Premium Cigar Talk & Wild Headlines | CHPOD 646

Transcript

David Pérez: Ladies and gentlemen, amateurs and aficionados, sit down and get ready in 3, 2, 1. He sounds a little low. You buzz when you talk. Yeah, I know.

Do I buzz? I buzz when I talk, too. There's feedback. Some buzzing.

Great. Not that bad. He sounds great. He's got a $500 mic he's talking into.

Because these are... well, I'm sorry, these are only $750. Right. That's what I mean.

But they're wireless. Wireless is never as good as cord. You want to go back to cord? We still have the stuff.

No, we just spent $1,400 on this stuff, apparently. Welcome to Cigar Hustler Podcast, premium cigars, unfiltered opinions and conversations that can go anywhere. Anywhere. B.

Palmer, and joining me today is my co-host, Mike the King, Szczepankewicz. Can I say hello to the peoples? Hi. I'm mad right now.

And over in the booth in engineering with the best sounding microphone of anybody today, Ziggy the beer man. Hello, folks. See, he just sounds perfect. He sounds kind of low.

Well, we're going with it. I feel like I have an echo. You have an echo, I have feedback, and he's too low. This is, I'm so glad we moved.

We finally had it all straightened out, and it's like, you know what? Let's relocate. You know what? Let's unhook everything and move it and then put it back together.

Yeah. What would life be like without challenges? It's like a fortune cookie. From cigars, sports and business to pop culture and the wildest headlines, I'm afraid what this is going to sound like on the other thing, if it's worth discussing, we're talking about it, no safe spaces, just real perspectives, big laughs, and the chance for everything to go off the rails at any moment.

Like right now. Like right now. Light one up, settle in, and welcome to a Cigar Hustlers podcast. Dun, dun, dun.

Thank you very much. On today's show, American-Made Super Dogs, nine Universal closures in 2027. Universal? Yes.

Universal just for you. Okay. Universal, Le Park. Really?

Yes. $7,000, $760,000 swallowed. I like how you're a little more head-on than I am. Then in cigars, we have something to clear our nuts.

A little pink and black accent, and we find out it's all part of the Matrix. And then we have an update from the Dell Taco guys. It just, like it changed. What changed?

Like the feed. Well you hit the button and it's a two shot. No, like the feed. Oh.

Like it's gone. It's still there. But it feels like glass now. It does sound like glass.

I moved that camera. Well stop moving the camera. Don't do that. Don't do that?

Or move it again. It hurts when I do this? Yeah, so don't do that. Update to the Dell Tobacco Boys and finally a What's the Score Monday.

One, two, three, four, five, six. What are you doing? You think it's too many? They put enough plugs in.

I'm just debating if we- Two plugs are loose. The last two? But that's all camera stuff. Yeah, but it still links into there.

Yeah? Yeah. I'm willing to, I'm wondering if we, if we get like a surge protector that it all goes into one? One giant, humongous surge protector.

One megalodon. Six? You got six there, what do you got there? Six?

One, two, three, four, five, six. You need a 12 or with a USB? A 12 with a USB. Yeah.

Okay, yeah, well that would eliminate the brick for the light. This light has a brick. What brick? It's got the little brick at the end.

Well... So if it had a USB, it wouldn't need a brick. Well, that one has a USB. Yeah, well, you switched it because that was, that didn't matter.

I like that I make you angry. First, Michael, welcome back and what's going on over in the lounge? Let's get this thing moving, this train back on the way. Well, first and foremost, I feel like, let me sit up a little bit here.

It's gonna cut the top of your head. How's that? We're in smouch mode. First and foremost, like and subscribe wherever you're viewing and listening to the show.

A little aggressive. com for all your chpod swag. com, us, Cigar Hustlers Podcast. We got a couple things going on, I had a couple of big updates, updates on the site, as well as the CH Pod site.

Yeah. The back end now for the site, I built a thing where, for like the membership program, it now, you can click the product, and then it'll give you a brief description that you can print out. Oh, if you're buying the swag. No, no, no, no, no, I'm talking about the other site, for the membership.

Membership. Yeah. I can't say it. Oh.

Alright. I hate when you do that. Well, you know, if you would brief me before the show what we're going to talk about, I would get these hints and these little clues. Just figure out what we can and cannot discuss.

This isn't hard. Alright, alright. If I'm being vague, it's obvious. Well, if you're being vague and I don't know it, they're not going to know it either.

I guarantee you, they know it. Alright. They know it. Okay.

So, the membership system now, I can click on the products and build it in. And build it in so you can see the value that you're getting and as well as it describes exactly blend profiles, blend profiles, and all this other stuff, not the level, and then it's also gonna put them in strength order, and then what I did was I built a reviews thing so you can go back, any product that you purchase, you can go back and review its flavor profile, and if you liked it, if you didn't like it, what was good about it, what wasn't, and when you do that, if you're a member, you're gonna get additional points. So that's cool. I also built a shipping inventory thing, which is not sexy, but awesome.

Do I have yours? No. Mine's got my name on it. I'm closer to everything being built in on the back end of the CHPod site.

For the Patreon, obviously, you use the no-cursey word thing. Yeah, it worked well. It was pretty funny. Yeah.

Yeah, Siggy said, not really a bad word, but I guess a bit. So, did you have to give it a list of bad words? No, no. It just transcribes it, and it knows what's bad.

That's what it meant. How did it know what's profanity and what's not? Yeah, it just knows. It just knows.

So, it probably built that itself. Yeah, you could hit the button and I could hear what he said, and then it gives you the option to, would you like to mute this? Right. Well, I think I would, yes.

Click. Exactly. Right. Nice, right?

The We Have No Idea mask has moved to $125. Right now, Lance refuses to go away. Uh-oh. And is there an additional comment on that?

Let me see. Shaking a fist. Oh, it says, Lance says, "Oh yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Come on, CW.

" "Okay. Some comments from the CH Pod Lounge. Let's see here. " It's CHPOD, and then the numbers after that, that's the way the system does it.

That's correct, it was not there. Oh, it must have just been one of the three, because I remember doing it. It was in both, it wasn't in A or B. Well, there's A, B, C, there's three options.

Oh, all I saw was A and B. Oh, yeah, there's three. So, some comments from the show. I heart BDP, no king, just a great BDP and his minions.

