Britney Spears. Yeah. The data sites. Oh, yeah, what's it called?
4. Yeah, Data Cloud or whatever. Yeah, whatever they're called. Servers.
Servers, there you go. Yeah, data servers. Maybe that's what it is. Maybe they have to have, you know, because they probably do have a lot of content because you got to think how much content is a two hour movie and how many movies do they have And then they have in different languages and, you know, all that good stuff, so maybe that's what it is.
Somebody's gotta hit that dub button for the words. Right. Is that how it works? Yeah.
There's one guy. Types it all in as the movie's going. Yeah. Just types away.
Watch this, I'm gonna really mess with them. Is that why it's, like, messed up sometimes? Like, I'm looking at the captions, I'm like, wait a minute. Right, 'cause it's the wrong word?
Or, like, it's too slow? I hate when that happens. Well, that's because you get a Spanish-speaking guy that can only speak some Spanish. Oh.
Yeah, you know, he's like Spanish and English. So if he doesn't know the word, he just gibberish. Right. The Spanglish translate.
Yono se tractor. Right. They're not gonna know what it is, they don't speak English. Put that word in.
Amazon has the worst closed captioning, I think. Amazon Prime. I don't know if you watch anything on Amazon Prime. Well, yeah, I mean, they have some halfway decent stuff, but it is the worst streaming service.
Yeah, it's very specific case scenario where I'm like, Amazon Prime. Right. So, I agree with you on that. There are some good movies on it, but usually not.
And then there's one that does a lot of Indian movies. Is that Netflix? It's probably like Tubi or something. No, no, it's one of the major ones.
No. I think Netflix does have a category just for like Bollywood. It shows up here. Yeah.
Like who's watching all that here? Indians. We don't... Probably Greg.
Craig, you know, he's very outdoorsy, very, uh, very international. Yeah. Right. Maybe that's his next trip.
India? Yeah. It's very dirty. I wouldn't want to go.
Yeah. So I hear, no offense for Indian fans. Yeah, see, I'm the racist. For Indian fans.
No offense at all. I mean, we don't, we don't mock your accent on this show, uh, four times a week, so. No, we don't. I'll put it this way.
Of all the content I've seen that comes out of India. Yes. There's a lot of stuff going. I haven't seen anything appealing.
Right. Oh, there you go. That's a nice way to put it. Yeah.
I'm like the PR guy. I'm with him. That's why they're the number one rated show. He said.
We used to be... We don't say racist things, you say racist adjacent. Ah. We used to be very PR, but now we just don't give a...
Well, yeah. Eight years, eight years, they don't care. Five shows a week, it's not like they're gonna catch it. Yeah.
Exactly. We're spattering them with content they can't find at all. Opus Clip This. Right.
But that's just it. Opus Clip grabs the stuff you don't want anybody to hear the second time. Right. I have noticed that lately.
And I don't think Mikey polices it. I think it just goes. No. That would take time.
Phil, did you guys cover the story yesterday from El Paso, Texas, where they're closing the airport for 10 days? No. Did you guys skip that? It was in there.
I, nope. Don't remember it all. Well, El Paso, Texas closed their airport for 10 days, no apparent reason, no rhyme, they're not saying. Interesting.
Oh yeah, yeah, this is the one with the airspace. Yes, yes, the airspace over El Paso and the airport has been closed. Yeah, no, yeah, we did go over that. Okay, so apparently it was not covered in that story.
It is from drone activity in the area from the cartels. Oh, I was correct. Is that what you said? I said drones.
Yes, for excessive drone in Mexico. Yeah, Willie was talking about Area 51 and stuff. No, no aliens, Willie, very sorry. Well, that's in Nevada.
Nevada. Right. He's not that tall. He doesn't understand things.
Is that how it works? Height correlates with IQ? No, geography. Well, as the body was growing, the brain and everything stopped.
So he's shorter, right? So everything stopped growing. Yeah, it's kind of like a plant. As a plant gets bigger and taller, it looks better and everything.
Well, it's like data storage is smaller the thing, the less you can put in it. It makes sense. So I'm like average intelligence. Right.
Right. Sure. But maybe you're smarter than most because... And Boots is super smart because look how big he is.
If you... Yeah, yeah. Big head. Yeah, if you...
Actually, Palmer has a bigger head than me. Yep, we found out yesterday. We were trying on the new hat. Right.
