Episode 119. Don't Eat The Poop!, I said a School of Salmon! Hail Hydra!!

Episode Summary

Episode 119 of A Cigar Hustler's Podcast finds Mike and Mike ("Mike Squared") recording from the lounge during the spring 2020 COVID-19 shutdown. After an opening stretch of home-improvement talk — cabinet hardware, drill guides, and a thin-brick fireplace project — plus a rundown of the kids' reading list (Michael Jordan, Muhammad Ali, D-Day) and ESPN's "The Last Dance," the hosts get into a genuinely news-heavy industry segment.

The two big cigar stories: Glynn Loope, the longtime executive director and public face of Cigar Rights of America, announced he will step down on November 4, 2020 — the day after the election — with CRA spending six months finding a replacement while Loope stays on as a lifetime member. Second, and bigger, Imperial Brands has agreed to sell its entire premium cigar business for $1.33 billion in two stages, to two little-known entities: Gemstone Investment Holding and Allied Cigar Corporation. The hosts walk through what's included — Tabacalera USA (Altadis U.S.A., Casa de Montecristo, JR Cigar), Flor de Copán, Vegafina, and 50% stakes in Habanos S.A. and related Cuban joint ventures — and marvel at the math: a division producing roughly $99 million in profit selling for an ~11.8x EBITDA multiple. That sparks a long riff about who actually has $1.3 billion, shell companies, Ozark-style cartel money, and a running "Hail Hydra" bit joking that Loope is secretly behind it all (plus Mike putting the shop up for sale at $75 million).

The back half is pandemic-era miscellany. A new sponsor read for the Superstrike rechargeable flashlight, then Australian doctors on the Coronacast podcast warning that COVID-19 may be transmissible via flatulence and aerosolized feces ("keep your pants on as PPE"). Georgia's Governor Brian Kemp reopens gyms, salons and restaurants in phases; Las Vegas Mayor Carolyn Goodman tells MSNBC to reopen casinos and let competition sort out the sick ones; Florida's Ron DeSantis is expected to loosen restrictions around May 1. Locally, Epic Theatres in Volusia County painted a screen on the side of the building for drive-in showings of The Karate Kid, The Great Outdoors, The Breakfast Club and Pretty in Pink. They also cover unverified reports of Kim Jong-un's death, Publix buying surplus milk and produce from Florida farmers for Feeding America — which triggers a callback to last week's Alec Bradley rant about brands publicizing their own good deeds — a Chinese takeout disaster involving a missing "school of salmon" sashimi order, and a tabloid story about an Irish man posing as a leprechaun. Listener of the Week is Douglas Pendleton (@ramblerguyky) for the Starz/Outlander recommendation, followed by a Power spin-off debate.

In This Episode

1. 01
   Quarantine home projects and reading with the kids
   Cabinet hardware installs, a thin-brick fireplace plan, and teaching the kids about Michael Jordan, Muhammad Ali and D-Day during lockdown.
2. 02
   Glynn Loope stepping down from Cigar Rights of America
   The CRA's longtime executive director will leave on November 4, 2020, with the organization spending six months searching for a replacement.
3. 03
   Imperial Brands sells premium cigars for $1.33 billion
   Gemstone Investment Holding and Allied Cigar Corporation are buying Tabacalera USA, Altadis, Casa de Montecristo, JR Cigar, Flor de Copán, Vegafina and 50% of Habanos S.A. in a two-stage deal.
4. 04
   Podcast boom and equipment shortages
   With everyone launching a show during lockdown, microphones are sold out and cigar-industry guests are being booked back-to-back.
5. 05
   Superstrike rechargeable flashlight sponsor read
   A live read for the show's newest sponsor — a 90,000 candlepower, 500-meter-throw flashlight originally developed for firefighters.
6. 06
   COVID-19, farts and aerosolized feces
   Australian doctors on the Coronacast podcast suggest pants count as PPE and warn about toilet plume and fecal-oral transmission.
7. 07
   Reopening the economy: Georgia, Vegas and Florida
   Brian Kemp's phased Georgia reopening, Carolyn Goodman's plan to reopen Vegas casinos, and hopes DeSantis loosens Florida rules by May 1 so the lounge can reopen.
8. 08
   Publix, Feeding America and the press-release problem
   Publix buying surplus Florida milk and produce for food banks reignites the hosts' argument about companies announcing their own charity.
9. 09
   Drive-in movies, Kim Jong-un rumors and Listener of the Week
   Epic Theatres' painted-wall drive-in in Volusia County, unverified reports of Kim Jong-un's death, a bad Chinese takeout run, and shout-outs to Douglas Pendleton.

Brands & Cigars Discussed

Linked items are in our shop. Mentions without a link aren’t currently stocked or couldn’t be matched with confidence.

Transcript

Hey, I'm Mike Too. This is Cigar Hustler Podcast Episode 119. This week, don't eat the poop. I said a school of salmon and, uh, hail Hydra.

I'll listen more this week on a Cigar Hustler Podcast. Is all that out of the chat? We've already started, it's too late now anyway. But that's out, right?

Yes. Mike Square. Mike Square. Welcome to episode 119 of a Cigar Hustlers Podcast.

Cigar Hustlers Podcast. So, how you been, Michael? I'm doing great, Mike. I did nothing over the weekend, except another six-hour mow the yard day.

Ooh, more about, how do you do it again? How do you do it again? I mow the yard once a week. Really?

You don't mow your grass once a week? It depends upon the season, and right now it's... It's the spring. It's growing.

Yeah, I don't think so. Yeah. I didn't cut the back. I only cut the front this week.

So, it's like a mullet. Yeah, short the front and long in the back. Yeah. It took me a minute to figure out where you were going with that.

I did not cut the grass today, this week. I am so ready for this to be done. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, no shit. Jesus Christ. Um, we did uh, what did we do? We did stuff.

We did. There's no holiday. We did cabinets. Oh, that's right.

You put cabinet hardware on, which I did two weeks before. Yes. Yeah, I was, uh, yeah. You know, my wife has been doing all of it pretty much by herself.

Oh, right, right. " You know, I have these plastic guides you put up on the door. Yeah, we did that. Oh, did you get those too?

Oh, it makes a huge difference. Oh, yeah. It was amazing. Well, because then I'm not measuring every single time.

But the drill bit in itself was messed up. Oh, my little guides came with the drill bit. Yeah, the drill bit that came with the guide? Yeah.

It was missing the tip. Oh, look at that little tip you put right in the hole. Yeah. So, that wasn't happening.

So, yeah, unfortunately. So, what I did was, I just replaced the bit, she just marked the cabinets and I just drilled this one. And, man, makes it, yeah. Yeah?