Because he means yesterday's show. Oh, my minion talent. Yeah, comments from yesterday's show. Thanks.

Welcome to the podcast. Thank you. I like the fact that you guys were talking about how neither one of you are swingers, but I got news for you. Like, listen, man, if it was like the two of you, like, oh, yeah, no, we don't.

Oh, we just had a strange couple friends. Like, if you go back and listen to that show, it's like, okay, they're both definitely swinging hard. Like, you guys should just collab. I don't know what's going on here.

No? Ziggy? Ziggy? You can know about things, but not be part of a thing.

Good point. Thank you, Ziggy. I'm sure you know about plenty of things right now in your mind that you want to have no part of, but you know of them. He's got a point.

Maybe. You've got to convince the listeners. You don't have to convince me. I believe both of you.

We're both self-assured enough not to worry what other people think. Here's my concern. Okay. Yeah.

Me. Oh, look, here. Jared Harper. Well, that was from the CH Pod Lounge.

Well, that was quite the eye-opener of that episode. Ziggy is very worldly. The new set feels unfamiliar, but does look good. Felt like less camera focus issues.

Missing the Powstanie P in the background, though. Gotta work that in somewhere. Yeah, we do. Right now, we're having sound issues.

Yeah, it can go right back there in the chair. Once we figure that out. Here, you want to see it? I can just turn the camera for a second.

One step at a time. There it is. H. Pond Lounge, well, where in the world, do you have the winner for this, by the way?

Because today you're supposed to announce the winner. They were announcing the winner Monday. They had through today. Oh, this would be Monday show.

No, no, no. All right. I had the one that we all had not sat down and talked about. I have one that I have is the favorite.

Which one is it? Well, I don't want to say no. Why not? Because.

Because why? It was the one from yesterday. I don't remember which one it was. Me too.

Me too. I thought it was awesome. With all the allegedly. Yeah, with the alleged, and like they interwove all the episode stuff.

Everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who did that? I don't remember.

That's your winner, dude. Yeah. That's your winner. Whoever that was.

Whoever, whichever one of you guys that was, that's the one. We're gonna, we'll figure out who that person is. But like that was definitely the winner. For sure.

I love that one. Yeah, that one was good. I don't know why. Why does everybody hate me today?

Keep fidgeting. You're fine. I felt like everything was going so well, and then I joined this podcast. It's too low.

You think so? No, it's fine. Stephen Wells says: Where in the world is Phil McGuffey? Further information on the events around the abduction of Phil McGuffey.

This is taken from Secure Memo to the Joint Chief of Staff. Explanation of the current DEFCON 5 status. This started with the abduction of a miner named Phil McGuffey. Evidently, under direct orders from Putin, he was taken because, and this is a direct quote, "The one thing holding communism back is fast food.

They are forcing, I use that term very loosely, Phil to create two fast food companies that will start in Russia, but they have much bigger plans as usual. " But were thwarted multiple times by Cigar Company Protection. These cigar companies had something to do with the top 10 list, which Mr. Cooper, very important to them.

Getting back to the current situation, they are creating two companies, Taco Phil's and McGuffey's Hamburgers. While we don't seem this to actually be a threat, a real threat, the later has a clown. Instead of Ronald McDonald, it's called Donald McGuffey and bears some resemblance to the president. Some idiot gave this information to the president and now we're at DEFCON 5.

This could make the Cuban Missile Crisis look like a garden party. We suggest calm heads and prayers. DEFCON 5 isn't that serious though. I think 5 is as high as it goes.

No, no. It goes the other way. It goes down? Right, Siggy?

Don't nod. Chime in. Yeah, I think it goes the other way, I'm not sure. I thought it went up to five.

If you go to DEFCON 1... Yeah, you're right, it does count down. Yeah. Reminded of some '80s movies that have...

Right, that's what I'm thinking too, the '80s movies. We've moved to DEFCON 3. We're looking it up. Yeah, I'm going to verify.

" Yeah, the lighting is much better, especially on you. We adjusted that quite a bit yesterday. Yeah, it looks, it looks really good. Because at first I was too yellow, then I was too bright, and then I was too dark, yeah, so it's, I don't know what the number is.

Lighting spot on? Audio? Not so much. Not so much.

Oh, let me see. Oh, what did I miss here? Oh, Corey Davis. So what I'm hearing is Ziggy is swinger adjacent from the CH Pot Lounge.

That is actually more accurate than I care to talk about live on air right now. Let's move right along. See? What about you, Palmer?

Swinger adjacent? Nope. Good luck convincing Skip of otherwise, my friend. Yeah, I'm adjacent.

He's never going to let that go. " Utah. Wow. The lady who killed the man watching porn, why is she?

Yes. Yeah. Yes. I watch and listen to the show.

Apparently the DEFCON thing is a really tough question because it's still thinking. It's bad Wi-Fi. There's so much electronics now in a dense area that we're having these issues. You know, I ended up giving up uploading the show here yesterday afternoon and went home and finished.

Really? Yeah, I was at an hour and a half. You just shut down. I just went, this is ridiculous.

This is not working. Right. But there is something going on with the Wi-Fi down. Of course, Greg probably messed it up right before you left.

He's like, ah, we're gonna shut that bill down. Yeah, I don't want to pay that out. Yeah, I'm not gonna be there. Who needs that?

Who needs that? Who needs that? Also, I think it felt like you guys missed out on an opportunity with the Biden camera thing. Yeah?

Yeah. Why did we miss out on somebody with a Biden mask? If that was a kid doing it to prank his friends that were inside. Right.

That's almost like a sigh of relief for me. Well, they never found out who it was. Yeah, I know, but it would track to some degree that the kid knew that his friends were home alone. He's like, "I know what I'm gonna do.

" And he put on a mask, and he rang the doorbell, and he ate a banana. Well, yeah, there'd be some relief if that turned out what it was. Yeah. Sure.

" And I'm talking the relief aspect of the generation because we skipped a whole generation of like the pranksters and the messing around and the screwing things up. Ah, gotcha. You know what I mean? There was this, there's this phase, there's this generation of kids that are terrified to do anything wrong because they know it's going to be recorded.

Oh, okay. Right? Right. Oh God, if I mess up.