Because the mask doesn't even cover his entire face. Well, that's Palmer's design. Yeah. And I get tired of putting stickers on.
I'm like, that's enough. I'm done. These are not good. You can't put a flat sticker on a round surface, apparently.
It's very hard to do. Yeah. Yeah, there's like a little crease in there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, little bubbles and things, and I was like, eh, fucking done.
Nope. All right, in Chihuahua, Mexico, it's a small town in northern Mexico, the way in which hundreds of birds known as yellow-headed thrushes have died, they're flying head-first into the ground at full speed. What? Oh, so they've converted to Islamic birds.
No, that's Japanese. Sorry. Oh, yeah, Japanese. Oh, yeah, if they were Islamic, they'd blow up.
Let's get on with it. Let's be real little people, if you're going to be a racist, at least be a correct racist. Mikey's never leaving again. Are you sure this isn't the Patreon show?
So they have recorded these birds coming in and just dive bombing and hitting the ground. And it snaps their necks. Geez. Really?
It snaps their necks, huh? So if birds are committing suicide, like, how bad is life actually for us? Just this one town. Are we just numb to it?
It's just this one town. Yeah, I heard the bird economy there, it's horrible. So, it was on February 7th, it was all on one day. They all just .
. They knew something that we don't know. Well, they are saying that images captured by security cameras show they're crashing to the ground and dying while others agonize or resume flight. So, all of them did die.
Some of them got back up and flew again. But they're thinking that there was some type of other animal chasing them, a bird that eats these type of birds, I guess. The birds, I guess. And in an attempt to get away, they were dive bombing the ground and some of them, I guess, couldn't pull up at the last minute.
One against 30? Well, there might be a flock of them. Who knows? Yeah, this sounds like a Stephen King book.
This is gonna be like in a documentary in 10 years, I will see. Yeah, right. On February 7th. Unless the world ends and you have to go to the moon before then.
Yeah, I met Elon. Mr. Elon, I would like to go, please. Me and my wife, if you can take the wife, that'd be fine.
He can't take my wife. My wife could go with us. That's what it sounded like you offered your wife. Yeah, I know what I did.
After I said it, I'm like, wait a minute. Did I just bark at my wife on the spot on the moon? All right, many believe this could be a flock persecuted by predatory birds and are trying to avoid it. They hit the soil.
Ooh. Hopefully it was soft wherever in India it was, or I don't know where this was. See, these birds normally fly from the United States to Canada to Mexico to spend the winter. Once cold subsides, they return to the north.
Well, these guys aren't going back. Some of them aren't. Yeah, a few, I guess, made it, but most of them... They can make it.
The picture's terrible. There's like all these splattered birds and the birds are black except for their yellow heads. So now we have bird-on-bird violence. Yeah.
Yes. The numbers are skyrocketing. We have or have not gone to the moon. We're not going to Mars.
That's completely out of the picture and now birds are crashing. Maybe the birds... All the signs are pointing to the world is ending. Maybe that's why we're going to the moon.
Maybe it's part of the thing. Maybe Elon likes yellow-headed thrushes. That sounds weird. Well, you never know.
He's from a different country. You don't know what they eat there. All right, moving on to Cigar. Oh, do you have a video?
You don't have a video. Of course not. Why would you have a video? A video?
Mikey likes me asking if he has a video, and then he gives us these really weird videos that I have to insert into the show that he thinks are funny, and that we don't. Watch this. You just put anything you want in there. Yeah.
That's basically what we do. " Yeah. Oh, he actually watches it on the show? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
We all three, he will send it to the two of us. We all three watch it on the show, and then he wants to talk about it. " I think what we should do is just pretend to watch a video, and then the video is this episode being played. Being put back in again?
Oh, wouldn't that be funny? But it still involves editing. Ugh. Oh, yeah.
All right, three new Opus Purple Rain cigars are coming later this year. Purple Rain? Purple Rain. Oh.
For the last eight years, Prometheus has only offered a single Opus Purple Rain, Vitola 6 and 7 8 x 44 Lonsdale, with a pre-cut Torpedo cap. Later this year, they're doing three of them. What? I remember there was a big hype around the Purple Rain previously.
Yeah, I really, I'm sorry, I've never smoked Fuente. Me neither. Oh, Fuente, or Purple Rain? Fuente, period.