Yeah. Did you put them everywhere? Because like, okay, for example, we had this discussion at my house. Oh, good.

Countdown, look at this. The two in front of the sink, the big kitchen sink. Yours might be different, I don't remember, because you have that homemade island. Yours might be different.

But in front of our kitchen sink, there's two fake drawers, they don't open. Okay. Right. So I was like, well, you know, you don't need to pull those or nothing.

Oh no, 'cause then it doesn't match everything else except for those two 'cause it looks like a drawer front. Right. So, but now every time you go up to the sink, you snag your pocket or you snag it fly on your pants. Right.

Yeah, we've already pulled that one off twice now. So we were gonna put one there. Don't. If you don't have to, don't do it.

No. Did you do handles or knobs? Or knobs? Handles.

Yeah, we did handles, too. Knobs are so much easier. Yeah, so, but when I went to go look at it, I'm like, there's no space for me to really get back here to do the whole thing. Yeah, I had to get a little nubby screwdriver to get, yeah, it's right up against the sink.

So I'm like, this doesn't even, it doesn't make sense, and I don't think we should do it, so we decided not to do it. I'm glad that it worked out in our favor. Yeah, it definitely, don't, don't know if you don't have to. I'm going to, I'm going to attempt to get like these little thin bricks.

Yeah. And do the entire fireplace. The fireplace. Oh, the little, like, quarter bricks.

It's, it's like, it's a whole brick. It looks like a brick. Yeah. But the thickness.

Yeah. So. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know how that's gonna work. I'm trying to think what the front of your, 'cause I hardly ever go in that room of your house where the fireplace is. We've ripped all of it off. It's all gone.

So the fireplace is up against the wall that the, was the TV over the fireplace? Okay, that's why I never see the fireplace. Mm-hmm. So what was the front of the fireplace before?

Well, at first, when we first moved in, it had like this fucking 1980s, like a Beetlejuice, you know, fucking weird shapes and stuff. Yeah. And we ripped those down, and then it had like this old brown tile that I ripped off, and then I just skimmed it, you know, because I'm just fucking, I don't know what the fuck I am, all of a sudden I'm, you know, jack of all trades over here. Oh yeah.

I should never be trusted to do these things, but here I am, so we cut, we removed all the tile, I mudded it, skimmed it, where the fuck, and then we just didn't decide, we couldn't figure out what to do, so we bought like this faux brick, and it was like this 3D, and kind of like foam, and it wasn't working, I'm like this is not gonna work the way we want it to work. You have to use actual, like, cement to put those things up, don't you? Yeah, yeah, you gotta get a thin set, the whole shebang. You gotta space it out.

Ugh. Hey man, you know what, I'm willing to do it. I'm willing to do it. I think it'll look awesome when it's done.

Well, maybe if you get lucky, it would be locked down for another two weeks, and you'll have nothing else to do. What do you mean locked down? I'm still coming in and working. On the weekends, though, yeah, but you're not having people over, you're not having your parties, you know.

That's true, but you gotta entertain the kids. Well. Play with me. Throw the football.

Video games. Read a book. Lift weights with me, Daddy. Daddy lift weights.

The little guy likes to try and lift weights, which is pretty funny, yeah. Don't you have like a little tiny set that he has? He does. He's got some little ones, but he likes to grab the big ones.

Fuck it. Fuck it. I'm going on this one, Daddy. I need my gains.

But now he's been trying Call of Duty, four years old. Oh. Call of Duty, which is interesting. He just kind of runs around and shoots walls and stuff, but whatever.

Well, can't you set him up for the AI version? Doesn't he still have that? I don't know what that is. Well, if you do, you're playing like little computer guys, so they don't shoot, they're not as accurate.

You can turn down, you used to be able to turn down their accuracy to like next to zero, so they never hit you. Yeah, you know what, I'm more, let them learn. Let's throw them in the wolves. Let's get this done.

So then I can have three machines just cranking out. You have to get, you have to get more controllers. Getting stats updates. It's amazing.

Reading a couple books with the kids. - Oh yeah, you talked about that last week. - Right now we're-- - I am Michael Jackson. " - Yeah.

- Which is a really good book. - I read most of the Reagan one here. I was very impressed. It's very historically accurate.

- Yeah, and um-- - A little graphic to tell you the truth, too. - Hey, you know, it's just facts. It is, it's life. So, now I'm watching "The Last Dance," the Michael Jordan's thing.

- Yeah. - Really good. It's really good. Oh, you're watching the video now after you've read the book?

Well, the documentary. Oh. Yeah. So, like, that's pretty cool.

Now we're on Muhammad Ali. We're doing two. We're doing Muhammad Ali. Yes.

And... They were gonna do D-Day next. Did they do D-Day? And we're doing D-Day.

My grandfather was there. But it's like, trying to explain to my son... They probably didn't mention him in the book, though. I haven't seen Palmer yet, but...

No? You never know. It might be in there. I get discouraged though so like I read them D-Day and he reads Muhammad Ali by himself and then I'll review with him I'll read Muhammad Ali and I'll say okay I'll have questions yeah but with D-Day I'm like I lose my shit sometimes cuz I'm rattling it off and then you know I'll do 15 pages or a chapter and then I'll say okay what was the who were the allied countries and then he'd say Miami and I'd be like fucking Miami.

Miami, that's a city. I haven't mentioned Miami in this entire thing. So where are you getting Miami from? Or he'll say, but then the next step, the next mistake is Japan.

Japan. Well, it's a country, Lee. I'm like, Japan's Axis, bro. Japan is Axis.

Get it together. Get some of the earlier Call of Duty versions so that's where the actually missions they fight. Yeah, so you can get the allies and the Axis and they fight them. But it's, you know, I'm trying to...

I want him to grasp these things. It's important that he pays attention. Afterwards, I beat him to death with the D-Day book. He's going to receive it one way or the other.

No, I'm just kidding. I would never strike him with a book. With a book? I would never strike him.

Ever. But yeah, so that's going well. I'm enjoying all that. A little extra time with the children and stuff?

Yeah, it's important to me that we take some of this time and they learn about major events and specific characters. Making use. Specific people who've done impressionable things in their lives and careers. So, Muhammad Ali.

Float like a butterfly. Sting like a bee. Well, that was him. All right, ready to get going here?

Mama named him Clay, I'mma call him Clay. Yeah, yeah. What are we doing? What's going on here?

You know, we have, as usual, I have tons of information. Oh, look at you. Tons of information. Pages.

This week was a little harder. Slow news week. Yeah, because everybody's just kinda like, fuck. Yeah, there's nothing going on now.

If it's not Corona, there's nothing going on. Yeah, I feel like, you know, people have momentum going into this thing. They're like, we're gonna, you know, a lot of people are like, alright, we're just gonna figure this out. We're gonna keep going, keep going.