And what you do is you, now you have anxiety and these panic attacks and all of this sh** and rampant through our society, Probably through the entire world, right? " You know? And they're doing things. You're just swearing now freely because you can be eliminated.

That's right, I wanted to see. Effortlessly for you. Well, I have that one B-roll, now I have to run through there, too, because you walked in and you just started yelling profanities. That's cool.

Yeah, you can combine it all and just fix it all. " Probably so. You know? Right.

That'd be amazing. Yeah. So yeah, I feel like you guys let that, you know, how did you let that go? I don't know.

Do you see my point, Siggy? No? Oh yeah, and I think this generation, there's just so much out there on everybody that they've stopped caring. Right.

At this generation, you spend long enough on the internet, you'll find something. Right. Now they're looking for stuff, the video, so they can be famous on TikTok or Instagram or... Yeah, but, I mean, there's something to be said about, like, oh, whatever, dude, yeah, I did something stupid ten years ago.

What, you didn't do something stupid ten years ago? You know what I mean? Like, as when you were a kid? Like, yeah, we all did.

Yours was just recorded. Right. And now, like... Yeah, here's the video.

If we can just get to the point where it's not as big of a deal, I think that that would be great. So let's say that was one of their friends. Do you think if he gets caught, he gets in trouble? He shouldn't.

He didn't do anything wrong. Well, yeah, I think we said in the story that he didn't actually break any laws. He rang the doorbell wearing a mask. Right.

There's no law for that. Eating a banana. Nor should there be, you know? So, you guys are a lot of fun today.

You guys aren't saying... I mean, it can't just be a one-person show. It can't just be a one-person show. No, no, I mean, exactly.

Weird is a right for Floridians and Americans as a general thing. So, I think more weird makes life more fun. Absolutely. If you want to hear your comment right aloud on the show, simply comment below on this YouTube page or on the CHPod Lounge.

I look like you're sitting in a hole. Sitting in a hole? Want me to sit up? No, it's just, oh yeah, that's better.

Is that better? That's better, somewhat. I got hit with the, it's that time of the year fundraiser thing for my kids. Uh-oh.

Yeah, so I think I'm gonna, I think I'm gonna do part of the Unicorn Vault thing, the unicorn box that we're gonna list on the swag roll. Right. Maybe I do that for a main prize, maybe do like three prizes, and anybody who donates, if they enter, I'm going to put a pin up on the lounge and just mark that you entered in. That way I can do the random button selector.

Spinny, spinny. Yeah, yeah. Spinny, spinny. Spinny, spinny.

And then we've got to pick our winner. So we've got a lot of things given away. Yeah, we've got a winner for that, and I'll have his name by the next one. And then the skull is going to be next week.

Right. The skull that's supposed to be down here. Right. Yeah, we never got that skull back.

You're going to bring it down for me. Yeah, we're running out. Yeah. Okay.

Just making sure. Just checking. Super busy. Super busy.

Super busy. A lot going on. All right, you ready to move on? I think so.

All right, we're making American-made Super Dogs. Okay. Do you know that all the dogs for the police, not all, but the majority of the dogs for the police and the armed forces and all that come from Europe? Yeah, I believe that.

All right, and the majority of them... East Germany. Majority of them fail training. That makes sense, too.

Right. So, Ward Dogs was launched October 22nd, bringing together Colossal Bioscience, Ben's Lamb, and Adruels Palmer, lucky to develop, Enhanced Working Dogs for Military, Police, and Emergency Missions. So they're going to breed these dogs to be extra strong, extra fast, better eyes, better sniffers, or noses, whatever you want to call it. And then the other guy makes equipment for the military, so he's going to make special goggles for the dogs, bulletproof vests for the dogs that they can wear that are weight, Okay.

Alright. The plan combines cloning and genetic technology to produce healthier dogs, better suited for demanding work. So now they'll have better dogs for the military. Okay.

So they've raised already, let's see, there's a, this is all the stuff that I told you, the announced equipment includes eye and ear protection, we mentioned that already. It's like two million dollars already or something like that. Okay. Okay.

So they've raised over two million dollars to start this new company. Okay. They're just gonna make dogs. All right.

Do you know what their base breed is gonna be? Are they doing Belgian Malinois or German Shepherds? They're gonna crossbreed the two. Oh, Belgians and Germans.

So they're gonna get, yeah, I imagine they'll get three or four types of dogs that they like, that have the characteristics they want, and then they'll just breed it down to whatever. I think there's a big difference between German Shepherds and Belgian Malinois. Belgian Malinois are absolutely insane. Yes.

They are nuts. They make great dogs when you get one that works out, but they are nuts. Yeah. I love my Shepherd.

My Shepherd loves Brittany. She hates it. Drives her nuts. Oh, really?

Because she was connected to your daughter the last couple of times I was over there. " Well, yeah, especially, well, if there's somebody over, I feel like bubbles will go more towards Shepard's Teddy, but as far as everyday life, follows Brittany everywhere, drives her absolutely up a wall. Doesn't she do all the stuff for her? The feeding, the letting out, and all that stuff all day long, 'cause she's home.

Yeah. Right, so that's why. Yeah. She's become attached, 'cause Brittany's her caregiver.

Lays by her side, you know, wherever she goes, stares at her. Right. Yeah, like a stalker. Aww.

She loves mama. So, what do you think, Malinois or Shepard, if you had to pick? Honestly, the Malinois, they got a little bit more personality. I know I said they're entirely crazy.

Plus, the Malinois don't have much hip problems as the Shepherds do. A lot of Shepherds got to get retired early because their hips start acting up. If they can fix that, that would be amazing. I mean, they let the handlers keep their dogs when they're no longer serviceable, but still to get more life out of the dogs before their hips end up.

But Malinois for me. I don't think that even if you're, but even if you genetically breed an animal, that doesn't mean you can guarantee his personality. No, they're just going over the characteristics. Personality, yeah, that's a completely different thing.

Because like, they'll bang pots and pans around these dogs and see who responds and get scared or whatever the case may be, and then that dog is not, you're not going to change that dog into... Oh, they won't breed that one. But breeding, it's not going to change that. You don't know, like, oh, this dog is, this dog is, The dog doesn't react to pots and pans and banging, so we're gonna make more dogs with this one, that doesn't, that's not gonna...