Just in general. You've never smoked a Fuente? This is, I'm talking about, this is where I first started smoking cigars. Oh, they're Dominican, he hates Dominicans.
The people and the cigars. So, after about two years, there's this guy that comes there, his name is Robbie Doyle. I'm sure you know Robbie. At least heard of him.
Right, Discount Doyle. I know Robbie. He likes to find shops and rip them off for their open cigars. Jesus.
Resell them at a higher price to people that don't know any better. Oh, man, I should go into business with him, that sounds great. Oh my God. It's a great business model, I'm sure you have better access than he does.
That is true. You can find me on... com. Right.
So... Backslash cigarguys. He smokes 858s, right? I was like, man, he's always trying to give me one.
I was like, nah, man, I'm good, I'm not gonna smoke Fuente. It's just not my... You're just turning down cigars? Yeah, it's just not my type of thing, you know?
Like, whatever. It just doesn't smell good. I always take them, because then you can just re-gift them. Yeah, you can trade them up for something else.
I don't know. Those ones, I just really just feel like I don't want to do that to my friends. It's Dominican. He doesn't like the people or the cigars.
I didn't say that. And then he asked for a Saint-Pare cigar earlier. Was that Dominican? Yeah.
Did you know that, Phil? Listen, what Palmer is saying is not completely true. Yeah, he just knows they cost a lot. No, no, I mean...
You have said on this show you don't like Dominican cigars. First of all, I would always support my boy Sweeney. Well, taking a free cigar isn't really supporting your boy Sweeney. Well, I didn't sell you a cigar.
Yeah, you'd have to pay for it. I bought one when they were here. Anyways, let's get back to the story. Because what Palmer said was only halfway true.
There's some Dominican scars I do not like. But he doesn't like Dominican people about that part. No. He takes half of my insult away.
I feel like this whole show is a psyop. He takes the wrong half of my insult away. anyways so he goes like i was seeing this purple rain all over facebook so i was like because i was in a bizarre leaf whatever it's called he thought so i was like you know purple rain that's prince i really want to try this thing so i tell robbie i was like yo give me a purple rain he's like man that's a hard cigar to find i'm like building up the price right there yeah exactly yeah i said He said, listen, Robbie, I'm not paying for this cigar, first of all, and I will give you, I will trade you. Yeah, yeah.
You know, he's like, okay, whatever. So, he finally found me one. It was really hard to find. I took two puffs, and I threw it in the ashtray.
You're lying. I swear. I promise you. And he'll tell you the same story.
Dude, there was so much hype around those cigars. To be fair, to your point, I had been smoking Opus on and off, like just to try different stuff, and there was nothing that kind of stood out to me in terms of what I was paying for. The only cigar that I had recently was their Tempo de Oro, that came out, the one with the gold, like, that one was actually really good. That was a really good cigar.
The only one that I really like from Fuente is the, what is it, Casa de Cuba? Oh, that's a great cigar, yeah. Yeah, I like that. 12 bucks, probably 15 now, but.
Yeah, I'll smoke that because we smoked that on the show, so it wasn't bad. Oh, so it was free. Yeah, no, it was free. He was supporting us.
They're supporting us. Yeah. Let's see where we at. All right, they're doing a Heaven and Earth Purple Rain, a 54, 7 1/2 by 54, a Fuente Fuente Heaven and Earth Purple Rain, 6 1/4 by 56, and a Heaven and Earth Purple Rain Diedema 58, 5 1/2 by 60.
Big boys. Oh, big cigars. All right, a special little tobacco, blah, blah, blah. It's magic.
Everybody loves it. Blah, blah, blah. Lighters and stuff. All right, they're selling a big box.
I'm trying to get to the big box part. I like big boxes. A big box. I don't understand the 60 ring gauge thing this whole year.
Oh, see, 60 is the bigger one. No, no, I understand that. You mean the hype around 60 ring gauges? Yeah, like last year, this was a thing.
" Everybody's asking for bigger cigars this year, it's true. Who's everybody? The shop owners. They're like, "How big a cigar?
" And then you tell them, and they go, oh, we're, I got guys who like big ones. 52? Is it for value? Like, is it a value smoke?
I think so, yeah. Everything goes around. Like, a couple of years ago, Lanceros. Everybody was making Lanceros.