And then eventually, you just run out of shit. And you're like, God, I don't know. I don't want to do the news. I don't want to report anything.

You know, our ratings were down a little bit last week. Yeah, because everybody's doing video and audio stuff. I have joined a podcast group on Facebook. I thought I might learn something or be able to share something I have learned or something.

Holy crap, there are so many new podcasts going on. You can't get a microphone right now. You can't get any? No, you can't.

You can't get any equipment. Man, you know what? We've got to be on the lookout in a couple months if we need to upgrade anything. Need to upgrade some equipment?

He's just going to be awful. Somebody, I can't remember the name of his show, somebody has been coming out and doing his show almost like every day and getting cigar people on it. Skip hasn't done it yet, but I think the other day, like in a row he had Rafael Nudal, Jeff Borchewitz, Saka, and somebody else, and they were like back-to-back interviews in the same day. Impressive.

I didn't watch the show. Can you keep that momentum? No, you're going to be like this, you're going to run out of people, then you just have to talk to yourself. I'll talk to you so.

You gotta circle back. Circle back. Hey. We'll talk about that later.

Alright. Alright. We'll get started. He's got something.

Is the video going? Because I'm looking at the video. Yeah, yeah, yeah, the video's going. Yeah, yeah, I started that first.

Because last time you told me to look at the video. Just look at the video. And it wasn't recording. Look at the camera, Michael.

Look at the camera. You see the red light? I got my Crook shirt on. You know what?

When I go to wear that now, I think to myself, like, okay, where did Michael wear his legs? Oh, that's so comfy. I got two of them now, so you never know. No, no, no.

They are. I wore mine last week. Very nice. So smooth.

But the Fine Ash by Nature shirt is very soft, too, and it fits well. Yeah, that's another next level shirt. Again, same scenario. If you're going to do it, just do it right.

That's right. I mean, my Wu-Tang shirt, my Fine Ash Wu-Tang shirt, I wear it so much at this point, it's all cracked. Oh, really? The paint's starting to chip off and stuff.

That's aggressive washing. I tell you, get Brittany a machine. Don't make her keep pounding the laundry on a rock down by the street. You know what, I said it before, I said it last week, I don't want to spoil it.

You've got to keep her humble. All right, Michael, Glenn Lupe is leaving the Cigar Rights of America later this year. Yeah, I heard about that. Glenn Lupe, the longtime executive director and face of Cigar Rights of America, will step down on November 4, 2020, the day after the 2020 elections.

CRA is more than a job, it's a mission, said Lupe in a press release. For almost a dozen years, we have built a national network together that can take this work into the next decade and beyond. This has been accomplished with a dedicated staff and hundreds of volunteers, for which I am thankful and express my sincere appreciation. " Yeah.

Okay. So, keep going. Go ahead. Well, I have several other quotes from him.

"The organization says that it will work with Loop over the next six months to find his replacement. The important work of CRA will continue, said Loop, who will remain a lifetime member of the organization, is a long-time cigar enthusiast. I look forward to continuing to support the CRA as a consumer. " I'm just curious.

What's the job that he just jumped into? Doesn't say. No, there's been no saying. But it says that he's now pursuing another opportunity.

No one's more passionate about the rights of people saying stuff about him. Yeah, there's been no mention of what he's doing next. Yeah, I wonder where he's going to end up. I wonder where the paycheck is.

Well, maybe that has to do with the second story then. Ah. Oh. Something that we've been following quite a long time here on this show.

Yes. 3 billion dollars. With a B. With a B.

33 billion in two stages. Little is known about the buyer's gemstone investment holdings, could be Glen Loup's company, and Allied Cigar Corporation. 3 billion out of the CRA. Alleged, alleged, alleged.

And now he is the sole owner of Altadis. Two companies that appear to be holding companies, two companies that appear to be holding companies created for this deal, but it is expected that the current management teams will remain in their capacity, Imperial hasn't explained, they always say that, but they always cut off the head. Is it like, it's like Ozark. It's like a shell company.

That's right. It's a company that owns a company that just bought a company. And it's actually ran by a drug cartel. Imperial hasn't explained why the deal needs to happen in two separate transactions, but the buyer is believed to be one group.

El Chapo. El Chapo. So, Gemstone Investment Holding Company. Have you heard of him?

Yes. Didn't he escape? I don't know. I think he's in a federal prison now.

I thought he got lost. In federal prison? Yeah. I'll tell you what, that would have been all over the news.

Wait a second. He got out of here? How did that happen? Let's see.

-based business for $200 million. A deal that will include Tabacalera. I said that right this time? Tabacalera.

Damn it! USA, which is made up of Altadis, Casa de Montecristo, JR Cigar, Flor de Copan, 50% stake in Habanos SA, 50% stake in International Cubana de Tobacco SA, 50% stake in, um, a company I cannot even close to pronounce, Tablaca, Tabaculera, thank you, the world's largest cigar factory, you think I could say the name, it's the world's largest cigar factory. I mean, for God's sakes, get it together. Vegafina and steaks in local Habanos are attributed around the world through a 50% share of Alba...

3 billion? Well, this is the half they're buying first. Okay. All right.

Both deals will not close until the third quarter. 8 multiple on EBITDA, I'm sure it stands for something, E-B-I-T-D-E-A, EBITDA, they actually call it EBITDA. We are delighted to be able to announce the sale of premium cigars in the current challenging global environment, says Dominican Brisby and Jorg Bibernick. How did they sell it for that much, 99 million.

3 billion. So we're gonna go, we're gonna shoot the moon at one point, and somebody said, Yes. No problem. Well, if they come to you with the offer, you don't go, not quite enough.

Do you want that now? How do you want that? Do you want that in ones? What would that look like in ones?

In ones. The size of this room. The company's interim chief executive in a statement. It has been a complex transaction involving joint venture partners and assets across multiple geographies, and we would like to thank everyone involved for working so hard to get the deal agreed.

So I like to think they have a huge map. 3 billion? Well, these two groups, they split it, so it's, you know, 500 million apiece. There's part of the story that...

Well, you don't know who's in the group, that's what I think, they have a huge table, and on the table they have a giant map, and they have these little things, like the World War II movies you see, you know, where they move little things around? 3, then I should be able to sell this for at least $75 million. At least! You know, minimum.

I'm giving somebody a deal at that point. You would think that would be that easy. I feel like that... Do you include the bottles?

Do the bottles come out? Yeah, bottles for $75? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Throw in the bottles.

Not my table. I want to keep my table. You can keep the table. We haven't paid for the table.

And the one metal sign over here. Yeah, that's yours. Those are mine. You can take that, too.