It doesn't make a lot of sense, but what else they have to go from? Unless they're just gonna make them in a test tube. Well, you look at the pedigree, you look at the paws, you look at the shape of the dog, you look at those things, that's what you would use to breed the animal. Well that's just the physical traits.

Right, that's, and this is my point. My point is that no matter what, you're still gonna have personality issues with some of these animals. Yeah, but in the past, they've bred dogs to be meaner, or to be less aggressive, or, I mean, you could breed those in and out. You just pick the ones that don't have it, and then, you know, it's like a crapshoot, but that's, really, what else do you have to go with?

So what you're saying is it doesn't work? No, I'm not saying it doesn't work. Maybe it must work enough for them to keep doing it. I don't think that it works that way.

Siggy, what do you got? It puts it in the right direction, but you'd be amazed how much the trainer, the actual handler, affects the personality of the dog, just during that training process, it's uncanny. You have this high-energy, stress-ridden trainer, and of course the dog is like that, you know, but I'm curious to see how this works out for them. It'd be nice to not have to import those dogs from Europe, too.

If they pay for all of them, then they're not, you know, they don't get to use a whole lot of them. My dog's from East Germany. Well, soon you can have a made in America one. I like my dog.

I'm going to turn your volume up, because you're driving, it's driving me nuts. And when he talks, it picks up on our mics. Yeah. Because he's further away from his microphone.

Hold on one second. Doo, doo, doo. He is, la, la, la, la, combo two. East Combo 2.

Okay, try that now. What did I just drop? A cigar. No, my cigar.

Thank you. Yeah. Go ahead and talk in that. Yep, there we go.

Oh, he sounds so much better. All right. But he still picks up on ours. Yeah.

Well, we got to fix that echo in the back. You're going to have to board that up. Oh, bouncing off the wall? Yeah.

Oh yeah, behind me? Yeah. Yes, that definitely probably is happening. But he sounds so much better.

Yeah, he sounds better and it's less picking up on ours. Yeah. Okay. All right, Universal Orlando is making some big changes with nine closures affecting ride shows and restaurants.

What? A lot of people have decided not to renew their passes for 2027. What? Most are temporary, but one longtime favorite is shutting down for good.

Fids. I don't know what Fids is. What's Fids? It's the Irish bar.

No. If you got a Universal Trip coming up, here's what could be missing when you get there. Here are the nine closures listed. Attraction closure dates, expect to return.

So we have Hogwarts, Hogwarts Express. That's closed. November 4th, 2026, listed as a one-day closure. It's just one day.

Oh, okay. That one. Well, they're not all one day. Jurassic Park River Adventure.

That's also being redone. January 5th to December. Yeah, they're redoing it. Yeah, it's closed now.

Okay. But it's been closed all year. Okay. Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey, February 8th to the 19th.

For one day? Uh, 8th to the 19th. Oh, 18th. Okay, so for two weeks?

Yeah. Two weeks. Popeye and Bluto's Bilge Rat Barge. Love that ride.

It's only closed, it's closed, uh, oh, January through February, so 30 days. Yeah, when it's cold. Okay. Maybe it's not cold.

Yeah, it's cold in January. Fry Drill, Epic Universal, I don't know what that is. Fry Drill? Fry Grill?

Is it a grill? It's supposed to be Fry Grill? It says F-Y-R-E-D-R-I-L-L, Epic Universal. January through February.

Okay. Horror Makeup Show. Yeah, that's old school right there. Closed May 12th, might open again at the end of the year.

Okay. Finnegan's Bar & Grill, January 12th, expected back winter of 2026, so it closed January. It should be opening here sometime soon. Okay, that's a big one.

Volcano Bay. Yeah, they're remodeling the whole place. The entire park is closed. Yeah.

October 26th, so next week until mid-year of 2027. So they're going to do a lot of it in the cold? Well, that makes sense. Makes sense, yeah, okay.

But a final before, what was that? There was something there. There was something there. " Okay, Universal Studios Orlando, yeah.

Permanently closed. Gone forever. Okay. Closes November 3rd, you still have time to go see it.

I'm good. November 2nd is the last performance. Okay. The article, they make it sound a lot worse than it is, right.

It sounds like a hit piece, but then when you go back and you look at it, you're like, okay, yeah, like, so that, oh, hey, we're updating all these things, and we're just closing... Right, there's nine rides that we're updating for you. Yeah, and we're closing the... For days at a time.

We're closing the animal show that no one goes to see. Yeah, no one sees the animal show. Okay. Maybe that's a stripe of...

Maybe they got in trouble. You think so? They have like parrots and stuff. I don't think they got...

Oh, nobody cares about parrots. Nobody cares about parrots. It was on a Disney website, too. Oh, yeah?

Yeah. No matter what. But it made Google, the Google Trends, it was a trending story, but every link took you to a Disney website. Right.

I tried to find the actual story. Okay. All right. In February 2025, Jathan Gilder posed as a representative for a basketball player.

And he went to Tiffany's in Millennial Mall. Who's Jathan Gilder? Just some dude. Okay.

Nobody's... Do you know Jathan Gilder, Siggy? I have no idea. No, he's nobody famous.

Okay. But he went to Tiffany's saying he represented somebody famous, and he did see a bunch of diners, And a bunch of diamond earrings. Oh, okay. Yeah.

So they lay out the diamond earrings, pushes the guy back, grabs the earrings, makes a run for it. Okay. Turns out he was from the Panhandle. Okay.

So, he changed license plates on his car. They still caught him up in Washington County, not sure where Washington County is, but he grabbed $760,000 worth of merchandise. Oh, wow. As they pulled him over, he starts chucking them in like chicklets into his mouth.

Oh my God. He's going to have an uncomfortable visit to the hospital. He's going to have an uncomfortable visit to the hospital. He's going to have an uncomfortable visit to the hospital.

But he dropped one of the backs in the car, and they found it. Oh. And it says Tiffany's on the back piece. Oh my God.

" Yes, we can. That's what they said. That is a drug addict, because you can't charge people for drugs they've used. So he's mixing up his case law there.

Oh, really? If you swallow drugs, they can't get you? There were some case laws set up, like if cocaine is in your system, you can no longer be charged for possession of cocaine. So if you smoke it up real quick, you escape the charge.