Everybody loved Lanceros. Everybody's making Connecticut. Sierra, Connecticut came out. Everybody loves Connecticut.
Yeah, because like a, like, dude, I do not smoke 60 ring gauge. No. Right. Unless it's box press, then it's more like a 54.
Yeah. I'll smoke a 60 ring gauge, like, box press. That's a little different. But no, I'm not a 60 ring gauge guy.
Yeah, I don't either, I don't like the big ones either. Right. I'm just, yeah, again, must be for the value. All right, these giant humidors, they have 106 Opus X cigars and a copy of Arturo Fuentes' book.
Oh, apparently he wrote a book about the company. How much is the humor, guys? I didn't give you a lot of information, so just throw numbers. 3,500.
Well, the book is priceless, so I'm gonna go... Priceless. $8,000. $12,975.
$12,975. Yeah, their prices are just absolutely ridiculous. They said 25 up Mount in December, the other 25 are coming out here soon. So you guys still have a chance.
Oh, they're coming to Hustler? No, we're not getting one here. Oh. That's what I thought.
Either 25 are coming here. No, no, no. They're coming out. Oh, okay.
So you can go over probably to Cathedral and get one over there. I've never been there. You've never been to Cathedral? Nope.
Oh, you should go at least once. Oh, you should go at least once. It's like Disney World. You should go one time.
Is it only Fuente Cigars? Not only, but it's a Fuente shop, basically, but they have other stuff there. Well, if they have other stuff, maybe I'll go. But if there's only Fuente, you're losing me.
No Pastaña. I'll bring them in my pocket. Not allowed to smoke them there. Careful.
I take the band off. " They have a house cigar there that's pretty good that's not outlandishly expensive. Yeah? Yeah, actually, their house cigars are pretty good.
House cigars are pretty good. All right, Espanola Anversario 30 Years is debuting at the PCA 2026. Espanola. The problem is, they say the PCA 2026 is in March.
Oh, it's not. No, it's in April. I double-checked. Yeah, it's April, like, 17th, I think is the first day.
Yeah, 17th through something. So is it PCA or is it TPE? Here's a TPE. It says PCA.
TPE is March 31st. Yeah. Maybe they meant them. Could be.
The cigar that started it all for JM Tobacco and the Marucan family is marking its 30th anniversary this year and the company is celebrating with a limited edition release. So they're putting out two cigars. There's a Maduro that uses a Mexican San Andreas wrapper, a Dominican HBA binder, and fillers from the Dominican Republic and Pennsylvania. The company calls the Maduro blend rich and nuanced, delivering deep earth-toned sweet spice and complex layered character, a nod to classic Cuban-inspired craftsmanship.
Meanwhile, the Espanola Anniversario 30-year Habano uses an Ecuadorian Habano, Mexican San Andreas, and then Dominican Republic and Pennsylvania. You know what this cigar sounds like? It sounds like the base of cigar. Both blends, by the way.
Really? Habano and Mexican San Andreas. So if you want a similar experience, you can just get a base of cigar. At Cigar Hustler, by the way.
Yes. They sell them here. We sell them here. Boost can support us and buy some after the show.
He's supporting right now by smoking a free one. Yeah. You know what? That works.
This is a, I do like this size. Yeah. This is good. Is that the little one?
Yeah, the Rothschild, yeah. Oh. It wasn't enough for me. I mean, I enjoyed this cigar, but I wanted more.
I was like, oh, it's already a good one. Smoked two. You only gave me the one. I was just trying to support you.
There's more in the humidor. I don't pay for cigars. Right, we got, yeah, we do this show for free. Right, they got to do something.
It's not like, you know, they paid me a tremendous amounts of money. 25 cents. Do you describe your blend as bright and vibrant? No.
Oh, they do. It's better. Balanced spice, cedar, sweetness, and nuanced citrus notes? Actually, yes.
Oh. And a refi-ned expression of Dominican and Mexican tobacco. What's a refi-ned? Refined?
Oh, 34 cents. That makes a lot of sense. Yeah, there you go. So apparently there was a typo in Charlie's article.
Oh. Thanks, Charlie. It's because when he was eating the teriyaki noodles with the chopsticks. He got some on the screen.
I will say I can't read it, so I don't know if he's just not reading it correctly. No, no, it's R-E-F-I space N-E-D, and I just cut and paste. Yeah. Huh.