Okay, and my clock. Sure, you can keep the clock. Alright, good. But you know what?

I'll include all of that for a million dollars. Okay, well I'll make sure I'll get that done then. Oh, there you go. 75 for you, 74 for you.

I wish I could have been there when some, like, the first phone call after they left the conference. Like, hey, guess what? Hey, um, we just got off the phone. 3 billion?

We got it done. Billion with a B. 3 billion. I'm never wearing pants again.

" I know, that's great! Isn't that insane? Yeah, no shit, huh? They must really need to dump their cash.

Yeah, what, they really gotta get rid of something here. Yeah. Well, you know, when you gotta watch all that "Columbian Bam Bam" movie, you gotta, you know. It's so funny, it's like, all of a sudden they fall into a tax bracket where they get a tax return and they get a fucking refund.

Something stupid. Oh, yeah, they, oh, the first year they take a loan. The first 10? They take a loss.

No, run it off in the first one. How do you build the sales of that? I mean, like, I don't, I'm just so lost there. Like, it's so above me, I don't get any of it.

" I mean, how does that work in your head? Carry the one. Carry the one. Oh, I'm going to take my shoe off.

I need it after five. You know what the sad part is? I bet you that that was negotiated. 5.

7 billion and they talked him down. You know what? Fuck it. 2 billion dollars.

I want 2 billion for this thing. And then somebody's like, I'm not fucking paying. That's ridiculous. That is insane.

That's crazy. 3. 8. 8.

Still too high. I'm at a billion. 5. Well, you know what?

3. I feel like the first counter, okay, so they say two billion, right? And then the guy says, no, no, no, pfft, one. I'm paying one billion, that's it.

The guy's like, you know what, I'll have to get back to you. He goes back on the point and he's like, I already got him on the hook for a billion fucking dollars. 3. Maybe you can juice it for a little more.

I want a boat. I really want an island. Fuck, man. I want the boat from the movie where they had the big party.

So as of this day today, Cigar House is for $75 million, that's my asking. There you go, is the phone ringing yet? You just announced the phone ringing? Not yet, not yet, I'm, what's the name of that holding company?

Called Glenn Lupe. Those stories aren't linked, Mike, those stories are not linked. Okay. All right.

I mean, 20 minutes already. If they're linked, then Glenn Lupe needs to come out and say that he's fucking Skeletor or something. It's like, he's some evil, you know, he's like, haha, it is me! He, man, I shall crush you!

And now you all know, Red Skull! Um, what the hell was the name? Yeah, what was the name of, uh, uh, uh, the octopus sign? Uh, shit!

Dr. Octopus? No, no, no. Oh!

Hydra! Hydra! Hail Hydra! Hail Hydra!

Hail Hydra! That's right, it was me all along. Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor.

Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor.

Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor.

Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor.

Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor.

Glendloop is a Skeletor. Glendloop is a Skeletor. They're on, uh, uh, uh, listen to your podcast, and, um, I have some concerns, apparently... Yes, hello, we listen to your podcast, and we have a few concerns with some of the information that you're talking about, please?

Yeah, you seem to be scarily accurate on some of your things. We would like to know how you found out? Oh no, we'd like to just, uh, buy your silence, and your company. Hail Hydra.

Hail Hydra. You should start just saying it every time you hang up at the phone with somebody. Yeah, that's right, Hail Hydra. I'm sorry, what?

Oh, nothing. Not nothing. Just show that slide out and they'll think you're one of them. Exactly.

There you go. All right, Michael. That's all the industry news we had this week. Hell Hydra.

Now we just have pointless coronavirus information. Oh, this is always exciting. And a story I've been looking forward to for all week. Oh, very excited.

All right. I feel like, and I don't want to jinx this, but I feel like our governor, our great governor, Ron DeSantis, is going to come out and say Friday. Hell Hydra? " I feel like he's going to come out and say that we're going to start loosening some of this shit up, and I really hope— You think he's going to wait until Friday?

Yeah, because he—that was the date that he set, May 1— Well, shouldn't he—maybe Thursday? Because May 1 would be the start date, so he couldn't—because if he says—gets on the air and goes, "Yeah, I think today's the day, we're just going to—" I think that he comes out either Thursday, maybe he comes out Thursday or Friday, I mean the Orges in the Street sounds great, but I think that he'll say, hey, you know, Monday, May, what is that, the 4th? May the 4th be with you? One, two, three, four, yeah.

Oh, may the 4th be with you. Yeah. That's a big one for Disney. Oh, they're taking a major hit for May the 4th, because they're closed.

Nope, you can open them back up. Only them. Just Hollywood Studios. Just Hollywood Studios.

Just the Star Wars part. May the 4th be with you. You guys all go in. Nobody wear masks.

Disney's probably part of Hydra. Everybody, hail Hydra. You need to stop with that. Hashtag hail Hydra.

We've moved on from the Hydra. What was I going to say? So I think. I don't know.

We're going to take a commercial after one story. I think that I'm hoping to God that come Monday, you know. Things have loosened up a little bit. You know, they're going to open up restaurants, space people out, maybe put people in masks for working.

But like, they gotta do something. Right. Everything's looking good here. Allegedly.

Allegedly. I mean, who the fuck knows. Yeah, it depends on how they're skewing the numbers that we... But you're starting to see, you know, how many people are unemployed and, you know, how many lives are being destroyed on top of people that are dying.

So, you know, there's no right answer at the end of the day. There's gotta be a give and a take, and we gotta, I feel like we need to start opening up. So I really hope that that's the case, because I would love to open the lounge again and have people come in and, you know, hey, maybe... It's going to be hard to do the six foot thing.

You just space them out. I understand that, but I mean, is it past somebody? Can you walk past them within six feet? I mean...

As long as you don't lick their face. Oh, okay. Gotcha. And then, okay, because what they're saying in a restaurant is, like, your server will wear a mask and, you know, maybe gloves, but you obviously can't while you're eating, You're not eating, so the patrons won't be able to.

Oh, I'm not wearing a mask. I'm going to a restaurant with no mask. No, well, you can't. You're going to be eating.

Hey, you can't eat. What, are you just going to stick it in the side? I mean, you end up with steak sauce all over the side of your face in a mask. I mean, I watched somebody from Florida come out, one of the doctors, and says, like, you people don't even know what you're doing with these masks, so I don't know why you're wearing them.

It's pretty much what he said. Well, yeah. Was it the chiropractor? Everybody's supposed to chiropractic.

I don't think it was the chiropractor. That he was part of like Orlando Health. A real doctor. Yeah.

Ah, gotcha. But how does that work here? So whoever's working that day will have to have a mask on because they're waiting on the customers? Nah, I don't know.