So this guy is clearly a jailhouse lawyer that does not know what the heck he's talking about. I like all his info he has, it's pretty cool. He's a plethora of knowledge. On many things.

Yeah, on many, many things. I'm a worldly person, like the color commenter said. Like grass and black rings and pineapples, you know? So apparently the-- But you have to use them all combined.

You can't just do the one. Right, just do the one. Because when he said black rings, I looked and I was like, uh-oh. I know.

So did I. Oh, God. It's tungsten. It's not actually black.

It's shiny metal. Brittany, Brittany, I need you to jump on Amazon right now. I need a red one. Wait, wait, let me tell you what red means.

It's clear or okay? Does clear qualify? What are we doing? Alright, they have a body scanner at the jail where they took him.

I didn't know prisons, they had those. Yeah, well that's because, you know, they hide stuff up the poop chute. What, don't they just don't look anymore? They body scan you.

Oh. Yeah. And how do you know this, Michael? Because I'm a prison expert.

Oh, okay. Yeah, I've done several years in the book. You've done several years? Yeah.

Oh. Like, you know about prisons, but you've never been to prison and you're not a prisoner. It's kind of like knowing about swingers and not being a swinger, right? That's correct.

It's something you guys would know nothing about. Because, you know, I don't know. Okay, police recovered the diamonds after they passed through his system. Oh, God.

Ziggy just died. Hey, just for the record. When you get that new wedding ring, make sure you know where it comes from. It's an earring.

Not from Tiffany's. This one is discounted. The earring smells funny. It's got a weird scent to it.

Anyway, so they sent him back to Tiffany. Tiffany's had to clean them. Right. The police didn't go to that trouble, apparently.

Oh, if you guys could just take care of this. Right, just send them back. We're not touching them. " A jury convicted Gilder of robbery and grand theft.

Prosecutors announced on October 22nd, so he just got found guilty yesterday, the day before. And now he's waiting on sentencing. I heard that diamonds aren't even worth what they were before, like they've been losing their value. Oh, I thought you meant because he had poop out of them.

No. I mean, on top of that. On top of that, right. With the poop.

They don't tell people. They just package them back up and put them back up. Of course, it's Tiffany's, bro. Yeah, they're fine, right?

It's not a consumable. Right. Maybe they came out cleaner, you know? I guess.

Stomach acid. I mean, stuff like that's supposed to make coffee better, so. Yeah, exactly. Like the Koopy Luwak or whatever it is.

Right. Which he knew about, too. Yeah. Yeah.

I knew about that from the cigar industry. Oh, really? There was a cigar called Kubi Luwak. Oh, I know about it from the movie, um...

Swingers? No, not Swingers. You watch that, yeah? No?

That's where you got your info? No. No? No.

Just from real-life experiences? No. Yeah? No.

It's okay. It's all right, man. Whatever you want. I don't judge.

You live your life. All right. Ready to move on? We have cigar news.

Did you pitch Siggy on the way out at the last episode, or no? Hey, just so you know. Pitch Siggy? " No?

I don't know what you like to do. I'm talking about you. Oh, I don't like to watch. No, you don't like to watch?

No. Who wants to watch their wife being railed by some other dude? Oh, instead you just turn to the wall? You just know what's happening?

No. No? No. Okay, whatever you gotta do.

I just want you to know, you have my support. Whatever makes you happy. We're not coming over, stop asking. I just want you to be happy.

We're not coming over. I won't be happy coming over to your house. Are you sure? I know you won't be.

All right, ready for cigar news? Yeah, whenever you are. All right, apparently National Nut Day needed a cigar release, and Be So Horny has delivered with post-nut clarity. Oh, my God.

Tyler Jeffries' latest creation comes from Nikasuenya and Esteli Nicaragua. Comes from the dirty mind of Skip Martin, who will not taint his Roma Craft brand, however. However, if you don't make this name, I'm not making a cigar. S.

Broadleaf wrapper, African Cameroon binder, and all Viso long fillers. Viso leaves grow in the middle of the tobacco plant, balancing strength with combustion ability. It's a four and a half by 56 box press cigar that the company describes as having the girth to satisfy. Oh.

Also from Skip Martin. Because apparently, subtly, subtly, wasn't on the blend sheet. Production is limited to 750 10-count bundles totaling 7,500 cigars. Retail is $15 per cigar or $150 per bundle.

Retail orders opened yesterday. We got a press release yesterday. He never contacted me. He sent us the press release.

He texted me about the other one. He said in his press release if you wanted, you gotta call him. - Big time now. - Your shirt?

- I gotta call him. - October 22nd with a shipping estimated for November. Follow vsohorny on Instagram for participating shops. Light one, lean back, and reflect on your choices.

Apparently Clarity now comes with a cigar band. - Okay. It's weird it doesn't ring anymore. - Mine stopped doing that too.

Must be an update. - Oh, there it is. - Oh, it takes a while to connect? - Yeah.

Hey, what's up, man? Hey, you're on the podcast right now. Oh, hey, how's it going? Good.

Hey, I got a question for you. So you texted me yesterday talking about the Mo Viso collab. The re-Vertigree. The re-Vertigree.

But you didn't even bring up Post Nut Clarity. Well, the reason I didn't bring it up because I wasn't going to announce it yesterday until it brought to my attention. And when I got my attention, it was National Nut Day, and I'm like, well, we have to put, we have to announce it now. It has to be announced on National Nut Day?

National Nut Day. Okay. Yeah, so, me, well, Skip and me, mostly Skip, me come up with a beautifully written press release. So, I didn't, I wasn't trying to steal the spotlight from the other release or anything.

Ah, that makes sense. I got it. Yeah, it was just no nut. No Nut, and then we're rolling into No Nut November, so we'll see what happens with people.

Okay. So you're not quite taking orders on that one yet, then? No, I'm taking orders now, yeah. I just read that.

Oh, so then why wouldn't you have brought it up via the text? Because after he talked to you... Actually, I was just about to text you my sales sheet. I mean, it looks pretty nice, actually.

Okay. All right, we'll take all $750. Well, we'll talk off the top. - We have exclusive distribution for Bosco and Charity.