Cigars are slated to be on display at the 2026 PCA Convention and Trade Show in late March. So I think it is TP, I think it's what it's supposed to say. Maybe. It makes more sense, because that's in late March, you said.
Yeah. And it's slated to ship to stores in late April, which is during the actual PCA. Hmm. Either way, someone messed up.
That's kind of crazy, because... Well, it's the refined Neds, so, you know. Nobody's spending money in March. For the most part, I mean, they're waiting for...
Yeah, everybody's holding back, yeah. So they actually, they'll start at the end of February. Rip. Oh, you mean for show deals?
Well, they'll start. Well, we'll just wait till the show. Right. That's what I'm saying.
People are going to hold back. So it's like, why would you release this in March? Well, they probably releasing this at the show is what they mean. Let's say it is TPE and they release it there.
They're getting like early publicity, so to say. Right. And then they'll probably be at PCA anyway. Sure.
Or they just got the dates wrong. Well, it's JM Tobacco. Well, maybe they only do the TPE. They might not do PCA.
Yeah, I don't know who those guys are. I'll find out. We're going. You're going to TPE?
Yeah. Are you? Yeah. Well, are you showing at TPE, or are you guys going?
No, we're going as media. Okay. Yeah, we're getting... They practically get paid to go to TPE.
Or are you guys getting paid this year? Not practically, literally. Right. How do we do that?
Hey, Phil, you're the number one show. I mean, you get deals. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
This random person emailed me out of nowhere. " Did they send you the check? No, I just sent them an invoice, so we'll see. Maybe we're not going, who knows?
Maybe the order never comes. " Right. Can't wait to get the money from them after I scam them and give it all to CRA. I'm sorry.
It wasn't my chance an address up in New Hampshire, was it? No. David Garofalo Incorporated. Oh, he got ya.
He got ya. Dang. He hates not being the number one show, I gotta tell ya. He doesn't like when people say that.
To be fair, we signed the contract before we found out we were the number one show. Oh, did you? Oh, now you asked for more money. Unless they knew before us.
Oh, quick, get them on the paper now. They're the number one show, they don't know it yet. You know what, charge them double, let us go. We'll go with you guys.
Well, we just joined the show anyway, we get to go. Oh, yeah, we did do the show. True, true. You're the button pusher, and I carry the cords.
What do you think Mike's going to do? It's going to be like the last episode of Fresh Prince when he comes in tomorrow. And there's nobody here? Yeah, no one's here.
No, the equipment's not set up or anything? So sad. It's just a rug. I'm just upstairs ringing people up.
It's just a rug. You guys took the equipment, too? Well, we needed it. We needed it to expand the show.
We're not in his garage anymore, either. We needed a bigger space. We're using that TPE money. So, we rented out the studio next door again.
We kicked them out. Oh, my God. All right, there's a flavored tobacco ban proposed for Illinois. Oh.
Oh, this is for you. Okay, you guys hate flavored cigars. I forgot about that. All your videos...
All I'm hearing is good news. You hate. Oh, you're... It's good news.
Are you guys behind all these new things that are trying to... No, I don't have enough time and money for that. In all honesty, though, like, if you want to smoke infused cigars, go for it. I'll still make fun of you for the content.
Did you, did you start out with infused cigars? Me, no. No? Actually, my first cigar was a Padron 1926 Maduro.
Oh. Yeah. Oh. You got respect from Phil over there.
I'm very sorry. I have smoked a flavored cigar before, an infused cigar before. - But did not like it. - That was terrible.
- Which one did you have? - It was the acid blondie. - Oh, well, you picked the wrong one. - Are there good ones?
- Yes. - I'm not talking about Sweet Tip, by the way. That's different. - No, no, no.
I'm talking about infuse. - I don't like those. It goes away. They can find a way to Sweet Tip it through the entire experience, and then okay.
- You just gotta start deeper. - Wow. Let's move on from all that. - Mark, he got a little excited.
He doesn't know what to do now. All right, the bill was introduced last week by Senator Mary Edley Allen, a Democrat from Grace Slake, where that is, currently has no other sponsors, currently just California, Massachusetts, banned the sale of flavored tobacco products, your favorite states, I'm assuming. Wow. They gained some respect.
They gained some respect. That's my favorite. We only go to these states. Both states have different exemptions for some flavored cigar sales.