Could be. Hey, we got the Pastaña masks. Life is good, man. That's right.

All right. That's right. All right, we're gonna have to take a break. Hey, we gotta take a break.

We're gonna take a break already. All right, let's take a break. All right, we'll be right back. All right, hail Hydra.

Hey, it's Mike Tu. Want to be part of the show? com/thecigarhustlerspodcast. We have tiers starting at just $5 a month.

For $10 a month, you get a special show swag, and then you're eligible for the weekly secret show. Secret shows cover in-depth cigar reviews, behind-the-scenes information, and sometimes, we just talk shit about people. Choose which tier works best with your budget and become an official show hustler. Thanks for the support.

Okay, and we're back. Yay. We're back. We have a live read, Michael.

We have a new sponsor. We have a new sponsor. Yes. We have this lovely, let's find the button.

Oh, oh, look at this thing. Wow, we're looking at it. It's quite nice. I just want, okay, so.

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It's the size of a cell phone. It works in fog, smoke, or the darkest night, Michael. That's nice. It's a 500 meter throw, it comes with a charger and a clip for your coat or shirt pocket.

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Wow. So, I want to take that thing, and I want to go print out a Batman logo. Oh, it'd probably be perfect for that. Yeah, and hopefully he'll show up.

I'm just hoping that maybe he'll solve the coronavirus. They're working on a second product, it's a case for this, so it hooks on your cell phone. Ooh, like a dome within the dome. A dome within the dome.

Oh, on the cell phone. On the cell phone, yes. Oh, it's like, hey! Holy crap.

All right, okay, turn it off. You're driving nuts. All right, again, this is Superstrike Rechargeable Flashlight. Gonna have a stroke or migraine.

I think it's bright. 95. com, or you can call 352-615-0765. Threatting my kids with that.

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Let's see, Dad. Well, just set the chair so everybody can look at it. There you go, Superstrike away. Let me see that thing.

You want to see? It's beautiful. Oh. Let's put it in your eyes.

I didn't hit you in the face with it. Push the button. Oh. If you push it twice, it stays on.

One, two. One, two. Well, not so fast. You got to push it in.

I got it. Okay. That's nice. Isn't that nice?

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Superstrike. Newest sponsor for Cigar Hoster Podcast. Alright, now back to the news. Michael, do you think the coronavirus can be spread through a fart?

Yes. The smell may be hell, but the mist could leave you pissed. Two Australian doctors have weighed in about the spread of coronavirus down under. Whatever can be spread through farts, that is.

During Friday's episode of the Australian Broadcasting Corporation, the Coronacast, Podcast. Producers and host Dr. Norman Swan made a controversial suggestion when it comes to particles of feces set adrift within a fart and spread of the COVID-19. You know, I got a couple things to say now.

So first of all, we discussed the genitals last week and now we're moving on to... Now it can be spread in a fart. So it's kind of amazing, a little remarkable to me that the Chinese have developed such a biological weapon that you can... That is attacking male testicles.

Male testicles. And now, apparently, according to the Australians, no bare-bottom farting. No bare-bottom farting, yes. So no one is safe in an airplane.

Swan advised about posterior pandemic panic in a measured mild amusing tone. Oh, my God. Luckily, we wear a mask, which covers our farts all the time. Your pants.

Ah, a fart mask. Referring to the protective aspects of pants, shorts, dresses, underwear, and other garments. Should we get, like, an NE5 pair of briefs? Yes, I think that what we should do in terms of social distancing and being safe is that you don't fart close to other people.

Oh, I can't guarantee that. And that you don't fart with your bottom bear. I don't know what that means. Don't drop your pants and then fart.

Oh, what? Let's say you're at home. Is there another way to fart? I mean, I don't want it to get in my boxers.

I need it to air out completely. No, no, that is the mask you are wearing on your bottom. I'm no mask. It actually would be layered unless you're going commando.

Like I said, if I'm going to a restaurant, I'm not wearing a mask, or pants. Or pants. Hmm. It's an aerosol-generated procedure.

A recent study, in fact, suggested post-flush toilet plume could even cause for concern when it comes to spreading the coronavirus via aerosol feces, aerosolized feces. Oh, my God. So, if you have it and you poop, you must shut the lid before you poop. We have flying shit.

Plus, scientists have confirmed that fecal-oral transmission itself is an issue due to the presence of the virus in poop. So, who's eating poop? I don't know. Australians?

Evidently. Which is why health officials in Oregon and New York are even cautioning against oral contact with feces during sex. So now we've got doctors that are taking the time discovering the poop and the farts. Well, okay.

The Indian doctor ladies. The genitalia. The ball discovery. And the ball discovery.

So, everybody's just trying to find their piece of the corona pie, Michael. So, ah, you know, you've got to find out what could it do next. It's being spread via fart! Where does that leave us?

Tad, co-founder of the medical education site, don't forget the bubbles suggest not throwing a caution to the, um, wind. Ha ha ha. He insisted, uh, he proposes keeping your pants on and considering them part of your personal protective equipment, just in case. And eating less beans.

Well, okay, but now we're going to have the bean industry after this. Yeah, they're coming. They're coming. It's going to be right there with the gas.

All right. Well, today's the day, Michael. Today is the day. Georgia is opening gyms.

Nail salons, bowling alleys, and restaurants and movie theaters next Monday. Georgia will allow businesses to begin reopening in phases. They started last Friday and into next Monday today. Governor Brian Kemp announced Monday afternoon at a news conference.

Some elective surgeries could resume immediately, he said. Georgia. Gyms, hair salons, barbershops, fitness centers, and massage therapy centers will be allowed to reopen Friday, so you have to get a massage with people wearing rubber gloves, that just seems painful. Seems odd.

It seems very discomforting. Remove those gloves. And my pants. Next Monday, restaurants, private social clubs, and movie theaters.

This is a podcast for the ages. Kemp was light on specifics on his remarks, saying businesses should adhere to the minimum basic operations. How do you do six foot distancing with your masseuse? They have a stick, they poke you with a stick.

There's no way that you're going to work out in the gym being six feet away from everybody. Oh, here we go. Minimum basic operations includes, but it's not limited to: Screening workers for fever and respiratory illnesses. Enhancing workplace sanitation.

Yeah, if you don't feel well, don't come in. Don't come to work. But that doesn't mean... Wearing gloves and masks.

I mean, we could be carrying this shit right now. We could be asymptomatic. It's possible. Yeah, it's possible.

So I probably shouldn't have drank out of your water bottle earlier, then. Separating workplaces by at least… Well, I farted in yours, so… Oh, there you go. So don't worry. Teleworking wherever possible and implementing staggered shifts.

Oh, we should do staggered shifts here. Ooh. Can we do staggered shifts here? I feel like I'm doing that now.