- Hey guys, you guys are the next brand I bring in. I've been telling you guys this before, so I've taken longer than I wanted to, but you guys are family and I've known you guys for a long, long time. I only own a small percentage right now. Hopefully, within six, seven months, I'll have the full control.

But right now, it's like, it's kind of like, if I want to bring in a new brand, it's kind of like going to my grandpa and saying, "Hey, grandpa, can I borrow $500? " It just feels like you're asking for money, so I try to not ask too much, you know? I think that's fair. That's fair.

It sounds like you had a grandpa that kind of loved you. Yeah, he did. He was kind of the reason why I got into tobacco in the first place. P.

Grandpa Tom. That's nice. Yeah, but yeah, we're taking pre-orders, and, yeah, I'm really excited, I think the package, I also need some of the packaging mock-ups, but Skip has been, his brain's been, he's been coming up with the coolest shit, the way they're doing the bundles, it's like origami, and it's no detail, like, yeah, these, I mean, they're craft paper bundles, but they're, like, top-notch packaging, so, I'm really, really excited. And they've been enrolled since January, so they're smoking really good.

We're just waiting on the packaging and fine-tuning everything. All right. Well, I look forward to it. And I look forward to the other one, the ReVertigree.

ReVertigree. See how we did, we only did 200 bundles of those. And so I got some slack for using AI, so I actually hired a really good guy, Fiverr, to do both labels. He did both labels, he did, I think it was 150 bucks to do both labels.

And he used AI, which was, which made it okay. That's right. I know, and I'm like, dude, this looks, I just- This looks exactly like AI. I've been wanting to confuse.

I know, and I'm like, well, and I even ran the images in AI, I said, do these look like AI? They're like, well, no, you can tell they're handwritten. I'm like, yeah, but people are gonna still roast me online. And another thing too, I was so, I was a little worried about the name, Post Not Clarity.

But Skip said he wouldn't make it unless I called it Pulse Nut Clarity. But then I'm seeing cigars called Sophisticated Hooker, Happy Ending, Small Black Puss, Swollen Cock, so I think Pulse Nut Clarity is, in the scheme of things... I think you'll be fine. Yeah, I mean...

Yeah. Stop worrying about... Listen, here's what I'm going to tell you. Here's what I'm going to tell you.

Yeah. Don't worry about anybody else. Do what you want to do. Make what you want to make.

Someone's always going to say something regardless. So just do what you want to do. All right? Yeah, but you know me.

I'm a sensitive-- Sally? Sensitive Sally. Yeah, sensitive. Yeah, I am.

I'm working on it, though. Yeah, exactly. This is part of that process. So-- Yeah.

Congratulations. Thank you. Thank you. Good.

Thank you. You're getting there, dude. And, you know, I look forward to the Post Not Clarity coming out. Store exclusive here.

It's like our husband. So nice. No, but seriously. And I'm looking forward to the...

Revertigree. Revertigree. Revertigree. Some people say vertigree.

I don't like anything. It's on the grease. I don't like that. But revertigree, it sounds a little more, a little more, um, uh, palatable.

Yeah. You're all over the place. PostNutClarity and revertigree. I get it.

I can see how they, how they blend. Well, they're different, you know. See, even with Patina, we dropped a horny. you know it's a it's a it's a it's a more um it's a less horny it's a more it's a more refined refined yeah that's that's sir tyler sir tyler okay and uh shoot there's one more thing oh yeah i can't wait to bring in your brand too because i love that sumatra you guys did thank you i'm smoking it now that sumatra is fantastic it's one of the best sumatras out there i agree i'm not a I'm a big Sumatra fan, but you guys did a great job with it.

Thank you. And the one skipped stuff. Yeah, it's great, great, great, great. You're a sweet man.

All right, I'll let you get back to work. I appreciate you. Thank you for always answering my call. And we'll talk soon.

Love you guys. Love you, buddy. Love you too. All right, bye.

All right, bye. He didn't say he loved you, Siggy. He doesn't know Siggy. Yeah, I'm sure he would.

He wouldn't, though, if he had met him. Still a new guy, so that's fine. Had he met you, he would he would definitely call you for all his swinger information. You know, the stuff that you don't know about firsthand.

Because he's about to get married, he's about to get married, so. That means nothing. What part? Firsthand knowledge.

Or the fact that he's about to be married. Yeah, whether he's a swinger or not, that means nothing. Yeah, if you're getting married, it doesn't mean, right, exactly. Well, I figured maybe, you know, she would, I don't know.

Can you not get me in trouble with Tyler? We've just had a good conversation. Yeah, I love him. Can you say anything?

- Okay, thank you. - Atoro Fuente's Blackpink gets full release. - Oh. - After a soft launch in March, Atoro Fuente is preparing for the nationwide release of the exclusive Blackpink line.

- Yes. - Next week, the company will begin shipping the line to stores across the country. Atoro Fuente Rare Pink Vintage 1960s Blackpink, the line's full name, is part of the company's Hemingway brand, though it is an offshoot of Rare Pink, itself a sub-brand of Hemingway. Like other Hemingway Cigars, it's offered only in Perfecto Vitolas.

That's very confusing. It was a TAA exclusive, but now it is opened up to the market. Correct. Because the TAA is not what they used to be.

Not what they're saying in a flash release. Oh. Well, I mean, I'm just, okay, what do they say? This is me, please don't get me in trouble.

This is me just speculating. Limited shipping now open to all shops. Right. In March.

Oh. Well, it was limited shipping... In March. Ah.

Way before TAA. Yeah, but wasn't it last year's TAA release or something? I'm trying to not say. Don't say anything.

Don't get us in trouble. You're the one who keeps saying stuff, not me. Yeah, that's who I am. You want me to not be me?

Yes. I'm sorry. Um... Oh.

Well, um, okay, hold on. In March, surf, Wednesday, shipped a small allotment to retailers that were members of the TAA. Oh! At the time the company said it would wait at least six months before the full release, the pricing has not been changed from the March shipment.

There you go. There we go. Wow. So here I am, just giving out true factual information.

That they admitted to. Which is the important part. Which is fine. There's still true and factual that they don't admit to.

Not that company specifically, but there's still that. In the world. Right. All right.

Rocky Patel, The Matrix. announced as a TAA 2026 exclusive. Ooh, is it bent? Is it bent?

Is it like a bend? No. No? No, it's the Matrix.