Let's see, SB 3148 does not appear to have any of those exemptions, so in Illinois, we flat out just, they're all done. None. Hmm. Okay.
I don't know. Illinois is a weird state, so. It is a weird state. My brother's up there right now.
Oh, is he? Yeah, under like- Is that where he lives? No, or something. Uh, for now, yeah.
Oh. Is that one of the other basic guys, or is that just your brother? No, my actual brother. Okay.
He's not Albanian. Right. God. Well, you're, well, yeah, you're not Albanian.
No. Right. That's okay. Makes sense.
Let's clear that for the record. Yeah. Right. He works at the Albanian cigar company and he's not Albanian.
It's hard to get out. Let's just say that. Well, he's like the head. If you think it's hard to get out of the cigar industry, imagine like the Albanian cigar industry.
Oh, you're never going to. It's like the mafia. I understand. It's by death.
Right. Right. We're scared of your partners. Just letting you know.
We'll miss you, Alex. Just carry on the Cigar Guys without me, you know? No problem. Right.
Well, it won't be number one anymore. It'll fall apart. It's okay. Hey, if I'm dead, I could care less.
But we won't care because we don't get paid then. How long does TP money last? We're back to not getting paid there, Phil, I don't know what to tell you. Alex is gone.
Well, no, in all honesty, like, the government of Illinois can screw themselves because even though I personally don't like flavored or infused cigars, I don't agree with this. Oh, you don't want them banned? No, I think it's ridiculous. And why?
Well, he thinks people just shouldn't smoke them. So, why ban something that people should not have? It should die naturally. Well, yeah, I mean, everything should die like that, but, you know, at the end of the day, like, so, Mikey's biggest argument with this type of stuff is always, if they start with infused cigars, then the next thing is, you know, regular cigars.
Right, exactly, like, give them an inch, they take a mile, so I think it should be completely off the table, like, they should not be doing this. Right. Yeah, like, you can't smoke infused cigars, but you can vape. Right.
Well, uh, vape is included in the outline of the flavored tobacco. Oh, vape? Yeah, vape is included in that. Is it tobacco?
No, it's not, but they include it in part of the thing, it's listed. Well, is it flavored vape or vape in general? Uh, I would imagine it's flavored vape. That's what they did with the Juul's, it's like, oh, you can't have mango pods anymore, and then people stop smoking 'em.
Right. Yeah, they're just gonna reclassify it. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
This isn't flavored. Well, the UTL for California actually has to be flavored stuff too, so like Sweet Jane's and that stuff is okay? No, no, it's not flavored. Right, because those aren't flavored.
It's anything that's like grape or orange. Well, that's why they replaced Acid Cigars with Sweet Jane. They're doing this shift right now. They're like Sweet Jane's becoming more popular than Acid Cigars.
I don't know if you noticed that. Oh. That's like their play right now. Yeah, because, well, what's the gentleman's name from CRA?
Scott Peirce. Scott Peirce. That's the guy that we talked to, right? Yep.
He's C-A-A. C-A-A. C-R-A is Joshua Bershka. Or no, he's P-C-A.
Yeah. I don't know who C-R-A is. C-R-A is the Rights of America. We talked to the gentleman, and he said that as long as the literature says it is flavored as candy, is what he said.
So if it's like a cherry candy flavored cigar. Or a cherry flavored hempy candy, anything that has a distinct flavor. Well, that's how they got around it, though, he said. Right, they got around it, well, that's how, like, the Sweet Janes get, not Sweet, yeah, Sweet Jane gets around it, it's not, it's, you know, pipe tobacco, it's not apple-flavored.
Right, they don't tell you. , it didn't say anything about being flavored. No, I didn't even know what it was. I just found out the other day, we got, the rep left one here, I took it home from my wife.
No, so they sent us a couple, and I read the blend, I'm like, this sounds really interesting. I think I might enjoy this. They said she asked them? As soon as I...
Yeah, I caught that too, Phil. It wasn't even lit. We don't even get free cigars sent to us. Yeah, how do you get cigars sent to you?
We're not even on that list. You guys don't get free cigars sent to you? No. Well, because, you know, they say, well, I got a humidor of them back there.
Oh, is that what it is? Guilty by association. Here we are. It's because, yeah, it's because there's that place upstairs that...
Right. I mean, they're going to send cigars. What do you mean? You already have my cigars.