Oh, you are. The Republican governor said, "Bars, nightclubs, amusement parks, and other businesses will remain closed," Kemp added, pending further advice from public health experts. That's where we draw the line. They have been talking about that on the news here about what Disney is proposing that they're going to do, they're going to take your temperature when you go in, so now it's check your bag, metal detectors, and now they're going to take your temperature.

Well, they've already built like these, they look like metal detectors, that tell your heart rate. Well, in Hong Kong for years, because they've always do that since SARS, they have these things mounted on the ceiling as you get off the plane, and they, you know, it's like a heat camera, so, and then there's a guy watching the screen, looks at somebody glowing red. Oh, he's warm. Yeah, he's warm.

Pull him over. I've never seen him stop anybody, though. It's China, bro. Well, when it first came out, they were coming on the plane with the guns.

Beep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep. " No. Yee-hee. Can't get me.

Achoo. Achoo. You're already sneezing here once today. Sir, come with us.

Kim said that the state's rate of new infections have flattened, and he cited President Donald Trump's desire to get the country back to work during his remarks. The White House last week announced guidelines that recommend a phase reopening, which we only get phase one and two because you poop with the star, I didn't get to phase three. Oh, good. Reopening the state economies at the discretion of the governors based on the latest case numbers and testing capacities.

There you go. Kemp said the state's rate, uh, we don't really care about that. Let's just do this already. Come on.

All right, uh, these are out of order. The mayor of Las Vegas wants to open casinos and let the number infected determine which of them have to close. Love it. Apparently she does not even have control of the strip, but she has announced, open them, and if a lot of people get sick, we'll close you, but you'll be fine.

Is it still Mahabra in Vegas? You gotta figure it is. Yeah, Las Vegas mayor. She's just a puppet.

She's got no say in any of it. Carolyn Goodman thinks that businesses in the city that want to reopen should be able to. Hey, Carolyn, let me talk to you for a second. We need to open this back up here.

I'm not making any money. Right now, nothing's going on and that way, those businesses that see outbreaks can just be closed again at a later date, maybe. You know, we got our heroin money and it's backed up. The mayor who doesn't have authority over the Vegas Strip shared her idea with MSNBC's Katie Turr in a phone interview on Tuesday.

" Oh, so it looks like you're not feeling too good, huh? Why don't you go down to the Venetian, huh? Get out of here. Get out of here.

Go down there. They're all sick there. You'll be fine. Yeah, that's where the sick ones go.

All right, in Volusia County. Ooh, that's us. That's us. That's right here.

That's right. That's here. I've discussed this story with quite a few people and everybody already seemed to know about it, so you might know also, Michael. I probably don't.

The refreshment stand is still open and classic movies are playing at epic theaters of Volusia County. Not a sponsor, but we're going to talk about them anyway. The theater started showing drive-in movies on March 19th as a way to give families a night out while still maintaining social distancing guidelines. It's like a five-minute drive from here.

Do you know where it is? No. It's over by Deltona High School. It's a very nice theater.

I've never been inside. But they have started showing movies on the outside of the building. That's awesome. It is, isn't it?

Smart. And then they started first just showing it on the brick, and then now they painted the brick white. Oh, upgraded. Enjoy a night out from the safety of your vehicle, the theater's website reads.

This also has a location in Claremont showing drive-in movies. Because you know, it's just like in that movie Outbreak where the guy was laughing, ha ha ha, the little particle went into his mouth and then everybody died. Oh yeah, that's right, yeah. So that's what they're trying to avoid.

According to the Daytona News Journal, the theater initially used a screen taken out of storage but have now painted large screen directly onto the building. Good for them. Well, the movies aren't first run. They range from well-known horror films to '80s classics like Stand By Me.

Movies are run nightly, for example. Okay, here are the movies that you had the choices for. You lost me. You lost me.

I could just watch that shit at home. I mean, just give me a new movie. It's a chance for you to get out. Well, apparently there's probably some issue with showing new movies.

Well, plus there's no new movies coming out right now. They've backed them all up. But this past Saturday, they showed The Karate Kid. I guess.

Yeah, that one ends. And then The Great Outdoors, the candy movie. Daniel was, he was the aggressor. Oh, I saw the YouTube video.

On Sunday they showed, oh, they showed the Breakfast Club and then Pretty in Pink. You know, I never liked Breakfast Club. I like Breakfast Club, not a big fan of Pretty in Pink. I never watched that one.

Oh, you should watch it. For me, Breakfast Club was just, it just was agitating. I'm like, what, they're just in the room, I just don't get it. m.

and it's $20 a car. Tickets can be purchased on one. And then they all smoke weed and like all of a sudden, what's his name? What's his name?

He's got, like, all his energy. He's a wrestler. What the fuck is his name? Emilio Estevez.

Yeah, yeah, that's him. He's dancing up and down. The other guy's hiding in the ceilings. This is stupid.

Oh, we should have led with this story. And then one guy wrote the thing at the end. Right, wrote the one paper. Yeah, nothing like fucking, hey, you do the work.

Fuck everybody. The nerd. Oh, okay, thanks. The nerd had to write this story.

I would be like, hey, I'm not doing it. Find somebody else to do it. You'd have been the aggressive jock, Mike. You do it, Emilio.

No, Emilio was the jock. I know. It was Michael something or other. I'd have been the nerd that did all the work.

I was going to say you're the red-head chick, but okay. I am Molly Ringwald in your world. Thank you very much. All right, Michael.

Don't you forget about me, Mike. Kim Jong-un has died. No, he hasn't. No, it's been verified now.

Following a failed cardiovascular surgery, leaving him in a vegetative state, Stop. Your content can report. TMZ reported it first, so it must be real. He was 36.

They confirmed Michael Jackson. Kim was told, you said five days to live exactly five days to go according to experts close to the situation. So now our one fan in North Korea is gone. He's gone.

Son of a. I'm going to start all over in North Korea. I hope it wasn't because he went and got the Pornhub premium. Yeah.

Because then they had to kill him. I'm serious. That's just the way it works. You're not allowed to do that.

But it's my country. No, sorry. We got a fine line on the porn here, sir, fine line. Dennis Robben must be pretty distraught.

Well, he's probably going to the funeral. I would believe it. The claims cannot be verified independently. The timing certainly makes one curious.

Oh, he probably died of COVID, of Corona. No way. Certainly makes one curious as to now. China has sent in a medical team.

Oh, God. That's where they're at? The Chinese medical team. Because they've been a reliable source through all of this.

According to international media, the Supreme Leader died Saturday. It's Saturday. What's more, electricity was cut in the entire country. Shut it down.

Alright, he's dead. Turn everything off. That's it. It's off.