Yeah, the Matrix. The spoon? No. No?

No. Is it endorsed by Keanu Reeves? No. Is it green and black, at least, with some circles?

No. I believe the box is maroon. It's maroon? That's not even Matrix-y.

Head of next week's annual meeting of the Tobacco and Association of America and their famous Eyes Wide Shut Party. Rocky Patel Premium Cigars, Inc. has announced its new exclusive cigar for the retail members of the group. Enter the Matrix.

The Rocky Patel Matrix is a new 6x50 Toro that uses a Connecticut broadleaf wrapper over a Nicaraguan binder and fillers from the Hammerstrand Valley in Honduras. The company says the cigar is medium plus with notes of earth, nuts, and chocolate is being made at the company's, how do you say that, Tavisca? Are the sizes like Morpheus and Neo and stuff? There's only one size.

I already said the size. Is there a red pill? Is there a blue pill? I already said the size.

No? The TA membership group is around 80 retailers, probably 40 manufacturers. They gather annually to discuss issues facing the industry and retailers, and then they have their parties. Listen, I think at this point, if you're making a TAA exclusive, you should probably make just like 50 boxes, you know what I mean?

Probably at this point. Yeah. You know what I mean? You missed the Espinosa TAA yesterday.

I heard. The Warhead. The Warhead. Yeah, it's got the TAA logo on it.

That's pretty neat. Those are the boxes Greg and I saw being made when we were over at the Box Factory. Yeah, that's cool. Because they were everywhere.

I hope they didn't make more than 50. Well, if they made enough for all these boxes we saw, they made more than 50. They made more than 50? Yes.

Okay, we have an update to the Artesanio Del Tobacco. See, feel free to chime in anytime. Anytime you want to. I'm still stuck back at the Blackpinks and what names those Vitolas are going to carry because I'm sure those are going to be just as salacious.

Oh, yeah. I can't spell salacious. I know, I love having him on. He brings a level of...

Intelligence? I was thinking of something else. Worldliness? Yeah, that too.

Superiority? Yes. Or would you say Dominance? No.

Let's get this back on the rails. All right, let's get back to the story. These guys were the ones that were taking a vote to see which country and what factory that they made their next cigar. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You remember? We have the results. We have the answers. We have the answers.

Based on responses from 703 people. Stop it right now. 703. That's a lot of relatives.

Not 700. Yeah. Not 699. 703.

703. We need one more. We need one more. Make it an odd number.

When they asked what factory should we use next? Yeah. So the country that was chosen was Honduras. Okay.

9% of the 703 people said Honduras. I feel like we picked something out of the list. Like here's, this is the one that we think they're gonna use. Well, I think we picked a factory, but we didn't never, I mean, I don't know why they're specifically saying all this stuff.

All right, top factory in Honduras is Tabaco de Oriente. Okay. I think it's the one I picked because it said Orient and it's like a China thing. Fabrica De Puros, Aladino, they didn't pick that one.

No, interesting. 9%. I would have picked that one. Yes.

2%. That one wouldn't have been bad either. Alright, top factory in the Dominican Republic. Okay.

Tablicalera La Isla. Okay. I think I picked that one because that's where they make the Crocodilio. The Crocodilio Cotilio?

Cochitilio? No, no, that's the tobacco. Oh, that's the rare tobacco. That's the rare tobacco.

Yeah, that's the rare tobacco. That's where they make the Crocadilio cigar. Okay. 1%.

Okay. Tabacalera Palma. Okay. 7%.

Hmm. I don't know why they give them top factories in every country when they... Well, they give you the data. Hmm.

Top factory in Costa Rica is the Tabaco de Costa Rica. Makes sense. 7%. And there must be only two factories in Costa Rica, because the second one got 42%.

It was very close. It was very close. The other half of the votes. The IGM cigars.

Was there like seven voters? 703. Yeah, but like just for the Costa Rica. Just for Costa Rica?

Yeah. Maybe just the two, I don't know. Yeah. Just the two.

Just two people voted? Then it would have been 50/50 split. Okay, three. Three?

Three people. I don't think it would have worked out that way. The math wouldn't have mathed. They fudged a little, like the 703.

They fudged it? Just throw some stuff in? The 703. Can't make even numbers.

People won't believe us. We don't even know them. No, we don't know them. They make that octopus cigar that I like the name of.

Yeah, El Pupo. El Pupo. Yeah. I pulled up behind a Jeep the other day on the road and it had a big octopus on the tire cover.

" Handling. It's time for what? It's time for the industry's favorite game. What's the score?

Two positive clues. I have a place for you to do that. I don't know where it is anymore, so I just hit it. I will point to you or stop talking.

And by the way, we gave him the sparklers yesterday. I know, and he lost, because he went too high. '91 would have been reasonable for that. I understand that you liked the cigar, and if Charlie liked the cigar, '91 would have been, boom, spot on.

You just gave it a little too much on that. Yeah, I'm a hopeful person at heart, so I'll learn. Eventually I'll be cynical. '91's good.

You just should have played strategy at that point. He came in at '90, you just said, okay, you know, then you had to hit him with the Price is Right number. You didn't want to overbid. You're just one higher.

Yeah. And you would have nailed it, and there would have been sparklers, champagne from the heavens. Skip all that stuff there. Yeah.

Patrick Le Greene, October halfway. You can't look at the screen, do like Ziggy, and look that way. Still all-star. Stop looking at the screen, 'cause you're gonna see the score and it's not gonna be fair.

Oh. Oh. He adjusted himself in the chair so there would be no shenanigans at all. No question of his integrity.

I can't guarantee shenanigans, and I can't guarantee my integrity. -Integrity. -Ahhh... -Well, what if he can see it now?

-He can't see it. He doesn't look. He's already established that fact. -I like the fact that I'm making you uncomfortable to play this game.

-October 22nd, 2026, reviewer Patrick LeGreed from Half-Wheel... -Half-Wheel? -Half-Wheel? -Will you sit back?

Cigar the Stilwell Star Aromatic Dulce Claro Petit Robusto. Patrick, Stillwell Star, it's a Pipe Tobacco Cigar. 87. The No Cheater Siggy?

Wow. The Integrity Chats. That's a Petit, I mean, that's a small cigar too, Petit Robusto? Yes, it's a 5x48 specific.