Yeah, what do you need more for? Listen, if you'd like to send a cigar so we could try them on the show and tell everybody how great they are... Yep, I can easily slide those into the Patreon. I'm just giving you guys more reasons to join my show.
Yeah, apparently you can see them. Oh, and you get a little tick-tick. Do we get the ping lighters too? Do you get the tick-tick?
Oh yeah, we got this for free too. Yeah, he's got the ping. We've got the click. Yeah, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.
Right. They make us buy our own fuel. It's a very bootstrapped finance show here. Yeah, we actually got Keanu out there trying to get fuel out of the ground for us.
So you're in the oil business, too. We're trying to be in every business, whatever we need. All right, it's time for the industry's favorite game. Uh-oh.
After I say time for the industry's favorite game, we all say it together. Time for the industry's favorite game, what's the score? All right, today's cigar, because this is the minigame from February 11, 2026. Patrick LaGreed is the reviewer.
The Dominican Republic Cigar, the Kellner Cigar Company. This is the Kellner LE80. We want to let guests go first, or you want me to go first? No, you go first, because he's...
Just so you know, I went first yesterday, and I did beat Willie on the first one, then Mikey had to do another one, and he tied me. So really, I won. Right, because it should only have been a one thing. Yeah, he did a...
He did a double? Yeah, the second one they did was the SPC. Oh, that's stupid. That's what I said.
I was like, well, I mean, there's a, there's a damn shirt with the score on it that we sell. Right. So anyways, who, so who won the second game? He did.
Willie? Yeah. Oh, I thought you meant Mikey. He was like, how does he, yeah, Shirley?
No, Willie, Willie won. Willie's got a shirt. Anyway, what do you guys pick a score? All right.
Um, 84. 94. Ooh, really? All right.
Cigar Reviews, the Kellner LE80 is from the Dominican Republic. The factory is Kellner Cigars. They have their own factory. Wrappers, Ecuador and Habano.
Binder. Ooh, they're not saying. Filler, not saying. Length.
It's a 7 by 50. MSRP, $57 a stick. Oh, we're paid for that cigar. Came out in December of 2025, so this is a new review.
They made 2,000 cigars. Boxes of release 2,000, boxes of 10, 20,000 total cigars released, they smoked three for the review. Sometimes there's a redux, I only smoke one. Now you have an opportunity to change your score, now that you know what it's made out of.
I'll do 92, because it's half wheel. All right. I mean, he's not wrong, but... The score the other day was 77, just letting you know.
Yeah. This company is not around anymore. Yes, it is. They just released a cigar in December of last year.
A 50, this is an LE? This is an LE. Still 53, 50 whatever dollars. Over $30 is crazy.
Oh, how much is the Samprana? Over $30. There you go. Wow.
I guess you're not supporting your boy, Sweeney. I mean, he knows. We've talked. But I do like the cigar.
I just think the price is nuts. I've advised him on his pricing, now it's a little hot. No, no, no, no. He says, what are you, poor?
Wow. No, man, I got to go down on this. I got to go to 82. 82.
94. Okay, clue number one. The long perfecto format and oily wrapper made for a visually impressive cigar. The auburn and gold tones in different lighting paired beautifully with the band, giving it a distinct, elegant presentation.
I'll stick with 92. Phil? Um, 82. Ooh, it's going down.
Clue number two, the second third was the clear high point, balanced, creaminess, and integrated spice notes in a complex mix of flavors, all working in harmony. When it clicked, it was refined, layered, and generally enjoyable. Mmm, 93. Ooh.
You think because he enjoyed it? That he scored it high? Yeah. Oh, yeah, first, first timers.
Yeah. I'll go, you know what? I'll play his game. I'll go to 83.
Ooh, a 10 point difference. Yeah. Clue three, the final third loss nuance becoming increasingly charred and pepper heavy on the finish with some burn and combustion issues, especially in the third sample, which took away from the earlier Fair, balance, and finesse. 87.
Oh, you have now come to my world. Hmm. 83. All right, final thought.
The Kellner LE 80 was a real Goldilocks experience for me, both among the three cigars and within nearly each one. I was a bit concerned by the first cigar's performance, as while decent, it felt flat and lacking the kind of dynamic profile I would have expected, The second one brings things to the point I was expecting, thanks to a rich, nuanced, and involving flavor profile, highlighted by a fantastic second third. Then the third cigar splits the difference, better than the first, but not as good as the second. While I love a great cigar, I appreciate consistent one just as much, even if the flavor might be a bit more pedestrian.