Can the people eat now? Do they get food? No. Well, they can't cook it.

All the power's off. According to the New York Post. Are they allowed to grow food again? No.

The news of the death of Kim Jong, North Korean broke the whole country, except for places electricity was... Well, don't they act like he's a god and he doesn't poop and stuff? He said the country fell into darkness. Oh, they did it on purpose.

Yeah. He fell into darkness. Of course they did. He's dead.

Oh, he died? We need everybody to be sad. Hold on, hold on. Fuck it.

Okay, the whole country's in darkness. Here's the one switch. Guess what? One switch.

He's dead, guys. He was the light for you. He was the light that kept our country. Look at the camera.

I know you're all starving. Because it's not running. No, it's running. I can't deal with you.

Alright, Publix is buying excess milk and products from the farmers and donating it to food banks. Oh, well that's lovely. That's lovely. Farmers around the country have been forced to dump milk.

What? Well, I mean, you're paying $8 for a fucking two-gallon jug. Where the hell are you buying? I'm just kidding.

Milk. I buy Costco, man. I pay $2. Forced to dump milk and waste fresh produce as schools, restaurants, and other institutions remain closed due to the coronavirus pandemic.

In response, supermarket chain Publix launched a new initiative Wednesday to help struggling farmers and get the food to America who need it most. Publix. The company's press release said it will purchase fresh produce and milk from farmers impacted by the coronavirus and donate the goods directly to Feeding America Food Bank Center and its operating area. During the first week, the initiative loaned some 150,000 pounds of produce and 43,500 gallons of milk is expected to be donated to the company's set.

That's nice. Good for you. Good for Publix. I like that.

That's a good thing. Good. I'm glad you like that. Because this is why I brought this up.

Because now, Kim Jong-un has owned, he owns Publix. And Glenloop. And Glenloop. Glenloop, too.

Hail Hydra. See, the company will only purchase food from Florida Produced Farmers and Southeastern Dairy Farmers throughout the initiative, is kicking off Wednesday, and is expected to run for several weeks. But this was announced during a press release, Michael. So going back to your Alec Bradley rant of last week, this is not good because they're having to tell people they did it.

You're right. You're right. Nope, but you just said, oh, that's Publix, I like them, that's nice. I mean, that is nice.

So why is it not nice for Alec Bradley, but it's nice for Publix? Well, hey, I started by saying… And I knew I would catch you in this. I started by saying the gallons of milk were $8 anyways. They're not, a gallon was $8.

If you shop at Publix… In Florida, you just about have to. If you shop at Publix, you're paying a premium. Are you not? No, their prices aren't any higher than, say, Winn-Dixie.

I totally disagree. I don't think so. So you can get all those things for less at Walmart. Have you been to Walmart though?

I have. Publix is nice and clean, everybody's nice and the weight's on you, and there's not the, you never see a post on Facebook going people of Publix. Okay, so they did a nice thing and then they had to fucking toot their horn. So now I'm upset about it.

There you go. It's just like, just do the right thing. They could have just did it. They didn't have to do a press release.

Well, you don't know what else they're doing. I can just tell you that that's the big one and they didn't have to do a press release. Oh, you were fine until I brought it to your attention. The rent stays like a before.

I'm not okay with that. Just do the right thing. You don't have to promote the fact that you're doing the right thing. I don't give a shit what it is.

There you go. All right. Just ranting and raving over there. All right, an Irish midget accused of posting...

Yeah, I went and I ordered Chinese food the other, last week. On the phone or did you go online? How did you go online? " Yeah, we do pick up.

We have one here by the house. So I came to pick it up. It was fucking Thunderdome. Was a lot of people there?

There was probably eight clusters of people. Yes. And it still took over an hour to get my food. You always have a bad Chinese restaurant.

I think they have the best sushi, even though they're Chinese. Sushi's Japanese. Yeah, but it's all in the one. I don't know.

It's not the same thing. I'm telling you, the sushi there is amazing. " So I'm sitting there. It's over an hour.

" I start calling inside. They come out and they drop the food off of the table and they run away. So I call inside. I'm like, "Hey, you told me to be here.

" I'm gonna do this for you. Go ahead. Go. Make your phone go.

It's so racist, Mike. It's okay. It's fun. " Oh yeah, we are packing it right now, sir.

And then they hang up on me. Goodbye. So that happened a couple times. Oh, we told you, no call again.

We pack your food now. So they eventually, the food comes out. So we have your food now. Mr.

We cannot say your name. So I go and I'm like, you know what? Yes, here's your food. Let me just check this.

No, no, you don't look until you get home. No look. So I opened it up. So you must leave now.

You have food. You must go out to car. So I open it up. Okay.

All right, we get it. Stop. Let's just go on. So I open it up, check it in my car.

I'm like, fuck. Oh, he looked in the bag. Did you double check the order? It was missing like a third of the stuff.

A third of the stuff? Of the stuff, of my food. What all did you order? It wasn't a lot.

I always get, I always get, I call it a school of salmon. Salmon sashimi. So that, you can't. We don't have that much salmon.

He's a big boy. He's a lot of food. So they missed that. They messed that up.

They gave me the assorted sashimi, which pissed me off. Just mixing some of the trout. He don't know. And there was some kind of tuna that my wife orders that she didn't get.

Do you want to open a can of tuna? So when I came back in-- So when I came back in-- Oh no, big man, come back in, he looks mad! " Send Pablo to the counter. Oh, sorry, we'll be right, we'll get it right.

Oh, sorry, sir, we'll get it right for you this time. I waited another 20 minutes. You waiting more than 20 minutes. Use it right there.

Okay, Mike, thanks. Appreciate it. Can I just talk now? For fuck's sake.

We're fun! Oh my God. So yeah, I went back and I was like, "What the hell? " You ate it.

We saw you. You ate food. We'll be back. We'll be right back.

You wait there 20 minutes. It's always 20 minutes at a Chinese restaurant. Everything's 20 minutes. All right, 20 minutes.

" Okay, you come in 20 minutes and be ready. Well, they told me 45 minutes, so I got there 45 minutes later and then I waited an hour on top of that. " We told you! Two hours!

We told you! Two hours! You wait! Oh shit.

Alright, an Irish misget accused of posing as a leprechaun to extort sex from twenty-six women in exchange for a pot of gold. It worked twenty-six times? Twenty-six. Holy shit!

A three-foot, four-inch tall Irishman was arrested this morning for allegedly taking advantage of women by posing as a leprechaun and extorting sexual favors in exchange for a fictional pot of gold. 29-year-old, hidden at the end of the rainbow. 29-year-old Conor O'Brien was arrested this morning at the Dublin residence by the Irish National Police. According to the police spokesman Seamus Murphy, Mr.