Hey, it ain't cheating if you're swinging, you know what I mean? They're down too. I'm gonna go 85. I'm gonna go 85 and go up right there.

I'm gonna go 85 and just pivot out of this conversation. All right, the MSRP is 1495. It's from Hoya De Nicaragua. Stop looking.

I can't see it anymore. You're leaning out, trying to. No, I wasn't. I was just casually leaning.

Rappers, Ecuador, Connecticut. I was kind of giggling at myself. Seed, binder, Mexican, San Andreas. I don't care.

I was just laughing at the fact of my, you know, filler. Filler, Nicaraguan Tobacco in Cornell & Deli, Black Cavendish, Golden, Virginia, and Red Virginia Pipe Tobaccos, they smoke three cigars. I'm holding fast here at 87. And I'm going to stay at 85, because I think they'll be more judgmental about Pipe Tobacco, but we'll see.

Alright, clue number one. All three samples performed exceptionally well, delivering dependable draws, even burns, and plentiful smoke. The reviewer particularly praised how closely the cigars matched one another throughout the experience. So he's just, the consistency is a positive, and it tasted good.

There's plenty of places to go still downhill from here. I'm staying at 85. Oh, you went in front of me. Oh wait, I'm not supposed to.

No, you're good. You can do fine, whatever you want. Yeah, you can do whatever you want, buddy. And, uh, I'm going to go 87 still.

Are you getting tired? Clued number two, yeah. You're nappy pool. Positive clue number two: Dessert-like aromas.

What? Let's just go back to the old mics. Dessert-like aromas accompanied a sweet profile that avoided becoming overwhelming. As sweetness receded, dried tobacco and light pepper emerged, giving the closing portion more appeal than the reviewer typically finds in this category.

You look like some kind of model or something. I am a model. You know what I mean? I am.

I love a cigar. I forgot to grab a cigar before the show. I still didn't listen. 87.

And I'm gonna stay at 85. Glue number 3. This cigar terrible. I don't like is no good.

Individual flavors were sometimes difficult to distinguish. The aromatic components blend together, leaving the reviewer wanting clearer separation and more noticeable nuances beneath the sweetness. I'm gonna challenge that bottom number and go 84. I don't think I can go that low yet.

We're still at... I'm staying at 85. I'm staying at 85. Alright, final thought.

Final thought. Excellent construction supported an enjoyable dessert-oriented smoke with medium flavor and body. Relatively mild strength and roughly an hour of smoking time. Great flavor.

Definition could have elevated the experience, but its sweetness remained controlled and its tobacco character survived. I can't see it. I can't see it. He may have just seen it.

No he didn't, because it's not even on the sheet yet. Okay. And it's backwards. We didn't have that devastating review upon this one at any point.

That's because it wasn't a Charlie review. Yes, Patrick is much friendlier. Yeah. I'm going to take the 87 that, that.

Oh, yeah, I'm going to move up. Yeah, I'm going to go 86. He wins, 88. You went the wrong way.

Are you sure? I'm positive, I already looked, 88 backwards, it's still 88. You got a great view of your ear. Thank you very much.

Oh, yeah, going over to the side. I forgot I moved the camera. Back to the bathroom. There it is.

Wait, so I actually won one of these? You won! Oh, congratulations. That's a first.

Oh, your first time is always the best. Is that what they say? Set off the fireworks, you'll see how they work there. You want to test this out anyways?

Oh yeah, let's... oh yeah, they need to be repositioned. No, no, is the other one on that side? Or is it on this side?

This one wouldn't come on yesterday. The production company is questionable at best here. Well, the foreman took over. What do you think, go back to the mics, the other mics?

If you want to. I mean, it's the same splitter, we just, we could try them next time and see what happens. I wish you figured out what that setting was. It's just a setting.

I reduced it. It was just the decibels before. Now it's not doing it. Let's see what it sounds like right after I'm going to plug it in and listen to it.

" Oh, the other ones? Oh, yeah, right, I know. You still have the floor stands and everything. I mean, they're out of the way at this point.

The mics? Yeah. Well, the problem was you didn't like it covering your face. Yeah, but now we're going this way.

Oh, it'll be slightly at an angle? - Yeah. - We can drag 'em back out, just some cords and a couple of things. - There you go, this is our life.

- I like having this up here a little better because now it's not as awkward for me to turn in when they talk. - Yeah. - Yesterday was. - I'm still gonna buy a Mac Daddy surge protector and plug everything into this.

- Oh, that's fine, that would make the things a whole lot easier. We just put it right there in the middle. - Yeah. Okay.

- All right. - Do your thing, say goodbye. - All right. It's not edumatainment, by the way.

It's not edumatainment? It's edutainment. I like edumatainment. I don't.

Educate my entertainment. No. Well, anyways. Look, you can have your sign off.

I can have mine. They don't have to be the same. Okay. Well, listen.

Like and subscribe wherever you want to listen to the show. com for all your chpod swag. I'm going to give you the link for the fundraiser thing, so you can add it in here for me. If not, my wife will kill me.

And then we're going to have some good giveaways for that stuff on the CH Pod Lounge, so make sure that if you contribute, first of all, thank you very much, and my kids and myself are very grateful for that, and hope you win something cool, and my wife, yeah, and... Good show for that. Yeah, yeah, and that, I think that's it. com, My Cigar Houses Podcast.

Hope we've provided great edutainment for you today, on this Monday, with questionable sound. All right, guys. Thank you very much. We got to go.

Bye. Bloop.

Show Notes

Description

https://mybooster.com/v3/dash/xVR8Ti63

The crew opened with sound problems on a newly rearranged set, a rundown of the day's stories, and updates on the CH Pod membership site and a kids' fundraiser. They read Comments from the Lounge, then covered American-made super dogs, nine Universal Orlando closures, and a man who swallowed stolen Tiffany earrings. In cigar news they took a call from Tyler about his Post-Nut Clarity release with Skip Martin and the Revertigree, then covered Toro Fuente's Black Pink full release, the Rocky Patel Matrix TAA exclusive, and the results of a factory vote. The show ended with What's the Score? on a Patrick Lagreid halfwheel review of the Stillwell Star Aromatic Dulce Claro Petit Robusto.