As such, it is a bit heavy. Hesitant to offer a full recommendation on the cigar, mainly because for such, I would want someone to have the experience I had with the second cigar, I'm a bit afraid they'll get the experience of the first. The gamble might be worth it, but just be ready for a cigar that could easily fall on either side of the expectation. For 50-something dollars.
I'm gonna go with 86. It's a very pedestrian cigar. What does that mean? It means it's very, uh, normal, pedestrian, it's nothing special.
I just want to know what's wrong with this palate. Oh. This is Patrick, he's, uh... He's a great rider.
They're all great riders. Yeah, but, uh... Keep it to Thorish right there next to their desk where they're typing. Yeah, they gotta come up with a different...
It's probably just ChattyVT, let's be honest. Well, uh, yeah, 'cause it just came out, so it could be good. Yeah, um... Say a bunch of things that are nice and then say something bad.
So, this is the final thought? That was the final thought. Okay. This is your final score.
You're at 86. You said 86. I'm 86. 85.
Taw, you. All right, how often do you look at Half Wheel? Oh, he knows the score? No, I don't.
I haven't seen this review. I've smoked a cigar. Oh, have you? So that's why I was rating it so high, but when I heard his review, I came down, but I have not seen their review.
All right, it's 86. First timer. Good. That was good.
Because there you started. That's why when you started in the 90s and then you hit it right on the money. I'm like, wait a minute. This is the first time Phil has been defeated.
It is not. Well, by a newcomer. Oh, yeah. Yeah, Mikey and me, I mean, that game goes on forever.
Right back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. Yeah. Alright, what day does your show come out on? Does it come out on the same day, every week?
Every Saturday at 5pm is when our show premieres, The Cigar Guys, everywhere. Just look up The Cigar Guys and you'll find it. It's at the top, number one. Yeah, usually.
Yeah, it's at the top of the rating, so it's easy to find. Depending on where you look up, you know, but it'll be there. Unlike our show that comes out every single day. Except for Saturday and Sunday.
Okay, every single weekday at 5am. So you can watch his show on Saturdays. Yeah, we fill the gap. We did that just for that.
We fill the gap, exactly. Yeah, we had to leave at least a couple days with other people. Well, Mike, he's not available on the weekend, so we couldn't do that. I'm not supposed to tell him that.
What? You just leave it at, we left it, you know, a couple days with other people. The only day I get off is Saturday, so. Yeah, that's true.
Because on Sunday, I have to do the show for Monday, which we recorded on Friday. Right. And people wonder why I never know what day of the week it is. On the 25th, I will be at Northport Cigars down in Northport, Florida, And having a Postana event there for one till whenever people stop showing up.
Hmm, that's great. On the 25th, I'll be at Cigars on the Avenue with Saint-Pare Cigars from 5 to 7. Oh, look at you. On what day?
Same day. The 25th? 25th. Oh, I didn't, oh yeah, Sweeney did say it because he was wanting to do the show.
Uh, yeah, that's great. I think I'm gonna go to that. Okay. Oh, if he can come in and do the show, that fills you guys.
Is he coming during that time? Yeah, he was talking about, um, he was coming down soon and he wanted, I asked him when he could come down and do the show. He said he's coming down soon. The problem is he has to do the show when somebody's not here.
Well, kind of. Kick someone out. Well, that's good, because then I don't have to do the show that day if he can do it that day. Because if I have to be there at 1:00, I have to leave here at...
Well, maybe Mikey won't show up that day. Well, no, he has to, otherwise, because I have to be going by like 10:30. Oh. That's on a Saturday, 20:00?
No, no, it's like a Wednesday. Oh, okay. Wednesday. All right, guys.
Thank you very much. We gotta go. Bye. Later, later.
Show Notes
On Todays Show Elon Musk has returned Mars and now wants the moon. Britany Spears is in the money! Netflix has its on flight attendants? In Chiwawa Mexico Birds are dying to get in! And in Cigars Opus is making it rain purple, ESPAÑOLA ANIVERSARIO cigar is having its own PCA? No tutie fruity cigars in Illinois and then finally a what’s the score!