O'Brien used a rather unusual story to cheat both tourist and native local sexual favors from them. Oh, tourists too! Yes. The victims all said they're dressed up in leprechauns and said he had a huge pot filled with gold coins hidden at the end of the rainbow that he was willing to offer for six.

Surprisingly, the rather far-fetched scam fooled dozens of gullible women. 26 victims have already filed complaints with the police. Only 26 have filed. Yes, but investigators believe the real number of victims could be more over 200 or maybe even 300 women.

That guy is amazing. Many of these women were extremely naive and vulnerable. Some even cried when we told them the leprechauns don't really exist. While searching through his house, the police found six different leprechaun costumes, as well as a few ancient gold coins he used to prove the existence of his pot of gold.

Mr. Conner faces a total of 64 criminal charges, including 26 accusations of embezzlement, 18 charges of sexual abuse, and 8 charges of fraud. According to the investigation, the number of accusations could easily double or triple over the next few days. It was a good run, though.

It was a good run. Good job, Connor. If found guilty on all charges, he already faces a sentence of life in prison and a fine of 75,000 whatever money they have there. Is that the story you've been waiting on?

I want to do the Irish accent, yes. Oh, so you're excited about that. How rarely do I have a choice to do the Irish accent. And you just threw in a Chinese one, too.

Oh, I know. That was more fun. I love when I get to do the Chinese. Yeah, because you're a Chinese expert.

Holy shit, this guy. Twenty-six reported. Yeah, exactly. Could be 300.

I would say that there's at least five for every one that reported it. Think of what the span of time. You had six costumes. I got a dude.

Like, that worked. I mean, holy shit. Okay, you do it once, and you're like, okay, this worked. This can't possibly work again.

I need more outfits because I'm going to double it up on somebody's other. He gets to a point where he's just reckless about it. You know what I mean? Right.

He walks into a bar drunk with the costume on going, yeah. Yeah, um, uh, if you have sex with me, we get to do the pot of gold at the end? Yeah, yeah, that's how it works. Oh yeah?

Like, really? That's how it works? Okay. I mean like...

Change, you know, it's the way it works. I like... You don't like the outfit? I'll put on another one.

I get six of them back home. " So... Talk it to her, friend. So this guy tells me...

Sally, you're not gonna believe this? I just fucked a leprechaun? This guy tells me that he's a leprechaun, and that if I have sex with him, he's gonna give me a pot of gold. How do I let, how do I say no?

How do I pass on this? Yeah, I was like, I have to live this experience. Yeah, of course it wasn't a leprechaun, you know, but hey, I mean, that was a hell of a pitch. Jeez.

All right, we're at 50 minutes. Let's wrap this up and get out of here. We have a listener of the week. Listener of the week.

Listener of the week this week is Douglas Pendleton on Instagram. S. was the best one to get after we gave all our free ones last week, there evidently is some show on there, season one there was a lot of unnecessary sex that will get your wife kind of going, and not really appropriate to the story, but there's a lot of sex. Oh, very nice.

Outlander, that was the name of the show, Outlander. Yeah, well, Power's the same way. I mean, the first three seasons of Power. Oh, I'm kidding.

Oh, yeah. Everybody's dead now, right? Everybody's dead on that show? No, no, it's over.

Okay, I didn't see the last two seasons. They did like a bunch of spin-offs. Oh, didn't they? Yeah, they're setting it up so that...

But the black guy died, the main black guy. Yeah. The girl died. Which girl?

Yep. The white girl, or Mexican girl, Hispanic, whatever the hell she was. Puerto Rican, dude. Puerto Rican, okay, whatever.

Fuck. So who's left? The white guy? The Mexican girl.

Jesus. The white guy's left? Tommy Egan. Tommy.

Yeah. So is he the spinoff show? Tommy Egan. Because he wasn't even the star of the show.

He's going to Cali. I mean, he could have been. Ghost is obviously dead. Ghost is dead.

That's the black guy. Jamie. What was his name? Jamie.

His name was Jamie. Jamie. God. What about his wife?

Is she dead, too? She's in jail. Oh. There you go.

She went to jail. His son is going to college. Oh, that's right. His son was dead.

And that's another spin-off. Okay, 50 Cent die again? No, 50 Cent's still dead. Okay.

That would be like the third time he died then. And then, no, he really died that last time we really died. You thought he died the second time too. And then there's a politician that's doing a spin-off too, which doesn't look at all...

The politician who was using Jamie? Yeah. Oh, I didn't even like that guy. Yeah, I know.

There's like, it's not even... That's not gonna work. Yeah. It's a great politician show.

Hmm. Haven't seen that before. Yeah, it's true. I don't...

I mean, I would be interested to see the Tommy Egan one. Tommy, yeah, that would be interesting to watch. He's just such a ruthless character, you know? Yeah.

So that'd be cool. He has so many problems. He was just in Ozark. Oh, was he?

Oh, yeah. Oh. He was. Oh.

Season three. All right, better wrap this up, Greg, 'cause you're on somebody on there. Oh, he's getting angry. Maybe it's his stepson.

Maybe he showed up here at the shop. Let's call him the son. All right, guys, this has been episode 119. Hey.

By the time this comes out, we don't know if you have to wash your hands anymore. So, you know. You may not have to do anything anymore. You may not have to do anything anymore.

So start coughing and sneezing and licking everybody. Back to normal. Back to normal. All right, guys, thank you very much.

We gotta go. Bye. A Cigar Hustlers podcast, its owners and its sponsors take no responsibility for the opinions or statements made by the talk show host or their guest. Statements or show topics are not necessarily the beliefs of Mike & Mike Productions or the podcast providers, and opinions between talk show hosts may differ.

It is not our intention to libel, incite, or hurt anyone's feelings. We invite you to write the show's host, Mike Szczefankewicz, with any feedback or suggestions that you have for their shows. These broadcasts are presented and made public as entertainment in the hope that they will be entertaining to the audience. This has been a Cigar Hustlers podcast, a Mike and Mike production.

m. for all new episodes. Hi, I'm doing, I'm Hoostoe-Raw. Yeah, we just don't have to do a single podcast ever again.

Perfect. I'm good, Mike and Mike. How are you guys doing? The Hojo Deeb.

Hojo! It's the Hojo! Demandre... You didn't even let him fuck it up all the way.

I could get past Hojo! I don't even have to try to hit the record. He's not even going to try. We're going to cover a lot of ground here, Mike.

All right. Try to keep up. That's a sign of a good podcast. You'd be like four cigars when I walked in a door.

All right, end this. Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike Squared.

Show Notes

More Doctors Corona reports from different countries.....Mikey goes out for Chinese....and Hail Hydra!!

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